The Holiday Office Party
by Scout24
Summary: Nathan and Haley find themselves confronting the reality that their feelings for one another go beyond friendship. Nothing like a holiday party to help one realize that they are in love with their best friend.
1. The Realization

_**Disclaimer**: I do not own One Tree Hill. It is of course belongs to Mark Schwahn and the CW. Anything you recognize from the show are not of my creation._

_**AN**: It has been so long since I have posted, that it feels somewhat strange to do so. But nevertheless it feels good to be back and posting again. I know I've been gone for a fairly long time, which I first want to addresses by apologizing. I've had an amazing time writing for this fandom and being able to share my stories, especially because of the support I have gotten from so many. I can't find the appropriate words to express my gratitude, but I do hope that thank you, although simple, conveys my appreciation for all that have been so amazingly supportive of me throughout my several writing endeavors. It means the world to me and I apologize for being away for so long and not in much contact. I'm not one to make excuses, so I will just say that life has gotten a bit hectic in the past couple of months and as a result, my writing unfortunately has been neglected. However, recently I had a stroke of inspiration and used that fire to produce this story. I'm hoping that this inspiration will continue to burn and maybe result in some more writing. For those of you who have followed me in the past, I have opened up my PM once more if you want to message me. Please feel free._

_This is an AU story, that focuses of course on Nathan and Haley. It will be a two parter._

_I hope you all enjoy it._

Haley James felt some laughter bubble in her throat as she took in the scene before her. Bringing her glass of white wine to her lips, she took a slow slip as she attempted to hide and muffle her laughter, to no avail. It came out in a light lilt, causing her to cover her mouth in order to shield from her co-workers the fact that she was laughing.

She didn't know why she was trying so hard not to laugh. All her co-workers were. After all, it wasn't everyday you saw your boss in a drunken stupor, walking around in a santa hat, singing Christmas carols at the top of his lungs. Definitely not an every day occurrence, especially since in the year that she had known Doug Johnson he had always walked around with an air of dignity befitting the senior partner of one of New York City's leading law firms.

She remembered when she had come into the firm for her first interview, a complete nervous wreck, which was only increased when she met Doug Johnson. She had taken in his starched white shirt, pressed suit, buffed shoes, monogramed cuff links, confident stance, and knew he was as serious as they came. Doug Johnson didn't take things lightly, not at all. He had made that quite clear when he and his law partner Thomas Macnamara welcomed her into the firm, telling her that although they led a law firm that welcomed the intellect, drive, and ambition of newly minted lawyers, they expected that the young lawyers they hired to represent their law firm did so with the dignity befitting a successful team. For them, tom foolery was not only a waste of time but also a waste of intellect, a sign of a lack of respect. She supposed however, that that very dignified outlook on life had been lost on Doug Johnson tonight as she him break into a rendition of 'I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Clause' complete with cursing and innuendo.

Laughing once more, she tried again to hide her laughter, realizing she did a poor job when Joe from the finance department gave her a small knowing smirk in response. If she didn't think it was inappropriate she might roll her eyes, or hell flip him off at the display. Not normal behavior for her by any stretch of the imagination, but when it came to Joe Turner he was the exception.

He was a good fifteen feet away from her, thank goodness, and yet she could still feel the sleaziness that always seemed to hang around him as if it was permeating her skin. He was a creep to be completely honest. The guy in the office, who if he wasn't asking a female co-worker out, was instead blatantly checking her out. He had done both with her, numerous times, which all added to why she found him completely repulsive. That and the fact that he did those things as a married man, his gold wedding ring shimmering on his ring finger for all to see.

When she had been hired a year ago, as an associate for the law firm of Johnson & Macnamara, Joe had been one of the first of her co-workers to greet her. She had made the mistake of being friendly to him, shaking his hand in greeting when he had held his own out to her. Of course at that point she hadn't known the kind of person he was. Immoral and reprehensible. That and she was raised to always be polite, no matter what the circumstances. However, after he had held on to her hand for far too long and then followed that up by asking her out for drink that night, breakfast in the morning, she had gotten a pretty clear picture of the kind of person Joe Turner was.

Of course she had decided to give him a chance. Not only had she been taught by her parents to always be polite, they had also taught her to always give a person a chance. Don't judge a person until you really get to know him. That was the James Family motto for which she had stood by her whole life. So she decided to do just that, heading warnings she got from people who were well acquainted with Joe and his ways. She as quick to learn that those warnings, that her gut instincts had been right. The gut instincts she had felt when she had first met Joe, the instincts that told her to keep away from him, to try to avoid him as best she could, had turned out to be right.

About a month into working at the law firm, she had gone down to the Accounting Department to deliver a payment that one of her clients had given her. Joe had unfortunately been the only one around who could handle billing and so she had no choice but to seek his assistance. At first things had been fine, he had been nice, helpful, polite, but fifteen minutes later he was asking her out for a drink once again, placing his hand on her shoulder as he did so. It had taken her every once of control and decorum, not to slap his hand away, before kneeing him in the groin. She had after all grown up with two older brothers, a male friends. That's exactly what they would have encouraged her to do, and then some. But she had restrained herself, shrugging his hand off her shoulder before making her way back to her office.

Since then she had done a pretty good job at avoiding him for the most part, which wasn't too hard now since she had a secretary who could bring her clients' bills and anything financial down to the accounting department for her. Initially she had felt bad about subjecting her secretary to Joe. In all honesty Joe was pretty harmless. A bit sleazy, somewhat inappropriate, but pretty much harmless. Yet with a female secretary it just hadn't sat right with her to send the secretary down to accounting to deal with Joe. In fact, it had plagued her so much so that for the first three weeks that she had a secretary she had made all her deliveries to Accounting herself. However, that had stopped when she became well aware of the fact that her secretary, Peyton Sawyer, could hold her own.

She should have realized of course that Peyton would be able to deal with Joe from day one. Peyton was as feisty, strong willed, and confident as they come. It was one of the main reasons why she had hired Peyton in the first place. In fact, Peyton had said during her interview that she didn't "deal with the bullshit."

At first, she had been rather taken aback that someone would use such language during an interview at a prestigious law firm nonetheless. But she had soon found herself respecting the conviction with which Peyton had said those words. Peyton had been completely honest, trying to provide true insight into who she was as a person, and she had found herself quickly admiring Peyton's candidness. After an hour interview, she had been able to tell rather easily that Peyton was just the kind of person she needed as a secretary. A secretary who could handle the fast paced world of a law firm, be collected, confident, as well as hard working and diligent.

She found out rather quickly, that Peyton was all that and more, when four months ago, Peyton not only took it upon herself to go down to Accounting to deliver a client's bill, but also took it upon herself to let Joe know just how sleazy he was.

She hadn't actually seen the encounter between Peyton and Joe go down, but she had heard through the office grapevine that when Joe had asked Peyton out for drinks and then made the fool hardy mistake of putting his hand on her waist, she had quickly smacked his hand off before explaining to him the physical harm she would inflict upon him if he ever touched her again.

Okay fine, Peyton had said way more than that. From the rumblings she had heard from her very impressed co-workers, many of the threats were ones she could not repeat, not even in her mind, for fear of blushing a deep bright red. But she was proud of Peyton. Very proud. Proud to have a secretary that could more than hold her own.

A secretary. Her secretary.

She couldn't help but let out another laugh, this one however not having to do with amusement, but rather one having to do with disbelief. It was the same laugh of disbelief she had let out when Doug Johnson and Thomas Macnamara had called her into the law firm's boardroom one day, six months months ago, and had told her that not only were they giving her a promotion, but they were also going to provide her with a better office and a secretary.

As a lawyer fairly fresh from law school, a junior associate who had only been working at the law firm at that point for six months, it had been quite the shock. Hence the laugh of disbelief. She remembered asking Doug and Thomas if they were sure, positive that she was the the tail end of an elaborate joke. Silly question to ask your bosses, especially one of them was Doug Johnson. Of course Doug wasn't the joking type, but Thomas who was the polar opposite of Doug in every way, was.

Thomas was an incredible lawyer, smart, and highly skilled, but he was also more laid back and easy going. He was the type of boss who dropped by your office to catch up with you, not on how your latest case was going but instead to see how your spouse was, your family, your friends. He was kind and complimentary in a way that Doug Johnson most certainly wasn't. So practical joking was definitely Thomas' style.

But Thomas had not been joking, a fact she had become well aware of, when after she had finally quieted her laughing, she had looked up to see Doug and Thomas' very serious faces. She remembered praying then and there for the ground to open up and swallow her whole, her face blushing profusely in a manner that it hadn't done since she was in high school and had gotten herself in another embarrassing mishap in front the entire student body. Needless to say, when Doug and Thomas had asked her if she wanted the position, she at first couldn't find her voice to respond. She was sure she must have stared at them for a good minute, trying take in all that had happened. Their proposal, the fact that she had laughed like an imbecile in front of her bosses, two men whom she greatly respected and aspired to be, two men she was sure thought that they had just offered a very much sought after job to a crazed person. But when Thomas' repeated the offer, before giving her a kind smile, she had snapped out of her small reverie and had said yes. Yes…..about one hundred times, all in succession. Yes, yes, yes.

Of course she had said yes. The offer had only been one which she had been striving for her whole life. Okay, maybe that was a bit dramatic. She hadn't exactly been striving to be a lawyer her entire life. Hell when she was five years old she had wanted to be a ballerina. However, that was until she almost drowned in the play balls at a local kid's indoor jungle gym and realized rather quickly that grace and poise just wasn't her forte. But two years later she had begun to dream about being a lawyer. Not exactly the typical dream of a seven year old, but then again she had never been a typical seven year old.

Like most kids her age she had spent most of her days being a kid, playing tag with her best friend Lucas, building forts, conquering jungle gyms, playing pick up games of basketball. Yet when she hadn't been doing those things, she was reading books, thinking, reflecting…...planning. Planning her future.

Yes, it sounded a bit ludicrous to her own ears. A seven year old planning their future. Okay fine, it was actually preposterous, but it was the reality. She had been a carefree, spirited child, and in so many ways she still was, but she had also liked order, plans, and certainty, very much in fact. So at the age of seven after a good friend of her parents had visited the family and regaled them with tales of her life as a lawyer, crusading for what was just and right, helping those who were given no voice, fighting to defend issues dear to her heart, she had known she had wanted to be a lawyer.

Everything she had done after that point had been in pursuit of that goal. She worked hard in school, especially high school, devoting herself to her academics. After four years her hard work paid off when she was accepted to Stanford University. There she continued to throw most of her energy into her studies. College had given her the challenge she needed, as well as the opportunity to focus her energy on law, as a pre-law major. It hand't been easy, especially what with balancing classes, two jobs, and other responsibilities, but she was able to survive, getting accepted into law school her senior year. If she had thought college had been a challenge, it hadn't compared to law school. It was at law school that she discovered that working hard, putting forth all of one's energy, striving diligently for a goal, did not always means things would go smoothly. It was a true reality check for her, for someone who had done so well in school, often surpassing her classmates. During her first year she found herself barely surviving, the coursework so hard, the dedication required often demanding so much of her that she had felt herself getting lost in the demands. But after a few months of continuing to focus her energy and the support of her friends and family, she was able to find some solid ground. From there she excelled, and graduated law school at the top of her class, with a magna cum laude degree.

She had been proud of herself, very proud. For working hard, for pursing her dream, for following her heart. Her family had been very proud as well, especially her parents. Of course at the celebratory party they threw for her the day she graduated law school, they had told her that she had sold out to the man. They had been joking of course, well half joking. As two very liberal social crusaders, her mother a photo journalist, her father a social worker, they had been a slightly appalled when their youngest daughter decided to take a position at a corporate law firm in New York City. Her father had said she had fallen into the slimy hands of the 'corporate leeches' who sucked the life out of the world,. But they had known her heart, had known that her intentions for taking a job at a corporate law firm was so that she could build enough capital in order to one day start her own firm. One that would be established to serve those who did not have a voice, those who were often taken advantage of by society, shunned by it, with little to no recourse. Plus, taking a job at a corporate law firm gave her the means to do pro-bono work until she was able to establish her own law firm. So her parents gave her their blessings, telling her that they were proud of her, that they would always be proud of her no matter what.

Macnamara, Johnson, and Associates truly was the ideal place to help foster the long term goals she had, which was one of the reasons why she decided to take the job they had offered her a year ago. However, initially accepting the offer had actually been hard, far harder than she imagined. Hard because working at Macnamara, Johnson, and Associates meant she had to leave behind her home in Tree HIll, North Carolina in order to move to New York City.

She had grown up in Tree Hill, North Carolina, had made memories with her family, had created long lasting friendships, had become so much of the person she was today in the small southern town. So it was hard leaving, even painful. She loved her home. It was a part of her.

Of course to most, Tree Hill, North Carolina was barely a blip on their radar. A small North Carolinian town few people knew about. But it was her home. A home she had loved, a home she still loved….and missed.

She missed the house she had grown up in. The house that she and her five brothers and sisters used to run around, making loud booming noise, so much so that the neighbors would drop by to complain, only making her mother encourage them to make even more noise. She missed the summer days she used to spend at Tree Hill's River Court. It was a dilapidated basketball court that few people paid attention to, but it was where she had spent so much of her childhood with Luke and her other friends, Mouth, Junk, Fergie, and Skillz. Sometimes she would play ball with them, although she had never been good, certainly not as good as they had been. Most of the time, she would sit on the warm metal benches that lined the court reading a book, watching every now and then as the guys would run up and down the court. She missed the afternoons she used to spend down at the Tree Hill Marina, looking out into the crystal blue water, often times loosing track of time, sometimes on purpose so that she could see the sun set over the town she loved, the water of the marina looking as though it would swallow the sun. She missed going into Karen's Cafe, the diner owned by Luke's mother, her second mother. Most of her childhood had been spent in the cafe, often on the roof playing on the miniature golf course Luke's father, Dan, had helped them built. Karen's Cafe had been a part of her which was why she had begun working there as soon as she could, saving up money to pay towards her college education. It was a perfect job. Karen had been a wonderful boss, the cafe a comforting place to be, the people of the town so friendly. She supposed that was what she missed most about Tree Hill: the people.

With Tree Hill being so small it was easy to know everyone in the town. It was not uncommon to walk into any place in town and be greeted by name, walk down the street and see a familiar smile looking back. That was hard to find in a big city like New York. She missed the comfort she used to feel knowing those around her, but most of all she missed the comfort of being around her family, her friends. She was very close to her family, pretty inevitable when you grow up in a small house with seven people. But it was more than that. They all had varying personalities, could clash and fight, like no one else, but they worked. They blended perfectly, knew each other so well, loved one another fiercely. It was hard being away from them. While her older brother Brian and older sister Vivian lived a couple of hours away from home, her other siblings lived either in Tree HIll or a few towns over. Being in New York, she was the one who lived the farthest, which was not always easy.

Yet while missing out on time with her family was hard, missing out on time with her friends like Luke was also hard. While she was close to her family, she was really close to Lucas. They had grown up together, had done so much together, were practically brother and sister. But since she moved to New York she had rarely gotten to see Lucas, since he lived in Tree Hill with his wife Lindsey and their newborn baby girl. The last time she had seen him, was about two months ago when Lucas had to make a trip to his publishers in New York to talk about an edit to one of the books he was currently writing.

Meeting up with Lucas in the city, being able to spend some time with him, had really reminded of her of the old adage 'there's no place like home.' There really wasn't. Which was why she was happy Christmas was in a few days. It meant she could head back home. She wouldn't be able to stay long, would have to return in order to come back to work, but even a few days in Tree Hill was a blessing. It was a few days that would allow her to go see Karen at the cafe, drink some coffee and eat the best apple pie, as she and Karen talked and laughed. It was a few days that would allow her to enjoy her family's annual Christmas festivities, where she was sure to see her brothers and sisters, Lucas and Lindsey and her new god daughter, Karen and Dan, and others that were close to her heart. It was a few days that would allow her to go down to the Marina, sip from a hot cup of hot chocolate as she watched the sun setting over the water as she had done so many times as a little girl.

She missed home. But that didn't mean that she didn't love New York. She did. A lot actually. The city was beautiful, spectacularly so. It may be difficult to walk down the street and see a familiar face like in Tree Hill, but that was because there were so many different and new people in the city. She liked that. Liked the fact that the city offered her the ability to gain new experiences. For someone who had lived in the same town all her life, for someone who was so used to doing precisely what was expected of her, doing precisely what she thought was expected of her because the people around her knew exactly who she was, she was able to step away from that. She didn't go too far of course. She was Haley James after all and staying within the parameters of rules, order, and expectations was a piece of who she was. But she had been able to push herself in the city, push her limits, find pieces of herself that she was sure she wouldn't have had the courage to look for had she not lived in the city.

It was hard being away from family and friends but she had carved out a life for herself. She had made a home, found places to love, friends to hold dear. It had been a hard transition but she had done it by trusting in herself and with the help of people that cared so much about her like Peyton, Peyton's husband Jake, their friends Sarah and Clay…...Nathan.

She smiled softly before coming out of her thoughts in order to scan the room around her. There were a lot of people around., Johnson, McNamara, and Associates was a big law firm after all, with two hundred and fifty lawyers, fifty paralegals, fifteen accountants, ten computer analysts, and scores of secretaries, assistants, and interns. They housed five floors of an office building in lower Manhattan, which was helpful, as the building had a large room where they were hosting tonight's festivities. It was a packed house with mostly every employee there, along with the spouses and friends that they had brought along to enjoy the night. It was so packed in fact, that it was rather hard to make one's way through the room without literally bumping into people. Luckily though, since she had arrived early she was able to find a spot in the room that afforded her some breathing room. It also gave her the ability to take in the entire room quite easily. She couldn't help but feel another smile come to her face as she did so.

Normally, every year the partners paid someone thousands of dollars to set up the firm's event room for the annual holiday party. Not only was paying someone to set up the party, seen by the partners as convenient due to the lack of time they had, but it also got them out of doing what they all saw as a painful task. It wasn't exactly shocking. She couldn't imagine Doug Johnson, Thomas Macnamara, or any of the other partners for that matter spending days on end decorating for the holiday. For people who saw little to no value in pomp and circumstance, whose free time was spent at the racquet ball club or a golf course, such an activity as holiday decorating wasn't exactly their cup of tea.

But it was her cup of tea. She loved decorating for the holidays, had since she was a little girl and her family would spend a whole day decorating her house for Christmas. Some of her favorite memories from her childhood came from those days. Memories of making Christmas cookies with her mother and sisters, as her father and brothers set up the Christmas Tree in the family living room. Memories of decorating the Christmas Tree with their family ornaments, all of them reliving stories of when they had gotten the ornaments, each one with its own special story. Memories of sitting around the Christmas Tree when they were finally done with all the decorating, eating cookies and sipping hot chocolate, singing Christmas songs and reliving their shared memories of Christmas. Her family had always gone all out for Christmas, her parents insisting they do all the decorating together. She remembered sometimes her older siblings complaining about the fact, especially as they got older and found some of their decorating traditions 'lame,' but she had always loved it. They had been a close family, had done so many things together, but it was during the Christmas season that she could always feel an overwhelming sense of closeness between them. It was the main reason for why she had volunteered to decorate for the holiday Christmas party.

The promotion that she recently got did not just come with a new office and secretary but also more cases to work on. She wasn't complaining. She admittedly was a workaholic, had been since she was a little girl and would ask her teachers for extra assignments. She liked work, it kept her busy, motivated, and focused, but the unfortunate part about having so much, at least right now, was that she wasn't going to be able to head back home to Tree Hill until Christmas Eve. As a result she was going to miss a number of the James family traditions. For the most part she had been able to keep her disappointment and sadness over the fact to a minimum. In the history of the firm, no one as young or as new to the firm had achieved such an accomplishment. But it was still difficult knowing she was going to miss doing certain Christmas traditions with her family, traditions she always looked forward to every year with anticipation and happiness. So she had volunteered to decorate for the firm's annual Christmas party as a means to ease.

She had known it wouldn't be the same. That decorating for the firm's annual Christmas party would not bring her the same joy she got when she decorated with her family for the holidays. There would be no food shopping with her mother for the ingredients they needed for the Christmas feast her mother and Karen always cooked. There would be no giggling with her sisters as they watched their father and brothers struggle to get the Christmas lights up on the exterior of the house, a mishap or small accident happening without fail. There would be no Christmas movie watching with Lucas as they sat comfortably on her family's overused couch, munching on popcorn. But even with those realizations she had figured that decorating for the firm's holiday party would at least give her some means to feel close to her family.

That of course was before it dawned on her that decorating a Christmas party for over two hundred people was not even close to being the same as decorating for her family's annual holiday get together. Granted, during Christmas Day her family had the entire James clan over, including her grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, as well as close family friends like the Scotts. It was often hectic at her house, especially since the eccentrics didn't stop at just her immediate family. Yet even taking into account her screaming nieces and nephews, her grandmother who always drank way too much of the spiked egg nog, and her crazy uncle Pete who managed to hit on at least one female member of the family, none of it compared to the craziness she had been dealing with the past two weeks as she prepared for the firm's annual holiday party.

Of course she had been warned. First, by the partners who had been weary of her taking on such a project when she was already knee deep in cases. But she assured them she could handle it, explaining to them that juggling many things was something she was more than used to, something she liked to do. Yet even with her assurances she could see that they were still hesitant about her taking on decorating for the holiday party, which had only made her that more determined to do it. This of course led to Peyton, Jake, Sarah, Clay, and Nathan all telling her that what she had volunteered to do maybe wasn't such a good idea. Like the partners they had told her that she had way too much on her plate, only to add to it. But like she had done with the partners she had assured them that she would be fine. Fine because once again she had found herself determined to do what she had volunteered to do. She hated backing out of things, just as much as she hated not finishing something, but most of all she hated accepting defeat. Stubbornness. It was one of her best qualities and her worst.

The past two weeks she had cursed her stubbornness and her inability to shy away from a challenge, as she had found herself overwhelmed with the details of setting up the party. She had known she was in way over her head when the firm's head secretary dropped by her office to deliver the list of people the partners wanted her to invite. Two hundred and fifty people. Two hundred and fifty people. That was how many people the partners had wanted her to invite, the same number she had repeated over and over again, not only to herself but to Peyton, Jake, Sarah, Clay, and Nathan when they went out that night for drinks. Two hundred and fifty people she had to feed, entertain, and impress. Impress because she had known she was not only being watched by the partners, but by the people around her. Twenty-six years old, fresh out of law school, almost a year into the law firm, and she had been given a promotion that most people who started out in the same position as she, had worked years to achieve.

She had been screwed. So screwed.

But her friends hadn't told her that. Not even Peyton who was as blunt and scathingly honest as they come. They didn't even tell her they had told her so. Instead for four hours that night they had sat with her at the bar helping her map out how she was going to create a holiday party for the firm.

Some of the ideas they had shot around had been good, some had been terrible, really terrible to be quite honest, especially as the night wore on and more beer was passed around amongst them. But she remembered taking it all in and feeling an overwhelming sense of happiness. Happiness when she, Peyton, and Sarah poked fun at the guys for suggesting that the menu should include beer and wings. Just that. Nothing else. Happiness when they all screamed 'no' when Peyton offered to help bake the cookies for the party. Peyton was an awful cook. Awful. Happiness, when she got Nathan, who was not one for holidays, to agree to dress up as Santa Claus for the party. Of course she had to bribe him by promising to come over to his apartment every night for a month to make dinner, saying her cooking reminded him so much of his mother's. But it was well worth it.

It had been a good night, a great night, and it had helped her in the weeks leading up to Christmas. Helped because Peyton, Jake, Clay, Sarah….Nathan…..they were like her own little family in New York. It amazed her sometimes, the fact that in just a few months, she was so close to them. Of course she had known Nathan all her life, but Peyton, Jake, Sarah, and Clay had only come into her life a few months ago, and yet like her family she couldn't imagine her life without them. They were important to her, special to her, and looking around the room she couldn't help but be reminded why.

Not only had the five of her friends helped her brainstorm that night at the bar for the firm's holiday party, they had also helped her set up for the party as well. It had been quite a two week project for all of them, which had culminated last night when the six of them spent practically the entire night decorating the room. To be exact, it had taken them about seven hours, four bottles of wine, two pizzas, some talking, some laughing, hell even some bickering back and forth, but they finished, the room looking fantastic as a result.

Looking straight across from where she was standing in the room she could see the Christmas stockings that Sarah and Clay had put up on the wall. Sarah who was a Kindergarten teacher had actually gotten some of her students to help her put some of them together. The rest had been left up to Clay to help her with, which hadn't turned out so well when he arrived last night to help with glitter literally everywhere on him. His clothes, in his hair, on his face. It had been quite the look for one of Manhattan's leading stockbrokers, a fact which Clay had lamented, saying there was no way he was going to work looking like a walking Christmas ornament. It had been amusing of course, even more amusing this morning when Sarah called her and told her that it had taken a hour and half shower, some primping, and some of Sarah's make up remover to take the glitter off. Even then Sarah had said there was still some left on Clay, confessing that she hadn't told Clay, finding herself humored by seeing her husband head to work with glitter still strewn through out his hair.

She laughed to herself at the thought, turning to take in the drawings that they had spent a good hour posting up on the wall. They hadn't allowed Peyton to cook for the party, hell no. She hadn't wanted to risk making people sick, especially her bosses. But they had allowed Peyton to make most of the artwork for the party. Besides being an incredible, wife, mother, and secretary, Peyton Sawyer was incredible artist. It was her passion, had been since she was a little girl and her parents had given her a watercolor set for her birthday. Peyton had fallen in love with art and so it became deeply ingrained in her life. Peyton had focused on art in high school, had majored in it in college, and it had been the major driving force for why she chose to move from Maine to Manhattan three years ago. However, Peyton pursing art in Manhattan was not so easy, especially once she was married, and then pregnant shortly thereafter. With rent, bills, and other expenses that were a natural part of life, Peyton had been forced to take a job to supplement her artistic endeavors. The ad for a new secretary, that she had put in a local help wanted newspaper had been one of the first few that Peyton had seen. A stroke of serendipity if you asked her.

Sometimes she couldn't help but feel slightly guilty about Peyton being with her. She and Peyton were very close and so she knew just how talented her friend was. So talented that Peyton being her secretary just felt…..wrong. Like she was being held back from what she was born to do. But she couldn't deny how much she loved having Peyton as her secretary. They were complete opposites with Peyton being blunt, a little corse, cynical, yet laid back whereas she was even-tempered, kind, patient, yet neurotic. It was their differences that made them work so well both as friends and in the work place. When she was stressing out over a case, it was Peyton who told her to snap the hell out of it. Literally. When she needed to take a stern stance with one of her clients, it was Peyton who helped encourage her to do so. When she was dealing with balancing life and work it was Peyton who reminded her that while work was important, it was a small importance in comparison to all the other things she had in her life. She honestly needed Peyton in her life, as she kept her sane most of her days, but Peyton also needed an outlet for her artistic energy. She was glad the party had given that to Peyton.

The art Peyton had done for the party was absolutely gorgeous, it really was. There were paintings upon paintings of winter scenes hung up on the walls that were shockingly sentimental and heartfelt. It was rather unlike Peyton, who was a little dark, her paintings a bit depressing. Of course she loved that about Peyton's artwork, most of her paintings having the power to evoke emotions and feelings within her, but dark and depressing were not exactly a good theme for the holidays. But Peyton had stayed away from her normal themes making paintings of winter landscapes, children sledding, people caroling. She had no idea how Peyton had found the time to make the ten paintings that she had, but she was so grateful as the artwork added a little extra something to the party.

Smiling to herself at her thoughts, she was broken out of them when she heard Doug Johnson break out into yet another song, this time "Winter Wonderland."

She was going to kill the boys for putting so much damn rum into the egg nog. Seriously. Then again she supposed it was her own fault for giving them the task of setting up the bar last night, so she, Peyton, and Sarah could focus on setting up some of the cocktail tables she had ordered. By the the time she had reached the boys, they had already poured a bottle and half of rum in the egg nog she had made. She had chastised them of course to which the boys responded, by joking that the spirits they had added to the egg nog would be sure make for a really fun Christmas party, since it would lighten up a room full of stiff, lifeless lawyers. She had laughed at that.

So far it had been fun, thank goodness, but some people like Doug Johnson were definitely having too much fun. Not only had her boss been breaking out into Christmas songs every time the music mix Jake had made for the party played one, he had also been going around the party engaging in other behavior that was definitely not typical for him. The highlight had been an hour ago when he had grabbed his wife of forty nine years and proceeded to kiss her over and over again, claiming she had been standing under mistletoe. She had been standing under a Christmas wreath.

She couldn't help but laugh to herself as the scene played over in her mind, Doug Johnson still singing 'Winter Wonderland.' She knew he wasn't going to be happy with his behavior come tomorrow morning, which frightened her a good deal as she was in charge party, but she couldn't help but feel slightly humored. There was nothing the screamed the holidays more than getting your boss completely smashed at the holiday office party.

She laughed once more at the thought, this time bringing her wine glass to her lips attempting again to hide her laughter. She was fairly certain that laughing at her boss after getting him drunk at the annual holiday office party was just not the way to go, especially since she valued her job. Definitely, definitely not the way to go, she couldn't help but tell herself.

Glancing to her left she spotted Joe Turner once again giving her a knowing looking, letting out a bit of laughter himself. Part of her felt the need to roll her eyes as she had yearned to do minutes before, but she couldn't help but give him a soft smile. She knew it wasn't probably the smartest thing to do, well aware of the fact that he could possibly take it as an indication that she was acknowledging him, but she couldn't help it. It was the holidays after all and her incessant need to be as kind as she could be was overwhelming her.

That and there was some comfort in the fact that someone around her was as amused as she was with the antics before her, especially what with the fact that none of her friends were to be found. Granted Clay and Sarah had called her earlier in the day to say they wouldn't be able to make it as both were too tired from the night before. She had been slightly disappointed as she had wanted to celebrate with them, have them enjoy all the hard work they had put into the party, but she had understood, especially what with Sarah being pregnant. Sarah wasn't that too far along, only in her first trimester, but she had been experiencing some fatigue every now and then. Clay who was every bit the adoring and dutiful father, excited and thrilled about he and Sarah's new arrival, was insistent that Sarah take it easy when she needed to. She missed them for sure, especially Sarah who was just as much in love with holiday festivities as she was, but she would rather have her friend take it easy. Like Clay and Sarah, she was completely over the moon that they were going to have a baby.

Smiling at the thought she scanned the room looking for any signs of Peyton or Jake, wondering if they had possibly gotten lost in the crowd. She knew for certain that Peyton and Jake were going to be at the party as Peyton had confirmed so at work. In fact, Peyton had been rather excited, to her surprise. With Peyton's often gloomy outlook, she wasn't too big on the holidays. She didn't hate them, but she wasn't the kind of person to look forward to them, only really putting effort into celebrating for the sake of Jake and their two year old daughter, Jenny. But when she had asked Peyton if she was ready for the party that night, expecting a sarcastic remark, instead Peyton had told her she was pumped for it. She was pretty sure her mouth had hung open in shock, only closing when Peyton admitted that the only reason why she was truly excited was to see what antics people would get into at the party. According to Peyton holiday office parties tended to push people to getting a little loose, engaging in behavior they did normally engage in, especially when alcohol was involved.

She couldn't help but chuckle a little at how right Peyton had been. Pretty much anyone who had touched the egg nog was in high spirits tonight, engaging in some outward behavior, rare in a firm full of lawyers, many of them pushing forty. Even those who hadn't touched the egg nog were happy, laughing and talking animatedly with one another. Peyton would be amused, highly amusing, which was why she wished she could find Peyton and Jake. She could definitely use some of Peyton's dry and witty commentary right about now. Definitely.

Sighing she looked around the room, giving a smile to some of her fellow associates who were talking amongst one another at a table a couple of feet from her. They signaled for her to come over but she politely declined, giving them a small wave and a smile. She felt rude doing so, especially since she was pretty much the host of the party, but she was hoping that Peyton and Jake would show up…..or hopefully Nathan. Though she wouldn't blame the latter if he didn't show up. Not at all.

Sighing again, this time at herself, she couldn't help but turn to the big Christmas tree that was set up in the corner of the room that was adjacent to her. It was beautiful. Truly it was. Definitely one of the biggest she had seen, not including of course the tree in Rockefeller Center, which she had visited many a times since it had been put for the holiday season. That was enormous. But the one at the party towered a good couple of inches over the trees her family would buy for Christmas every year during Tree Hill's annual holiday fair.

She actually hadn't planned on getting a tree so large, especially since she and the others had already been dealing with so much with the party. She didn't want to add to any stress levels. However, the partners had insisted that the party have a large tree. So she had ordered one, taken aback by how large it was when it was delivered last night. At the time it had just been she, Peyton, and Nathan since they had a had to wait for the others to get off of work and then downtown to meet them at the firm. Nathan had immediately laughed, while Peyton had rolled her eyes stating dryly that she had really out done herself. It had taken she, Peyton, Jake, Clay, and Nathan about thirty minutes, to just set up the tree, it being far too heavy for the boys to lift alone. By then they had all been wiped out, Sarah having fallen asleep sitting in a chair as she had watched them set up the tree, not participating because of her pregnancy.

At that point she had told them all to go home, to which of course they objected, saying they didn't want to leave her alone to do the rest of the set up for the party. They had done a good deal of work, but even then there had still been a number of tasks left. Yet she had insisted once again that they go home, telling them they needed their rest. They finally agreed, Clay wanting to get an exhausted Sarah home, and Jake and Peyton wanting to pick up Jenny, from Jake's parents' apartment.

Nathan however, had still objected to leaving her alone, stating that he didn't want her heading home by herself so late. She had been about to object, joke about the fact that she was an adult and could handle herself, but had stopped herself when Nathan had given her the 'look.' The look that Nathan always gave when he refused to back down from something. She was well acquainted with the look. Very much so, because in the twenty years she had known Nathan Scott she had seen that look many times. In fact, Nathan was far more stubborn than she was. It was a fact she had learned when she had first met Nathan.

It hadn't been a good first meeting, a fact that she and Nathan now laughed about twenty years later. Yet back then, their first meeting had kept them at odds for a very, very long time.

The animosity between them had started over something inconsequential, pretty silly actually, but as children they of course had not viewed it that way. She in fact, had nearly declared war on Nathan Scott because of the incident, only stopping herself because he had after all been the big brother of her best friend, Lucas. But it had been hard, downright painful for her because Nathan had done something her six year old heart just couldn't take. He had hurt Mr. Waffles.

Of course Nathan to this day still denied the fact that he had, claiming it had been the Scott's old dog Scout that had attacked the beloved stuffed bear that her Nana had given to her on her fourth birthday. But she knew the truth, just like she had known it then. Known because she had actually witnessed him committing the crime….sort of.

Okay, fine she hadn't actually seen Nathan commit the crime a fact that had Nathan smirking years later. But she had seen mud on his clothing. The same mud that had covered Mr. Waffles when she had found him face down in the Scott's backyard. For her, that had been evidence enough.

That particular day, she had been over the Scott's house playing with Lucas. She and Lucas' had just become friends, after she had met him a few weeks prior. Lucas had just moved from Charlotte to Tree Hill with his family, a fact she had been very excited about as it had been very rare to see a new face in Tree Hill. To her dismay however, Lucas had said very little to her the day he arrived to her forth grade class, having been nervous about being in a new town. However, after a little coaxing from her, he had finally begun to talk. By the end of that day they had hit it off, a friendship solidifying rather quickly in the following days. They had spent every waking moment together as she showed Lucas around Tree Hill, had introduced him to her friends Mouth, Junk, Fergie, and Skills, had had help Lucas assist Karen as she set up her new cafe. They had been inseparable. Which was why she had found herself at the Scott's house that fateful day Mr. Waffles had been injured by Nathan.

Of course, up until Mr. Waffles had been maimed, as she liked to explain it, Nathan always rolling her eyes when she did so, everything had been fine. She and Lucas had spent the afternoon running around the Scott's backyard playing tag and other games.

Back then she had been accustomed to wearing a bright red cape, one that her mother had sewn for her. It had been a bit weird, she could fully admit that now, but back then she had loved the cape, always feeling so strong, so invincible, so fearless when it was adorned on her shoulders. That day she was with Lucas she could remember feeling like she was flying as she ran around his backyard with him, zipping past trees, jumping over rocks, rolling around in the grass. It had been a great feeling, an amazing feeling, one that had left her in a state of happiness when Karen had called she and Lucas into the Scott's kitchen for some fresh baked cookies. That was when she had finally met Nathan and the joy she had been feeling had immediately left her.

He had made fun of her cape. Of course it hadn't been the first time someone had done so. In fact, her brothers and sisters had often commented on her cape, rather scathingly so. She had built a thick skin as a result. But Nathan had broken right through that, rather harshly. She didn't know why, still didn't to this day. Maybe it had been the way he made fun of her, telling her that she looked 'so stupid in her cape.' Maybe it had been the tone he had said it in, full of contempt and hate. Or maybe it had just been the fact that he had just met her at that point, hadn't known her in the slightest, and yet was judging her. Whatever it had been, she had retaliated back by doing what she had often did back then when someone made fun of her. She had marched quickly up to where he had been standing in the Scott's kitchen and had kicked him in the shin….hard. So hard in fact, that he had began crying immediately, a fact Nathan still denied. Nathan Scott didn't cry. Oh but how he had cried that day, which only escalated his anger and her own, making the situation worse from there. Nathan had told her that she was a stupid girl, she had told Nathan he was a stupid boy, he had launched at her, and she had gotten in a swift punch to his nose before they had been separated by Karen, who had left the room a few minutes before the incident to answer a phone call.

Both of them had immediately been reprimanded by Karen, but Nathan had gotten the brunt of it, mainly because Lucas, who had witnessed the entire event, had laid full blame on his brother. Nathan had not been happy with the situation, not at all. Karen had told him to apologize to her and Nathan had refused, quite adamantly so, giving her, her first experience of how stubborn Nathan could be. Beyond angry with her, Nathan had stormed out of the kitchen when Karen sent him up to his room without any cookies.

She had thought that would be the last of Nathan's torment of her, at least for that day, but had found out she had been wrong when she and Lucas went back outside to play some more and found Mr. Waffles face down on the ground his head ripped off and floating in the Scott's pool. That was when she began crying…...hysterically, so bad in fact that her mother had to come pick her up.

It was after she had calmed down over a cup of her mother's hot cocoa, that she accused Nathan of harming Mr. Waffles. Her mother had told her that she shouldn't accuse someone especially when she had no proof, but she had proof. As she had left the Scott house in tears, she had seen Nathan at the top of the stairs, mud stains all over his clothes. If that hadn't been proof enough, the gloating smirk on his face had been.

Nathan to this day said that her evidence was circumstantial, that he could have gotten mud on his clothes from doing a number of things that day. God he was such a lawyer, sometimes. But it had been him. She had been sure of it, and it was that fact that kept her mad at him for years. Of course he had been mad at her too. More than mad. It wasn't every day that Nathan Scott got punched in the face, especially by a six year old girl. He had only been one year older than her, but being attacked by her had wounded his pride…..a lot. They had refused to talk to one another, let alone spend time with each other unless they had no choice but to do so. However as much as they had wanted to, they hadn't been able to avoid each. Not just because Lucas had been her best friend, but also because the Scott's became very close to her family. Karen had hit it off with her mother, the both of them having similar temperaments and interests. Their fathers as well became friends. Dan Scott had played professional basketball and her father had been quite the fan, so it had been common for both of them to get lost in hour long conversations about basketball. As a result, holidays, celebrations, family vacations, and the like were all shared between the James and Scotts, thus keeping her and Nathan in close contact, to both of their dismay.

However their antagonistic relationship eventually changed.

It had taken awhile, high school to be exact. With she and Nathan both stubborn, no one could keep a grudge like they could. Yet by high school, with both of them preoccupied with their lives, they had little time to put so much effort into hating one another. Yet the dislike was still there, intensely so. So intense, that when Nathan asked her to help tutor him for his classes her sophomore year she had flat out refused.

And yet, she had found herself completely shocked by the fact that Nathan Scott had turned up in the Tree Hill Tutor Room in the first place.

She had volunteered as a tutor at the center since her freshman year and not once had she seen Nathan anywhere near the place. Not at all. Hell she had been sure he didn't even know where the Tutor Center was. As Tree Hill's star basketball player, Nathan had focused all his time and attention on the game. Academics were not important to him, a fact he had made very clear, particularly to her when he would make fun of her over the fact that she treated school as her top priority. It was when Nathan had made fun of her for her love for school, that she had hated him the most.

As someone who loved school, found joy in tutoring, happiness in a book, it had been quite difficult for her to be accepted by her classmates. Like Nathan most of her peers saw no value in school, their energies and attentions focused more on the issues that they believed mattered. Going to the mall, hitting up the latest house party, attending the next basketball game, dating the most popular in school…..that was what most of her peers had concerned themselves with. But not her. She instead had thrown her attention towards school, her volunteer work at the Tutor Center, her job at Karen's Cafe. She had fun of course. Lucas and she had still been best friends, that solidifying even more during high school. Along with Junk, Fergie, Skillz, and Mouth they had spent their free time having fun, still hanging out at the River Court or Karen's Cafe like they had when they were kids. They didn't much bother themselves with the things that most teenagers did, not even Lucas and Skillz, who had both played for the high school's basketball team, and had been just as popular as Nathan. But they hadn't much cared for parties, chasing girls, and the like as Nathan had. Lucas and Skillz had been happy with just the five of them, doing the things they loved.

And she had been happy too, more than happy, being herself, pursing what she loved. That was of course unless Nathan made fun of her for it and made her feel like there was something wrong with her. He especially loved to make fun of the fact that she spent much of her free time tutoring. Saying it was so not so surprising that a nerd like her would waste her time tutoring complete losers. She had hated his views of the Tutor Center, of the people who sought out help. To her, her students weren't loser, but simply people who just need someone to help guide them. To her the fact that Nathan looked down on those who need assistance was disgusting. But his statements hadn't surprised her. That was the kind of person Nathan had been back then. Too cool for school, for anyone and everyone.

That was why when he had showed up at the Tutor Center that particular day looking for help, she had been shocked. At first she had thought Nathan being there was a joke. That maybe he had finally discovered where the Tutor Center was located and had figured that toying with her would be a good way to pass his time. She hadn't been happy to see him there, the Tutor Center being the one place in the halls of Tree Hill High School where she had felt safe. It was why when Nathan had walked through the door of the center and her initial shock had worn off she had asked him angrily why he was there. She didn't normally talk with such venom, especially to someone coming into the Tutor Center, but Nathan always had a knack for pissing her off and the smirk he had on his face when he saw she was none to happy to see him, had set her off. He had told her that it was a free country and that he was allowed to be there to which she had joked that she had been shocked he knew where the Tutor Center was since she had been sure he had only known the location of the high school's gym. Not her best come back, but it had done the trick setting Nathan off. They had gotten into verbal match of course and she remembered being thankful they were alone, since their fight had been made complete with yelling, name calling, and some pretty hurtful statements. She had been the one to stop it, at that point being too tired to go on, asking Nathan why of all places he had to bother her in one that she had loved and cherished so much.

That was when she witnessed something in Nathan change. The anger in his eyes that had been directed at her during their shouting match, the anger that had always seemed to be directed at her diminished, replaced to her shock by remorse. If that wasn't enough to shock her, he threw her for a loop when he actually apologized to her, saying that he hadn't meant to bother her at the Tutor Center, but that he needed her help.

At that…..she had laughed. A lot, loudly, intensely, so much so that she had ended up tearing up a little bit. It hadn't been every day that Nathan not only apologized to her, but also asked for help. In fact, up until then he had never done any of those things in regards to her or to anyone else for that matter . It had been….well it had been shocking. Shocking and….funny, which was why she had laughed, only stopping when she had looked up and saw not only the anger back in Nathan's eyes, but hurt as well.

She had felt remorse, had felt horrible for having such a reaction to what he had said. Really and truly she had. As much as Nathan tormented her, as much as he had made her life a living hell….the pain she had seen in his eyes that day in the Tutor Center…...she had never wanted to be the cause of that, not ever. It had been heartbreaking.

She had apologized, Nathan as shocked as she had been when he had apologized to her, before asking him what he wanted. That was when he had finally explained that he had meant what he had said when he had told her he had needed her help. Apparently Nathan Scott, star basketball player of the Tree Hill Raven's, most popular boy inside and outside the halls of Tree Hill High School, Dan Scott's prodige, the Scott brother that would definitely make it to the NBA…..had been in jeopardy of losing his position on the basketball team, and his purpose in life, due to the fact that he had been failing every one of his classes.

Of course it hadn't been the first time Nathan had been in jeopardy of getting kicked off the team. Not only had he failed classes in the past, but he had also gotten himself into some pretty bad situations, the worst of which was stealing a school bus after one of the basketball games and joyriding it all the way to a party he had thrown at the Scott's beach house. But no matter how many times he had gotten into trouble he had never actually gotten thrown off the basketball team, as Dan would always pull some strings to make sure nothing as drastic as that would happen. As a professional basketball player and Tree Hill's leading businessman, people were quick to do favors for Dan Scott, and Nathan had always benefited as a result. However, during Nathan's junior year, the high school hired a new coach, Brian "Whitey" Durham, which put all that Nathan and Dan had worked for in jeopardy.

Whitey Durham had been a coach of high reputation leading several high school basketball teams to their state championships. It was for this reason that Dan, as well as other parents of the Tree Hill Ravens had sought Whitey out. However, hiring Whitey to coach at Tree Hill High became an ironic twist of fate for many of the parents, became the same man they had sought out to help their sons make it in basketball, was the same man who threatened that very goal. Threatened that goal by making it a rule that every basketball player that played for him, had to maintain a B average in every class in order to qualify to play.

Of course Whitey had the players' interests at heart when he mandated his rule. He wanted his players to succeed in every way, both on and off the court. However, many of the parents didn't see it that way especially Dan who went on a crusade to get Whitey Durham fired. But to everyone's shock, including Dan himself, Principal Turner and the school board refused to get rid of Whitey. Turner and the school board had thought that Whitey's policy was a positive way to keep students on track academically. That and Turner as well as the school board had gotten sick of Dan Scott dictating what they could and couldn't do. As a result Whitey stayed, giving Nathan no choice but to work on getting his grades up. He hadn't been happy of course, had given Whitey a hard time, but Whitey Durham wasn't someone to be trifled with. About two weeks into Nathan acting like a prima donna on and off the court to no avail, he had come to her looking for help. And she had said no. A resounding no. A "hell no."

As much as she had felt bad for laughing at Nathan when he had sought her help, she hadn't been about to take on the task of tutoring someone that absolutely pushed her buttons. She had cherished her sanity back then. Really she had. Of course Nathan had been undeterred, immediately trying to butter her up. He had broken out the charm he had often used back then with the girls in their high school. As the high school's leading basketball player, popular, good looking, and charming, it had been rather easy for Nathan to get any girl to do what he had wanted. Not her. Hell no. She had know Nathan practically all her life, and his blunder and bullshit didn't mean a damn thing to her, which was exactly what she had told him. He had smirked at her in response to her rant, had gone as far as to put his hand on her shoulder as a means to win her over, and she responded by swiftly smacking his hand away, before once again telling him no, saying specifically that hell would freeze over before she ever tutored him.

He had left the Tutor Room after that. In a rage to be exact, complete with him slamming the Tutor Center door closed, leaving her to assume that his crazy notion that she would want to help tutor him had died.

But it hadn't. As stubborn and determined as she had been to not to help him, he had been just as stubborn, just as determined, if not more, to get her to do just that.

He pulled out the big guns of course. Hours later as she had worked a shift at Karen's Cafe, she had found herself pleased to look up from refilling some salt and pepper shakers, to see Lucas walk into the cafe. It had been pretty uncommon for him to visit so early on a school day, as he was usually at basketball practice. As he took a stool in front of the cafe's main counter, she had immediately poured him some coffee and plated him a slice of his favorite pie, immediately wanting to take both items back when he had finally confessed that the reason he had come to visit her was for Nathan's sake.

Nathan's sake. She had laughed at that, before telling Lucas a resolute no, knowing that Nathan had sent Lucas to talk to her in order to persuade her to tutor him. Even though the two brothers could fight, fists and all, they loved one another deeply, a bond similar to the one she had with her own siblings. Lucas would do anything for Nathan, and vice versa. So when she said no to Lucas' request to help his big brother, she had known immediately that she had let Lucas down. She had seen the shock on Lucas' face in reaction to her statement, the disappointment, and for a moment she had once again felt guilty for her response to the idea of helping Nathan. It wasn't in her nature to turn people down when they asked for her help. It was one of the main reasons she had become a tutor in the first place. She had wanted to help people, wanted the chance to show a person that they were capable, that they could do even what seemed impossible.

But with Nathan…...it was so hard to want to help him, which was what she had explained to Lucas. She told him that it was difficult enough for her to be around Nathan without wanting to strangle him. She hadn't been able to imagine what it would be like to sit with him for hours on end tutoring him.

Lucas had tried just a little more to persuade her before giving up, throwing out an excuse that he had to meet Skillz down at the River Court.

That was when she had gotten pissed at Nathan. Really pissed. Not only had he not taken no for an answer, he had to sent his brother, her best friend, to do his dirty work. She would do anything for Lucas Scott, a belief she had stood by since she was a child. But she had let him down, the disappointment radiating from his eyes, and it had been all because of Nathan. Nathan freaking Scott.

She had been so pissed at Nathan that as she returned to the task of refilling the cafe's salt and pepper shakers, she had been banging things around….loudly. So loud that Karen intervened, a smile on her face as she did so. That was when she had prepared herself. Prepared herself for what she thought was inevitable. Karen was after all Nathan's mother, and she had been around both of them enough to know how much Karen loved her son. So she had assumed Karen would naturally ask her to help Nathan.

But she hadn't. In fact, all Karen had said was that things were going to be okay.

She remembered taking in those words, the soft smile on Karen's face, and feeling her anger and annoyance diminish. It was then that she explained to Karen all that had occurred that day, how she had felt when Nathan had asked her to tutor him, how she didn't want to do so, how she couldn't help but feel that he didn't deserve the help, but that she didn't want to let anyone down, especially Lucas. By then she had been on the brink of tears, doing her best to hold them back as she told Karen that she had been struggling with the fact that while she didn't want to help Nathan, so much of her felt so wrong for turning away someone who not only needed help, but had sought her out for assistance. When she had finally stopped talking, a sad sigh emitting from her lips, Karen had just smiled at her once again, the smile that had often calmed her during, before she had told her that things would be okay, that she would find a way to do the right thing.

And she had. An hour after her shift at the cafe, a hour during which she had gone back and forth over what she should do, cursing Nathan over and over again, cursing herself, she had walked over to the Scott's house to talk to Nathan.

She had been taken aback when she had knocked on the door and Nathan himself had answered it. She had thought she would have a few minutes to prepare herself, her steadfastness fading quite quickly as Nathan looked back at her.

There had been shock written on his face when she told him that she had wanted to speak to him and she had immediately figured out that Lucas had told him that his mission to get her to help him had failed. It was the shock on Nathan's face that had helped her find her voice and hold her ground.

Before Nathan could even talk she told him that she would tutor him under the condition that he would take it seriously. She explained to him that tutoring meant a lot to her and that if he thought he was going to blow off their sessions or her, like he did with his classes or most things in his life, he would have to find another tutor.

She had rambled her mandate so quickly, that when Nathan had said nothing after she had finished, she had been sure he hadn't understood what she had said. That or he hand't cared. But finally he had slowly smiled at her, before simply saying, "fine."

At first she had looked him up and down, seriously contemplating if he was truly messing with her. He had been smiling after all and Nathan Scott never smiled, especially not when it came to her. But as she took him in, to her shock she had been able to tell that he had been sincere. Not just because of the soft smile that had been playing on his lips…..but the look in his eyes. His blue eyes. Deep and dark like the ocean, crystal clear and striking, yet soft, always full of emotion. She remembered just taking in his eyes that night as she stood on the Scott's porch, feeling herself get lost in them, in the blue, in the emotions that emitted from them, before she was snapped back to reality when Nathan had said her name.

At that she had shook her head at him, asked him what he had been saying, rolling her eyes at him when he explained that he had been trying to set up a day and time to meet for tutoring, when she had "totally been gone on him." She of course quickly denied the fact, telling him to shut up and wipe the stupid smirk off his face.

Gone on Nathan Scott. That had been a preposterous idea. Insane.

She had told Nathan that they would meet the next morning, six o'clock sharp down at the docks, which of course Nathan objected to as they would be meeting on a Saturday morning. Sighing at his whining, she had explained to him that early Saturday morning was the only time when she was free, take her or leave her. In response, he had smirked at her once again, slowly, confidently, looking her up and down before telling her that he would take her.

At that she had done something she had never done. She had given him the finger, smiling with satisfaction when he looked back at her with shock. Definitely not her normal behavior, but it was either that or smacking Nathan in the face.

God he had been such a leech.

Satisfied with their conversation she had told him she would see him bright eyed and bushy tailed the next morning, walking down the Scott's driveway as she did so. But before she had walked very far, Nathan had gotten in the last word.

To her shock he hadn't said anything hurtful or scathing. Instead Nathan had just said a simple thank you, smiling at her before giving her a nod, and returning to the Scott's house.

She could still remember smiling to herself at that, knowing Nathan very rarely thanked people. Standing feet away from him in the Scott's driveway, the dark night surrounding them, she had once again seen the sincerity in Nathan's eyes…...and it had made her smile.

Of course he had a poor way of showing his thankfulness their first tutoring session. As she had anticipated, Nathan had turned up an hour late to the docks, a big ass grin on his face. That was when she had finally done what she had wanted to do since he had asked her to tutor him. She had smacked him.

She didn't smack him in his face, although it was quite the fight not do so. Instead she gave him a quick, but hard smack on his arm, before telling him he was late. He feigned hurt of course, saying that she was so mean to him even when he had gone out of his way to bring her a coffee, which he swiftly placed in front of her on the picnic table they had been sitting at. It had been a sweet gesture, she had admitted that much to herself, but she had been pissed off, telling him that she wasn't a fan of coffee and preferred tea. That was when Nathan had gotten annoyed, stating that he couldn't win with her, that he never could. Shaking her head at him she told him that he had never tried winning with her, that he had always made her life miserable, and that he was only adding to that by being late. Even in high school she had taken on so many things in her life. Between school, tutoring, working at the cafe, volunteering at a call center and a youth outreach program, she was constantly busy with little free time. When she had set up Nathan's tutoring session for that Saturday morning, it had truly been because she had no other time to help him. But of course Nathan had thrown that back in her face, treating her as if she didn't matter.

When Nathan had apologized, she swiftly brushed it away, telling him she didn't need his apologies, but needed him to take what they were doing seriously. She went as far as to tell him that even though he was Nathan Scott star basketball player of the Tree Hill Ravens, she didn't give a damn, and neither did the courses that he was taking and failing. She had been in such a rage and had expected him to be in one too after what she had said to him, but he hadn't been. To her shock, Nathan once again had said he was sorry, that he was serious about needing help, but that he had only wanted to push her buttons by showing up late because she was "so damn uptight."

At that she had done something unexpected. She had laughed. Loudly, profusely, without any inhibitions. She still remembered thinking back then, that the laughter had probably erupted out of her because she had been tired or her emotions had come to a boil. Whatever the reason, she had laughed and laughed, it increasing when Nathan joined her. The only difference was that his laugh had been a nervous laugh, probably scared she would smack him again. She hadn't exactly been happy with Nathan telling her that she was uptight, but then again she had known it was fairly true, especially in comparison to Nathan. They had been complete opposites of one another, both finding importance and joy in so many different things. She had gone through life taking things, okay taking everything, seriously while Nathan had looked at life as one big party.

It had been then that she had realized that maybe she was being too tough on Nathan. She hadn't been about to admit that to him, hell no, but she had told herself that the fact that Nathan had made a few mistakes didn't mean that he didn't deserve compassion or help.

She accepted his apology, apologized to him as well, before telling him that she would try to be "less uptight" when it came to tutoring him. Nathan in turn promised not to be such a "prick," to which she laughed once more, Nathan joining in with her again. When their laugher had died down, and she took in the smile Nathan had given her, sincere, genuine, she had remembered telling herself that they would be fine. That they didn't need to be friends, that they didn't need to get along, they just needed to keep things pleasant enough in order for their tutoring sessions to work.

Oh how things changed.

To her shock, as the weeks progressed their tutoring sessions actually did go smoothly, hell more than smoothly. Although Nathan had been notorious for blowing off school work or anything to do with academics, he had really tried his best during their sessions. It hadn't been exactly easy for him, and there had been many times when he had gotten frustrated and annoyed, but he continued to strive and had really made great strides.

She remembered being so proud of him.

Of course pride had been a typical feeling she experienced when someone she was tutoring succeeded, but with Nathan she had discovered that the pride she felt for him was a little different. Different because he had really done a complete turnaround in such a short period of time. He had gone from not giving a damn about school to really taking his classes seriously. So serious in fact, that soon enough he was asking her to tutor him more than once a week. Then, twice a week became four times a week, and four times a week became practically every day.

It had been somewhat of a burden for her to be tutoring Nathan so much as she had to find a way to balance Nathan and all of her other commitments, but she hadn't been able to turn him down. Not just because she had promised to help him, not just because she found a happiness in helping him, not just because he had asked her…..but because she and Nathan had become friends.

It had happened quite naturally, quite quickly, ironic since fighting and being at one another's throats had shaped their relationship for so many years. But the more time they spent together, the better their relationship became.

It had been the tutoring of course. At first their time together had been just strictly that, tutoring. She had always taken her tutoring sessions seriously, and Nathan hadn't been the exception. What that meant was the hour or two they had spent together was devoted to learning and nothing more. However, that began to falter and then collapse, as time had progressed. Their discussions began to leave the parameters of books, math equations, historical events, and scientific formulas and instead turned into discussions of everything and anything.

Initially, most of their conversations were just small talk. What Nathan planned to do that weekend, what new movie she and Lucas were going to see, what joint family vacation their parents wanted to go on for the summer. But soon their small talk turned into real conversations. Not just conversation that passed between two people who were acquaintances, two people forced together because of a circumstance, but rather conversations held between two people who trusted one another, respected one another…...cared about one another.

However, things took a real turning point one day during one of their sessions.

She could still remember that day. Quite vividly as a matter of fact. It had been three months into their tutoring sessions, a point at which she and Nathan weren't completely friends, but were getting along. During one of their scheduled tutoring sessions, Nathan had turned up about forty-five minutes late, literally running into the Tutor Center before abruptly sitting in his chair across from her at their usual table.

She had been about to lay into him for being late, when she had realized quite quickly that he had been upset.

It had taken her aback. It was rare to see Nathan upset, very rare, and the extent at which he had been upset that day had never been to a degree that she had witnessed before.

At first she had told herself to ignore it, telling herself it was none of her business, and that if he wanted it to be he would tell her. However, after an unsuccessful attempt at going over one of Nathan's assignments for school, she couldn't help but ask if he was okay. Not just because he looked so upset, but because she had felt herself grow worried about him by the second.

He of course, initially tried to play it off, brushing off her concern by saying that he was fine. But when she gave him a look of skepticism, he finally confessed what had been plaguing him.

Apparently on his way to their tutoring session he had run into his father. Dan had come home early from work, stating he had done so, so that he and Nathan could do some training for the Raven's latest basketball game. Since Nathan had a tutoring session with her, he had told his father he couldn't train with him, to which Dan responded by going off on a rant, saying that Nathan didn't take basketball seriously, that he had never taken basketball or anything for that matter seriously, and that he was never going to succeed, most surely not like Dan Scott had.

She had been shocked by what Nathan had told her. Shocked. She had been aware for some time that Nathan and Dan weren't exactly warm with one another, but that was the first time she had gotten a true understanding of the kind of relationship they had.

She remembered feeling her heart break as Nathan continued talking about the pressures his father put on him, about Dan constantly telling him that he was weak, that he didn't try enough…..that he was nothing. He had explained that as the oldest son, Dan expected him to be the perfect reflection of him, the pressure of that sometimes making him feel as if he would suffocate. Nathan had stated that he loved basketball, that it was the one thing he was good at, the one thing that made him feel good, but that his Dad's treatment sometimes made the game he loved so much, become a complete nightmare.

Not knowing the right thing to do or to say at that point, she had done the only thing she could do, which was try to take Nathan's mind off of things.

She had told him that for the day they were going to blow off tutoring and instead do something fun.

Nathan of course had looked at her in shock, before laughing, pointing out that blowing off tutoring was supposed to be his thing. She had smiled at him, told him that it wasn't true, that he had put so much effort into succeeding in tutoring, had been flourishing, and therefore deserved a break.

She could remember him smiling at her, his genuine smile, the smile he only used on occasion, the smile that at that point he had directed at her rather often, before saying, 'okay'.

Hours later they had found themselves down at the Scott's beach house. As they sat out on the sand watching the waves of the ocean crash over one another, she and Nathan had talked.

Mainly it had been Nathan talking, him laying out his relationship with Dan, with Karen, with Lucas, but she had talked as well about the things that plagued her, bothered her. She hadn't planned to. She and Nathan getting away, escaping, had been for him, to allow him to gain some peace of mind. She hadn't want to inhibit that by laying out her own problems. But most of all she hadn't planned to talk about herself, because back then it had been hard for her to share certain things. Not just with Nathan, but with most people. The things that made her sad, made her scared, made her doubt herself….those things she had usually kept hidden within her heart, on the rare occasion confessing them to Lucas when they became a heavy burden on her.

But sitting out on the beach that day, the sun over them shining brightly, the deep blue waves of the ocean crashing over one another, frothing, the sound humming like a melody, the warm sand playing at her feet, the delicacy of the grains feeling as though they were floating against her skin.….she had felt a sense of peace, a sense of comfort, a sense of serenity that made her feel…..safe.

For the most part, when Nathan had talked about what he had to deal with he had looked out in front of him, towards the beach, almost as if he was mesmerized by the crashing waves of the water. Sometimes looking back, as she often did to that day, she always thought to herself that maybe he had just been mesmerized by the world that laid beyond, mesmerized by thoughts that one day what was weighing on his heart would all be a distant memory. But when she had talked to him, when she had confessed the things she sometimes had trouble confessing to herself, he would turn to look at her.

It had been why it had felt so easy to talk to him. When she had looked back at him, looked into his intense blue eyes, the eyes that had often been so full of emotion, passionate and fierce, and yet at times soft, gentle, she had known that he was looking at her, really and truly looking at her. She remembered at points during that day, feeling off balance from him looking at her so intensely, looking so deeply within her. No one had ever looked at her like that. No one. But most of all, when he looked at her the way he had, she had felt safe. Safe because in his eyes, his deep dark blue eyes, she didn't see any judgement, disgust, or pity, she saw understanding, care…..concern.

That day they had been the only two people on the beach, no one visiting since it had been a pretty dreary day, storm clouds threatening to erupt at any moment. But even had people been there, going about their business, playing in the water, walking along the shore, with the way Nathan had looked at her that day…..she had known that she would have still gotten that feeling that it was just them. Just she and Nathan.

She had gotten lost in that, lost in that realization, in the feelings it conjured up, in the feelings that had been within her for weeks at that point, only snapping out of it, when it had suddenly began raining.

She had quickly stood up, scooping up the blanket that she and Nathan had brought with them down to the beach, before Nathan had grabbed it from her and thrown it back down onto the sand. At first she had laughed, confused by his behavior, telling him they needed to get inside before the both of them got soaked and more than likely sick. However, her laughter turned into a shocked scream, when Nathan had swiftly thrown her over his shoulder, before heading down the beach. Quickly realizing what Nathan had planned to do, she had threatened to kick his ass, it falling on deaf ears as Nathan ran them into the water, going far enough so that the dark blue waves were at his waist. When he brought her to his eye level and smirked at her, she threatened him one more time, pointing her finger at him and giving him a glare. But her threats once again fell on deaf ears, as Nathan plopped her unceremoniously into the water. When she resurfaced she had been about to give him his last rites, before she saw the amusement in his eyes, a sense of happiness within him that she hadn't seen for so long. She remembered just taking it all in, the glint in his eyes, the smile on his face, the happiness radiating from him…...and she had felt happy too. Granted she had been soaking wet and freezing due to the ocean water and the rain that had been pouring down on them, but she had been happy. To see Nathan feel so free, to feel that herself, to be able to share the moment with him…...she had felt alive.

After horsing around awhile in the water, they had finally headed back to the beach house to warm up. They both had dried off and changed into some of Nathan's old clothes stored at the beach house, before relaxing on the couch. She could remember the minute Nathan turned on the television, a fight breaking out between them over what they would watch. But it hadn't been like the fights they had in the past as children, both of them saying such hurtful things to one another, trying to hurt the other person. Instead, it had been bantering, and she could remember not helping but smile at the fact that although her and Nathan's relationship had changed, they were still themselves, could still be themselves around one another. They had no problem challenging one another, that their arguing could bring out an energy within the other. To her shock she had won out, Nathan conceding to her. He had told her that he had simply done so since nothing good was on Sports Center at the time, but she knew as she had known then, that he had let her win. That he had been trying to do something kind for her.

Kindness quickly became such an integral part of their friendship, a friendship that became very important to the both of them as time progressed. Growing up Lucas had been the closet person to her, the person she could be herself around, the person she could laugh with, feel happy with, the person she could run to when life got hard, the person she knew would always protect her, would care for her as fiercely as she cared for him. But soon, Nathan had become that person too. The person she could go to and know without a shadow of a doubt that he would be there for her. The same way she was there for him. But it was more than that.

Nathan pushed her in a way that no one else had ever done. Of course that had always been a facet of their relationship, Nathan being able to push her buttons, to get her angry, to make her lash out like no one ever could. But once they were friends it became more than that, much more. Nathan pushed her to be the person she thought she could never be. Her life had been dictated so much back then by expectations, demands, rules, much of which she had placed upon herself. So much of that became who she was. Someone who did exactly what they thought they should do, be the way they thought they should be. Someone who followed the rules to the degree, never stepping out of line, never.

Nathan pushed her out of that mentality. He made her feel carefree in a way she had never experienced. He made her see that she didn't need to meet the expectations she thought she had to meet. He taught her that she could be herself, pushed her to find out who that was, even if it meant stepping out of the neat little box she had placed herself within. He encouraged her to be her, to be Haley. He let her know that being Haley, klutzy, opinionated, passionate, sometimes zany Haley, was more than okay.

He had made her feel okay with herself, and at the time when high school had been so hard for her, when she felt the judgement of people breaking through the shell she had created to protect herself, his support had meant everything to her.

He meant everything to her. The way he could make her laugh, the way he encouraged her, the way he supported her…..he meant the world to her. Nathan Scott, her friend, her best friend. As their friendship quickly blossomed, it hadn't been hard to see why.

It had been because of Nathan, because of the person he was.

For so many years, she had thought that Nathan was horrible, had no heart, cruel and dark to the core. She remembered thinking so many times, how Nathan and Lucas could be brothers, because she had never known Lucas not to be kind and loving. She had accepted that the two brothers were polar opposites, the notion of that helping her to justify why she could be so close to Lucas, love him so fiercely, and yet despise his older brother. But she had quickly realized as her friendship with Nathan developed, that the way she viewed Nathan had been so wrong. So wrong.

Of course Nathan had been perfect. Even after they became friends, she was more than aware of that. But getting to know Nathan, spending time with him, learning more and more about the person he truly was, the person he let her see….she quickly realized how similar Nathan and Lucas truly were. That Nathan wasn't horrible, cruel, and dark to the core. He had a heart. Of course he hid that, quite expertly so, behind the blunder and B.S., behind a calculated smirk, and nonchalance that showed everyone around him that he didn't care about them, about anyone. But it wasn't true. Nathan cared. He cared.

Behind the facade of being a local God, Dan Scott's son, Lucas Scott's older brother, he was Nathan. Just Nathan. Kind, warm, loving Nathan.

It had been shocking to say the least, for her to discover the heart that Nathan had. But it was big. Big, in the way he respected his mother in everything that she did. Big, in the way that he protected his little brother, helped him in any way that he could, Big, in the way that he stood up to his father, trying to make him see how truly passionate he was about the game.

He was inspiring, not just in the dedication he gave to basketball, but the dedication he began giving his studies, seeking out ways to become a better student.

He was staggering, in the way he held himself with such confidence, in the way he could be so sure of himself, and then in the next moment have doubts, question who he was, wonder what he could be. Nathan was secretive, protective of himself. Even after they became friends, the Nathan he allowed her to see, still was not that Nathan he allowed the world to see, but she was enthralled by that. Captivated by the way he fought with himself to meet people's expectations, while hiding on to who he truly was. Captivated by the way he could take on the persona of Nathan Scott, but then joke with her about the way people treated him like the second coming. Captivated by the way he could be so open with her, show her his heart, and then close it off to others.

She fell in love with that. She fell in love….with him.

God it had been so shocking to her. So shocking.

Boys hand't exactly been something she had occupied her time with, ironic since most of her time had been spent with boys. Lucas, Junk, Mouth, Skillz, Fergie, Nathan. She had boys in her life, many boys, but unlike girl's her age, she hadn't swooned at a good looking boy, hadn't thought about her next boyfriend, or dream about her future wedding. To her, none of those thoughts were worth anything, when she had goals, aspirations.

Of course she had a pulse, she was a teenager for God's sake. She was aware of the opposite sex, had a few crushes, had been attracted to a boy here or there, but she didn't spent her time romanticizing about boys.

That all changed with Nathan. She fell for him and fell for him hard. So much so that she had been blindsided by the way she truly felt about him.

They had been out one night walking along the dock of the Tree HIll Marina. Nathan and she had just finished up dinner and a movie, a movie they had been chatting about for an hour. She remembered Nathan abruptly stopping what he was saying, before pulling her quickly over to the the railing of the dock, positioning their bodies so they were looking out onto the water.

She remembered laughing, asking Nathan what his actions had been about, taking in the smile he gave her, before he shrugged and looked out onto the water.

She had been bit concerned, especially since she had felt Nathan a little off that entire day, but she had decided not to push him on it, knowing that when he was ready he would talk to her.

It was a little routine they had. Nathan would come to tutoring upset or angry and she would start the session knowing that at some point he would reveal what was eating at him. They would be hanging out in his room Nathan not saying a word to her, entranced by something on Sports Center or his latest game of NBA live, and finally tell her the latest thing Dan had done to him. They would be at the latest party Skillz, Lucas, and Nathan had decided to drag her to, Nathan off doing his own thing, before she would suddenly see him in a sea of people, before he gave her a nod, signing that she should meet him somewhere to talk.

Nathan had always told her that she had a way of making him feel comfortable, of comforting him. That his day would be shitty, that the latest thing that Dan said to him would put him in a foul mood, that he would find himself pissed off at the world, and then he would find her, would know that she would listen to him, and he would find himself talking to her, taking in the comfort that she always gave him.

So they had just stood there for a couple of minutes, trying to give him comfort, neither of them saying anything, she taking in the silence, Nathan taking in the water ahead of him, before he began telling her about how he been approached earlier that day at the high school by a sport's recruiter from Oak Lake Academy.

At first she had been confused, completely in the dark about what he was talking about, before he explained that Oak Lake Academy was a private school in Charlotte. It not only had a high reputation for academics, but also for its sports teams, most of the school's student athletes getting recruited by top colleges and universities. Oak Lake had approached him that morning wanting him to finish out his junior and then senior year at the school.

She remembered being shocked, not knowing what to say, before she had immediately felt her heart drop as Nathan's words began to wash over her.

Nathan was leaving.

She remembered letting out a small gasp at that realization, stunned when Nathan turned to look at her, and she saw so many emotions swirling in his eyes. She could see that he was torn, conflicted….scared, and while so much of her wanted to tell him right away not to go, not leave, she hadn't said a word. She just listened, listened to him like she always did, listened to him like she knew he had needed.

He went on to explain that he had immediately left school and had headed over to Karen's cafe, only to find his mother and father in a heated argument. It was then that he discovered that the sport's recruiter hadn't showed up on a whim. He had showed up because Dan had called the school.

Apparently at that point, Dan had had enough of Whitey. Seeing that the school was doing nothing to curb Whitey, Dan had decided to take action himself. With his connections and his reputation, along with Nathan's talent, he was able to get Nathan in to the academy with no problem. All Dan had needed was Karen's agreement.

Nathan said he had felt so angry, so upset, so betrayed in that moment as he heard his father speak. But that hadn't even compared to what Karen had voiced she felt. She had been beyond angry and upset that Dan hadn't even told her anything about what he had been plotting, betrayed that he would take so many actions in deciding their son's future without even letting her know. Dan had became angry at Karen's accusations, accusing her of not caring about their son's future, about not being able to understand how important it was for Nathan to go to Oak Lake, where he could be a big fish in a big pond, Dan explained that if Nathan went to Oak Lake he would be able to show recruiters that he was a Scott in every way, a high caliber player, which would never happened if Nathan stayed in Tree Hill.

That was when the fight between Karen and Dan got really bad, only stopping when Nathan had taken a glass off a nearby table and threw it against the wall that was adjacent to him.

He had told her, that both of his parents had been stunned, Karen crying a little. But he hadn't cared, telling them in anger that no one had bothered to ask him how he felt, what he wanted. Karen of course had reassured him that she did, had rushed over to comfort him, but Dan began to tear into him, telling him that he didn't know what he wanted, that he was too stupid to know, and that Nathan had better start listening to him before he completely, 'fucked up his future.' Nathan had said he flew into a rage after that, telling his father that he had never loved or cared about him, that him shipping him off to another school showed that quite clearly, and that he wasn't going. His mother again tried to reassure him, folding him into her embrace, but he had pulled away from her, telling his father to 'fuck off,' before leaving the cafe quickly.

She remembered being stunned once again listening to Nathan's story. Stunned at what Dan had said to Karen and to Nathan, stunned at the situation. But she kept listening, not saying a word, knowing that it was what Nathan needed. That so much of his life he had been told how to act, how to feel, how to be, primarily by Dan, and all he wanted, all he needed, was someone to just listen to him.

He had explained that he just walked around town after the confrontation with Dan and Karen, which had explained why she hadn't seen him in the hallways at school or at lunch which they usually spent together with Lucas and Mouth. He said he hadn't been able to go back to school, needing space from everyone and everything to clear his mind.

He had said he was angry. Angry at Dan for dictating his life, the way he had always dictated it. Angry at his mother for not standing up more for him, the way he felt she should. Angry at himself for being so weak, for not being strong enough.

That was when she had spoken up, telling Nathan immediately that he wasn't weak. That he was just shocked and confused, and that it was okay to feel that way. He pointed out that his father would disagree with that, and she responded quickly by saying 'screw Dan Scott, he doesn't know everything.'

She remembered him giving her a look of shock, but also a look of pride at being so candid. He asked her how she could be so strong. She smiled, before telling him that she had learned to be strong from him. That he made her strong, that she saw his strength everyday.

He had nodded at her, giving her a small smile before looking out ahead of him, looking at the water once again.

They had stood once more in silence, before Nathan broke it again, saying that his Dad wanted him to go. That Dan Scott always got what he wanted. She responded by saying once again, 'screw Dan Scott,' before asking Nathan what he wanted. She remembered him turning to her, shock once again in his eyes. But it had been more than just shock swirling in his eyes.

She had found it difficult to discern the emotions swimming within his eyes, but she had seen the intensity in them, had felt it. It was like he was taking her in, trying to see her, more than he had tried to see her in past couple of months of their blooming friendship. It had caused her to feel off kilter.

She felt herself lost, both of them lost in their own little world, before he broke the silence by telling her that he didn't want to leave. That he couldn't leave.

She had smiled softly at that, though taken aback, asking him why not.

She remembered shaking her head at herself. She had wanted Nathan to get everything that he deserved, everything that life could offer to him. Nathan worked hard, strove like no one she had ever seen, was the type of talent that was so rare to find. But it was more than that. He was dedicated, he put his heart and soul into everything he did, and she truly believed that he deserved to be successful in anything. So if going to Oak Lake meant he would succeed, she had known she would be okay with that.

However, she hadn't been okay with him leaving. Not in the slightest. The minute he had told her about Oak Lake, the minute she had heard about Dan Scott's involvement, she had felt like her whole world was crashing in. The thought of Nathan not being around, the thought of losing him….God her heart had truly sunk. Nathan had become such an integral part of her life that she hadn't been able to fathom that not always being the case.

But God her heart had lurched at her questioning of why he didn't want to leave. She remembered the feeling of it being so staggering that she hadn't heard what Nathan was saying to her, hadn't realized Nathan had been talking about the reasons for why he wanted to stay, until he said her name.

She had looked up at him, had seen slight amusement in his eyes, before he began repeating what he had said. Repeating the fact that Tree Hill was his home, that he had lived in Charlotte before and had been completely miserable. He told her that in Tree Hill he had found a sense that he could be happy. He explained the fact that he couldn't leave his team, his brothers, and although Whitey drove him absolutely crazy, 'he couldn't leave the old man either.' Dan may have taught him how to play basketball, but Nathan told her that Whitey was the one who had taught him the true meaning of the game. That the game wasn't just about him, about his stats, about winning the next game, or far away State Championships. It was about working with the team, about growing as a player, about finding the peace, the grace, the beauty of playing the game. He would lose that, he had been sure of it. He told her that he couldn't leave his mother and he sure as hell couldn't leave his brother. He explained the fact that while Dan was hard on both he and Lucas, he was the worst to Nathan, a fact she was more than aware of. He explained his fears that once he was gone, Lucas would take his spot as being the target for Dan's judgement, abuse, and cruelty. He said he couldn't let that happen to his brother, that he wouldn't. That he would take on Dan, that he had taken on Dan all his life, knowing that it would protect his brother.

She remembered smiling at that. Though it broke her heart to know about the way Dan treated his sons, especially Nathan, she couldn't help but be reminded at the moment once again of the heart that Nathan had. She had placed her hand on his upper back at that, leaning her head on his shoulder, just taking him in, taking it all in. However, she broke out of that when Nathan confessed that he also couldn't leave her.

That had really shocked her.

_I can't leave you Hales. The thought of not seeing you, of not being able to talk to you…...I just….God I can't leave you Hales. _

She had felt herself tear up at that, a tear slipping past her eye. She could remember quickly wiping it away, before she felt him suddenly fold her in his arms. He held on to her tightly, so tightly her mind had wondered how she could breathe. But she had felt fine, in his arms, in his embrace. She had felt perfect. She had cried a little more, embarrassed at her display. She wasn't a crier, something she always had prided herself on. But she couldn't stop the tears, hadn't wanted to, given the situation. So she had buried her head into Nathan's chest wrapping her arms around her back, as she felt his hands begin to rub her own. She had known he was trying to give her comfort, some ease, and she hadn't been able to stop herself from laughing a little at herself. Nathan had his world turned upside down in a span of a day and he had been the one comforting her. It should have been other way around she had told herself. But she hadn't been able to stop herself, hadn't wanted to break the moment. She had taken him in, the way he had smelled, the way he had felt, and losing herself in the feeling of being in his embrace.

They had hugged before of course. Numerous times. But that day on the docks as he held her in his embrace, their bodies pressed tightly together, so perfectly so….it had been different.

Both of them grasping on to one another, both of them holding on to each other, of what was them, of what they had. It was different. He had whispered to her all the reasons why he didn't want to leave her, why he couldn't, and while it was a little hard hearing what he had said, she had listened to all of it. Had know that he was whispering so it was only she that heard the way he felt about her, about them, about their friendship.

When he had finished he had kissed the side of her forehead, asking her to say something, say anything. It had taken her awhile to do so, a lump of emotion in her throat, threatening to spill more tears. But she had pushed through telling him that while she didn't want him to go, that she would miss him like crazy, that if he did go he better plan on getting unlimited minutes on his phone, she would support him in whatever he decided.

He had kissed her again on her forehead, thanking her, telling her that he needed that, her support, that it meant everything to him, before reiterating that he couldn't go, that he wasn't going to go.

She had smiled at that. A wide, big, happy smile that she could feel throughout her body, one that matched his own, before joking that she was glad he decided to stay because if he had decided to go she may have had to maim Dan Scott. They had laughed at that, full bellied laughs, before Nathan grew serious and whispered 'thank you, Hales,' tucking a strand of her hair that was blowing due to wind, behind her ear.

That was when she knew. When she had no doubts, no reservations, no questions.

She had fallen in love with Nathan Scott. In that simple action, in his words, in the intense look in his eyes, she had known how deeply her heart felt for Nathan. She had also been aware of the fact that her feelings for him, her love for him had been brewing for a long time. That once hidden by the anger and hatred she felt for him, her feeling began to change as they became close, hitting her that day down in the Marina, when she had almost lost him, when she had realized that part of why he was staying was for her. In the softness of his touch, in the feel of his lips on her skin, in the intense look in his eyes….she knew he had sited for her and God she had loved him for that. She had been in love with Nathan. Madly.

But she didn't do anything about it. Not that day or the day after that or the day after that. She kept silent.

It had been hard. God had been hard. Every minute she spent with Nathan she felt more and more for him, and it became all the more harder to not confess to him the way she felt. The way he smiled at her, those secret smiles he saved for her. The way he would joke around with her, smirking in a way that would partially piss her off, partially make her swoon. The way he would seek her out, just to talk to her or be around her. It had been so damn hard not to tell him she loved him. God it had been so hard. But what was harder, the reality of what would happen if she did.

She was always an optimistic person. She wasn't naive of course. She didn't see the world through rose colored glasses. Yet she always found herself looking at the bright side of things. As her mother always said, 'when life hands you lemons, you can make a mean lemon martini Haley-Bob.' Yet she was also a realist, someone who when making a decision, whether big or small, looked a the reality of the situation, the reality of the circumstance, the reality of the consequences. She weighed the pros and cons of everything. What would happen if she did this, what would happen if she didn't do that. It was sometimes suffocating, part of the reason why she stayed in line so much throughout her life. But it was who she was. Even at sixteen years old. Loving Nathan wasn't the problem. It was so easy. It just was. One look from him and she knew how she felt, no reservations. But pursuing that, pursuing the way she felt, that to her was the problem.

Her friendship with Nathan had been so right, so perfect it had sometimes boggled her mind to think back to the years they had been at each other throats. Although the friendship came quickly, was still new in so many ways, she hadn't been able, couldn't imagine living without his friendship. That's why among many other reasons the threat of Nathan going to Oak Lake had been so devastating for her. She hadn't been joking about him having to get more minutes on his phone, because had he decided to leave she knew they would need to talk to him constantly. But she also knew the reality. That phone calls once a day would turn into phone calls once a week. Nathan would get busy, would get tied up at Oak Lake Academy, in basketball, in preparing for college and she would get tied up with school, tutoring, and volunteering. The communication would dwindle, reduced to awkward phone calls where they try to catch up after weeks, maybe even months of not talking. The friendship would be strained so much so that when Nathan came home to visit, the air between them would be just as strained if not more. The happiness of seeing one another, coupled with the reality that they didn't know one another like they used to, would have made things unbearable.

They were scenarios she had run through her mind, as she and Nathan talked that day down at the Marina, her thoughts leaving her when Nathan had been so adamant about staying in Tree Hill. But those thoughts had not been gone for too long.

The realist in her told her a relationship could never work. The pessimist in her told her that Nathan Scott would never give her the time of day.

Though Nathan had changed in those months their friendship developed, he had still been the same in so many ways. He had still been a basketball God, the most popular student in school, the boy all the girls wanted to be with.

She used to be disgusted by the rumors that would float around about Nathan's latest conquest, the details about his love life, about how he moved from girl to girl. When they became friends it still disgusted her, but she learned to live with it because he was her friend, because it was his life, and if that was how he chose to live it, then that was what she had to accept. But it had been hard seeing the way he acted with girls, knowing he was better than that. The pain she felt however, got worse when she realized that she loved him.

It wasn't because he was with other girls. Of course, that fact didn't exactly thrill her, okay fine she had hated it. It wasn't such a great feeling to be at a party only to find out that Nathan went off with his latest girl. But it more so hurt because seeing him with girl after girl after girl had made her realized how she was so far from what Nathan wanted, that she could never be, would never be, the kind of girl he would want to be with.

She had been Haley James. Bookworm, nerd, tutor-extrodinare. The girls Nathan dated would never be described as such. They were cheerleaders, the popular girls in school, the kind of girls who spent their days in the mall, wore tight shirts, short skirts, and heels to school. She was the practical dresser wearing jeans, t-shirts, sweaters, and sneakers. It had been high school for craps sake, not a fashion runway. She had been inexperienced, not having a boyfriend until college. The girls that Nathan chose…..they were very experienced, knew how to play to what Nathan wanted from a girl. She hadn't been it, and the fear of rejection, of telling Nathan how she felt about him, and hearing him turn her down, or take pity on her, or hell even laugh…..she couldn't put herself through that. She'd seen her sisters lament over their breakups, over this guy or that guy not giving them the time of day, over crushes remaining just that and she hadn't wanted that for herself. Hand't wanted to subject herself to the heartbreak.

So she told herself that what she felt for Nathan was a crush. A strong crush, but a crush nonetheless and instead focused on their friendship. A friendship that to this day still meant the world to her.

It hadn't been easy to keep the friendship going. Often times they had to fight like hell. They had to fight keep it alive when Nathan moved away to attend Duke University, they had to fight to keep it alive when she went even further away to Stanford, and they had to fight to keep it alive through every fight, every tear, every hurdle that they faced. It hadn't been perfect, it sure as hell hadn't always been easy, but it had been everything. Everything.

Haley smiled at the thought, scanning the room once again to see if she could find Nathan in the crowd of partygoers. When she saw no trace of him, she felt her stomach drop.

God their friendship meant meant everything to her, but after what had happened between them last night…...she may have ruined that.

God what was she going to say to him when she saw him? What the hell was he going to say to her.? It had been a long time since they had been nasty with one another. But she knew all too well, that Nathan could get nasty, very nasty, especially when he felt wronged. It made him a great lawyer, and a terrifying adversary. She didn't think she could take seeing the latter tonight. Definitely not.

Feeling her nerves get the best of her, her stomach dropping once again, she took a sip of her wine trying to calm herself down. But she couldn't. Not only was she certain he was mad at her for what happened between them this morning, but she was certain he was also mad at her over the fact that she had been avoiding him all day.

If there was something Nathan hated more than being wronged, it was dealing with someone who refused to deal with him. He hadn't accepted that on the basketball court, he didn't accept that in a court of law, and he sure as hell didn't accept that in his life.

God what had she been thinking?

She hadn't been thinking, which was part of the problem. But she was certainly thinking at this point, that she was a little priss who couldn't deal with her problems.

It wasn't the type of person she usually was, usually dealing with things head one, but today she had made that exception, even going as far as instructing Peyton to tell Nathan she was out of the office if he stopped by.

Stupid, it had been really stupid, which was exactly what Peyton told her, pointing to the fact that not only was Nathan her best friend, they also worked at the same law firm. He would know when she was in her office and he certainly would know that she was avoiding him, avoiding his calls. But she had begged Peyton to do what she had asked, trying to ignore the curiosity on Peyton's face.

This morning she had barely been able to deal with things herself, hence what she did this morning. She sure as hell hadn't been ready to tell Peyton.

"Look at you, gorgeous as ever. Just my luck we're not standing under some mistletoe."

"Well that would certainly get the company fodder going," Haley laughed, as she turned around to see one of the subjects of her thoughts standing before her.

"Well with Johnson singing his ass off and Joe Turner hitting on Julian Baker's new secretary, why not add another topic of conversation to Monday's daily gossip. Good way to bring in the New Year don't you think," Peyton Sawyer stated with a small laugh.

"Ugh I can't believe Joe is hitting on that poor girl. Someone should have warned her that he's a slimeball" Haley stated, laughing when Peyton gave her an eyeroll. "What?" she asked in amusement.

"Poor girl? Haley I know Candy is not the sharpest tool in the shed, but it's pretty hard to miss that Joe Turner is married what with the gold ring he's sporting on his left hand. Oh and let's not forget the _wife_ he brought along with him" Peyton said with a laugh. "And slimeball? I've taught you far worse language than that. You can do better."

"Asshole?" Haley said lowly, ever mindful of the fact that while they were at a party, they were still around her co-workers as well as her bosses.

"Asshole! That's fantastic Hales!" Peyton stated in a rather loud voice, laughing when Haley hit her arm as a few of their co-workers looked over at them in amusement.

"Peyton. Jeez," Haley attempted to admonish, smiling at the people who were looking at them, hoping they would return back to their conversations. She could feel a slight blush start to bloom on her face, as one of her colleagues clearly tried to asses what she and Peyton were talking about.

She let out a little laugh. She was a bit mortified, but more so amused. This is why she loved having Peyton Sawyer in her life. She reminded her that she didn't always have to be serious, a fact that was hard to remember when working in a law firm.

"Oh come on Haley. You think by Monday Johnson and McNamara are going to be worried about you saying asshole? I say one more cup of egg nog and Johnson is going to have to worry about a whole lot more. I think I saw him attempting to strip off his shirt before McNamara stopped him," Peyton stated in delight.

"You're finding joy in this, aren't you? You're terrible," Haley joked, shaking her head in reprimand. "So are the boys. I told them not to put that much rum in the egg nog. Now half the party is drunk," she sighed, though she couldn't help but smile as Peyton let out a small laugh.

"Can I tell you a secret?" Peyton whispered conspiratorially into Haley's ear.

"It depends. Are we walking into Peyton and Jake's sex life secret territory, because then I have to pass. The story you told me about Jenny's conception still haunts me. Talk about party foul of the mental image," Haley joked, watching as Peyton gave her an impressed look.

"Woah ho, ho. Looks like someone other than Johnson broke into the egg nog," Peyton laughed, shaking her head in mock disappointment at Haley. "We're friends Hales, friends share those sorts of things."

"You forget I grew up with Lucas as my best friend. If I told him about my sex life he would probably want to cut off his ears. With you and I, a few details sure. Painting the whole picture? Umm no. I swear I still blush sometimes when I see Jake," Haley stated with laugh, before taking a sip of her wine.

"What about Nathan?" Peyton asked, with a small laugh as Haley coughed a bit.

"Nathan?" Haley stated, coughing again.

Peyton bringing up Nathan had surprised her to say the least, causing her sip of wine to go down a little wrong. She coughed again, trying to clear her throat. Peyton couldn't know about…..no, no. She couldn't. Could she?

"What does Nathan have to do with Jake and your sex life? Want to tell me something?" Haley joked trying to change the subject.

"Do you?" Peyton asked, searching Haley's eyes, giving her a smile.

"Me? No. No. I thought you wanted to tell me something. A secret" Haley said, encouraging Peyton to tell her what she had intended, in an attempt to once again get Peyton off the topic of Nathan.

She was going to tell Peyton. Really she was. God she just didn't know how to.

Growing up she hadn't had many girls for friends. She of course had contact with women. Her mother, Karen, her sisters. She was close to them all, but growing up she had never been friends with girls her own age. Instead, all her friends had been guys. It was great as a little girl, because she hadn't been a typical girl. Instead of wanting to play with dolls and tea sets, she had preferred to play tag and make mud pies with Lucas and the boys. She had just felt comfortable with the guys. Safe, secure, which did not change once she got to high school. She still preferred her time to be spent with the guys, especially when she realized the gulf between she and the girls at school was far larger than she had realized. Yet she could admit sometimes it had been hard, not having a girl friend in her life, someone who could understand entirely what it was like to be a girl, a teenage girl. She was close to Lucas, and of course Nathan, but there were some things she couldn't talk to them about. Boys, her period, getting a new bra, she could just imagine the look of horror that would have befallen the Scott boys' faces had she brought up any of the sort. Instead she relied on her mother, Karen, and her sisters for those conversations.

However, that changed when she went away to school at Stanford. She still had Lucas around since he went to Berkley only an hour away from her, but at college most of her friendships were with girls. Her closest was with Lindsey Strauss, her freshman year roommate.

Lindsey and she had hit it off right from the start, finding a rather quick bond. She had been happy to have a friend in her life that she had similar interests with, that she could get along with so easy, that she could talk to. When she found herself interested in a boy in her freshman year English Lit class, it was Lindsey she had talked to. When she had questions about make up, about what types of clothes would appeal more to guys, it was Lindsey she had talked to. When she had sex for the first time with her first boyfriend in college, it was Lindsey she had talked to. She loved having the boys in her life, but she had realized through her friendship with Lindsey how important it was to have the perspective of a girlfriend. She could talk about things like sex and not have to worry about feeling uncomfortable, or having Lindsey lose it, as certainly Lucas or any of the guys would have. It was common for the boys to sometimes forget that she was their friend, not their little sister. So she valued Lindsey, and she certainly valued Peyton, who opened her up more, who pushed her to be the confident, strong woman she had always wanted to be. But God it was just too hard to tell her what happened. She didn't even know how to breach the topic.

"Yeah okay," Peyton laughed, shaking her head. "My secret is that I told the boys to put a ton of rum in the egg nog" she stated in amusement.

"What?! Peyton!" Haley scolded, watching as Peyton shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly. She should have known.

"Oh come on Haley. I know you're a lawyer like half the people in this room, but you and everyone else need to loosen up a little. It's the holidays. What better reason to get drunk?" Peyton laughed, brining her glass of wine to her lips and taking a sip for show.

"Loosening up is fine. That is not," Haley said, as she pointed over to Johnson, who was now singing along to Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas."

"You're right. He's no Mariah" Peyton joked, laughing when Haley hit her arm once again. "It's fine Haley. God I can't wait for Jake to come. He'll love this. It reminds me of the time when we spiked the punch at our senior prom. Classic."

"What is wrong with you two?" Haley laughed, not helping but be amused by Peyton's antics. "Where is the better half by the way?" she teased, laughing again when Peyton stuck her tongue out at her.

"You're such a mean boss" Peyton stated in a dramatic fashion, putting her hand to her heart. "He's on his way, he just had to drop Jenny off. Jake's parents are going to watch her overnight."

"Oh that's nice of them," Haley stated with a smile, as Peyton nodded at her.

Although Peyton and Jake loved their little girl immensely, she knew it was hard for the both of them to sometimes balance taking care of her. With Peyton working for her, as well as devoting herself to her art, and Jake a music teacher as well as a musician, they had little time to themselves after working and parenting. She was glad they were getting a night to just be.

"Yeah well Jake practically begged them after I came out of our bedroom wearing this little number," Peyton stated, as she pointed down at her dress. "He's so easy. I swear he was on the phone asking them to take Jenny for the night before I had made it two feet into the living room."

"Well I'm glad you two are getting a night to yourselves. You both certainly deserve it. Just keep the really graphic details to yourself, please" Haley joked, watching as Peyton smirked at her. "By the way you look gorgeous. The green looks fantastic on you" she commented as she looked at Peyton in her knee length dress.

It was a perfect dress on her, really it was. Elegant due to the thick black belt adorned with a sparkly broach around her waist, but a little edgy due to the slit that ran up the side of the dress. They had gone shopping for dresses two weeks ago, but Peyton had trouble finding a dress she liked, stating that everything was so generic and obviously mass produced. She remembered they had gone to about fifteen stores, until Peyton had finally found the dress she was wearing now.

Peyton had been nervous about sporting it since it was a little tight, lamenting that she still carried around a little weight from her pregnancy, but she admonished Peyton telling her she was silly, before encouraging her to get it. She had told Peyton that the dress had seemed as if was made for her, it fitting perfectly.

"Thank you. And thank you for encouraging me to get it, despite the girly moment I was having" Peyton joked, shaking her head at herself.

Haley smiled softly as she patted Peyton's arm. "That's what friends are for "Peyt, I swear I don't know what I would have done without you the past couple of months. You keep me sane here, really. You're one hell of a friend" she said, smiling again when Peyton gave her a rare smile of her own.

"Ditto," Peyton stated, throwing an arm around Haley and giving her a squeeze.

"Besides which, if you're and I quote 'as fat as a cow,' then I don't know what I would be categorized as" Haley joked, repeating what Peyton had said when they had been shopping.

Letting out a small laugh when Peyton rolled her eyes at her once again, she brought her wine glass to her lips before taking a sip.

"What does Nathan say?" Peyton asked, laughing as Haley coughed again.

"Nathan? What? Huh?" Haley rambled, coughing as she once again tried to relieve herself after her wine went down the wrong way.

Looking over at Peyton she took in the small smirk, the curly blonde had plastered on her face.

Oh God. Oh God. Oh God. Peyton knew something was up. But how...how did she know?

"Nathan. You know New York City's leading attorney, the firm's most successful associate, your best friend. Dark hair, blue eyes, as handsome as they come. Nathan Scott" Peyton stated dryly, before flapping her eyelashes in an exaggerated way.

Haley cleared her throat, searching Peyton's eyes. "I umm…..I haven't see Nathan today."

What does she know? Oh God, what does she know?

"Yeah I gathered that since you seemed to have made it your mission today to avoid him," Peyton stated with a laugh as she shook her head.

"I have not!" Haley denied, sighing when Peyton arched one her eyebrows at her.

"Oh no? Peyton, if Nathan drops by tell him I'm not here. Peyton, if Nathan calls take a message or tell him I'm in a meeting. Peyton, if Nathan asks what I'm up to, tell him I really busy," Peyton mocked, doing her best to sound like Haley. "If that's not avoidance I don't know what is."

"I well…..I umm….." Haley began to ramble not sure what to say, not sure where to start.

Damn Peyton was good.

"Oh and let's not forget today when Nathan did actually stop by your office, you saw him as you were headed back from a meeting with McNamara and freaked. I've never seen you run so fast, and into the ladies room nonetheless" Peyton laughed, shaking her head. "Real smooth by the way Haley. The 'ole bathroom ditch'."

"Ugh. I was hoping no one had seen that" Haley stated, feeling herself blush at the memory.

She was a coward. She really was. But when she had gotten back from her meeting with McNamara about her latest case, and saw Nathan standing in front of Peyton's desk, just outside her office, she had freaked practically bolting into the ladies room. Having been submerged in legal jargon and talks of New York State mandates, she sure as hell hadn't been prepared to switch gears and talk about her life.

What a mess she had made.

"By the way Nathan didn't see you, thanks to me. Of course, now he thinks I'm weirdly into the stapler I keep on my desk," Peyton stated with a laugh.

"What?" Haley asked, laughter calming some of the nerves she felt by the mention of Nathan, of her reliving what had happened between them, about how poorly she had handled everything.

"When I saw you were headed towards your office, and knew you realized too late that Nathan was there, the only way I could get him from turning around and seeing you was by pointing to something on my desk to distract him. I ended up telling him all about how much I love my stapler" Peyton explained sarcastically, giving a small glare to Haley. "Now, if I get a stapler for Christmas from Nathan, I'm going to be really annoyed" she warned.

"Noted. No office supplies for Peyton this Christmas" Haley joked, blowing out a baited breath at Peyton's story.

"So are you going to tell me you and Nathan had sex last night or am I going to have to keep putting you on the edge, until you cave, and finally spill your guts?" Peyton asked bluntly, before taking another sip of her wine.

"I….I….what….how did you….I what?" Haley rambled once more, feeling an intense blush bloom on her face.

She couldn't help but quickly scan the people around her, making sure they hadn't heard what Peyton had said. She had enough to deal with what with having slept with her best friend and Peyton apparently knowing about it. She didn't need her colleagues to know, especially with the firm's rule about interoffice dating.

God did sleeping with her best friend count? She took another sip of her champagne. Thankfully most of the people around them had congregated to the center of the room to watch Johnson bolt out "Silver Bells".

"I believe I said something about you, Nathan, and sex. Something you conveniently forgot to tell me today might I add" Peyton said pointedly, raising her eyebrow at Haley.

"What in the hell did you and Nathan talk about when he came to find me? I thought it was staplers" Haley sighed, still in a little shock that Peyton knew, still in complete shock that Nathan had talked to Peyton about the fact that they had sex.

Nathan and Peyton were close, but it wasn't like Nathan to tell an intimate detail like that to a friend. Nathan was secretive with most, not one to bare what was on his mind or plaguing him. Unless of course last night meant nothing to him, she meant nothing to him, and he hadn't cared about telling Peyton.

She shook her head at herself at the thought. She had no idea what last night meant, what was going to happen between she and Nathan, how the hell she was going to deal with the fallout from this morning, from avoiding him all day, but she knew enough to know that last night wasn't meaningless, that she did mean something to him.

"Nathan didn't tell me Hales. I know I may be blonde, but I ain't stupid. It was pretty obvious what with the way you both were acting" Peyton responded, laughing at the confusion etched on Haley's face.

"Well than you are more powerful than I thought. Or maybe I'm just that transparent" Haley stated, watching as Peyton shrugged her shoulders at her.

"The former is obvious. I am powerful, bow down" Peyton teased, with a small laugh. "And yes you my friend are extremely transparent."

"God. Do you think people know?" Haley asked worried, scanning the room around her once again, thankful to still find that Peyton and she were alone in the corner of the room they were occupying.

"What? That you and Nathan had what I'm sure was very hot, very passionate sex last night," Peyton stated knowingly.

"What? Oh my God Peyton" Haley groaned, covering her face, attempting to hide the crimson hue she knew she was sporting.

"So it was hot and passionate. I knew it!" Peyton stated triumphantly, raising her fist in the air in victory.

"Please ground open up and swallow me whole" Haley mumbled, glaring at Peyton when she raised her fist in the air. "Great now you know I had sex. I'm sure everyone knows I had sex and if they didn't it won't be too long. Oh my God what if I get fired? What if Nathan gets fired? Oh God?" Haley rambled in a panic.

"Haley calm down. No one is getting fired. As far as I know, I'm the only one in this office besides you and Nathan that knows" Peyton said softly, giving Haley a comforting pat on the shoulder.

"God was I really transparent?" Haley moaned, although finding relief in Peyton's words.

"Let's see, you avoided Nathan all day, which you never do. Whenever I went to go ask you something you were either frazzled or had a faraway, dreamy look on your face. Plus add to the fact that despite all the emotions you were going through all day, you couldn't help but sneak out some very big, very obvious blissed out smiles…..no it wasn't that hard to figure out," Peyton explained, smirking at Haley who groaned before she put her face in her hands. "I mean that evidence would have totally helped me figure it out, if Jake hadn't spilled the beans."

"I'm sorry, what?!" Haley asked, getting thrown for a loop once again by Peyton.

Now Jake knew. Or wait, what was that? Jake had told Peyton. Who in the hell had told Jake?

"Apparently Nathan called Jake earlier today needing Jake's advice. He said at first it was just about a girl, but Jake picked up really quickly on the fact it was about you," Peyton explained, as Haley listened attentively.

"Advice? About me?" Haley repeated, biting her lip as her mind began to go into overdrive thinking about Nathan, about what kind of conversation he could have had with Jake, about why he went to Jake in the first place.

"Yeah. Jake said he was upset and confused about what had happened this morning with the both of you," Peyton said with a little sympathy, before letting out a small laugh. "I mean I never pegged you Hales as the 'hit em and quit em' type. Nathan yes. You, definitely not."

"Ugh God. It's such a mess Peyton. I've made such a mess" Haley stated, feeling herself get overwhelmed with everything, about the fact that she had truly made a mess, a mess she might not be able to fix.

Nathan had sought out Jake's help. He had been upset, confused…...God she had made a royal mess.

"Don't do that. Don't get upset Haley," Peyton told her, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"How can I not Peyt? I mean not only did I sleep with Nathan, my best friend, I completely abandoned him the morning after. I didn't say anything to him. Not one word. And oh no did I try to fix that? Nope! I just went right on not talking to him, avoiding him the entire day. God he probably hates me or at the very least is super pissed off at me," Haley sighed, holding back the tears she could feel welling up, tears she had been keeping in all day.

She had been on an emotional roller coaster today, feeling all so much, so quickly, barely being able to process any of it. Of course it all had to surface at the office holiday party. Great. She was going to need a glass of the eggnog in about two minutes, because her wine was surely not helping her frazzled nerves.

"Haley be serious. Nathan doesn't hate you. I don't think he could even if he tried. It's so clear that man is head over heels for you. I still don't understand how you have denied it to yourself all this time, but I glad to see you finally opened your eyes" Peyton stated with a small smile.

"Peyt come on. Nathan, head over heels for me? I don't think so," Haley sighed, shaking her head as Peyton looked at her pointedly.

It wasn't the first time that Peyton had voice such a notion. In fact, the first time Peyton had met Nathan, Peyton had pulled her aside and asked her to explain their entire history. When she had finished, Peyton had asked whether or not they had ever dated. When she had laughed at the question, Peyton had held steadfast. She denied it, rolling her eyes when Peyton told her that if Nathan and she hadn't dated yet, it would eventually happen. She had laughed once again at that, Peyton responding by telling her it was written all over Nathan's face the way he felt about her. That something happening between them was inevitable.

"Haley I know you're smart, hell probably the smartest person in this room, but I swear you can be so dumb sometimes" Peyton stated dryly with a shake of her head.

"Well gee, thanks Peyt," Haley stated dryly, rolling her eyes at Peyton.

"What? It's true. Haley, how can you not see how much Nathan loves you," Peyton said, shaking her head at Haley in disbelief.

"Love? I…..love…...no. Peyton, how many times do I have to tell you that…" Haley started, stopping when Peyton held up her hand.

"Haley you can tell me all you want about how you and Nathan have never been together, how you are friends and only friends, that you could never be with him, that he would never want a girl like you, which by the way is still as preposterous today as it was the first time you voiced it to me, but honestly it's all preposterous. You don't have to say anything, because it's as clear as day when he looks at you. I mean….have you taken in the way Nathan looks at you? I'm serious," Peyton asked, searching Haley's eyes.

"I…..I….I don't know….I…..I don't" Haley rambled, shaking her head watching Peyton smile at her. "How does he ummmm…..how does he look at me?"

"He looks at you like a man that is completely enamored, completely captivated, completely in love" Peyton said, her smile growing more with her words.

"In love" Haley repeated, taking in Peyton's words blowing out a slow breath.

"Last night, when you guys were together…"

"Peyton I'm not giving you a play by play" Haley couldn't help but laugh, Peyton joining in with her.

"We'll work on that. But what I was going to ask, before you interrupted me," Peyton stated pointedly, "was how did Nathan look at you last night, what did you feel, how did you feel?"

"I…..I….gosh...I" Haley rambled, shaking her head before closing her eyes, contemplating Peyton's questions.

The way Nathan had looked at her last night….God it had taken her breath away. Even before they had sex, even before they had gone to his apartment, even before they had kissed…...the way he had looked at her last night…..she closed her eyes at the thought.

After the others had left last night it had just been she and Nathan finishing up the preparation for the holiday party. They had gotten everything done quite quickly and efficiently by splitting up the tasks she had left on her list. The last thing that had to be done was decorating the large Christmas tree that they had displayed in one of the corner's of the room.

Although they had been talking most of the night, by the time they were almost done decorating, they had been silent, going about their task, comfortably so. It had reminded her so much of when they had been teenagers, of the days they had walked along the Marina so many years ago, sometimes saying nothing, but comforted by the silence, by just the mere presence of one another. At the thought, she had looked over at Nathan, smiling to herself when she found him in deep concentration as he decorated the tree. She had smiled at the sight, at the reminder to herself that although Nathan hated the holidays, he had been participating in getting the holiday party ready for her. Smiling wider she had called out his name, feeling her breath leave her when he had turned to her, the look in his eyes so intense. The intensity so much like what she had experienced many times before, it easy for her to see that he had a sea of emotions swimming in the dark blue of his eyes. Sometimes she had been able to discern what he was feeling, what those emotions meant, and sometimes she couldn't. But last night as he looked back at her, only a few feet between them, the air around them crackling, she had found herself thrown of kilter by what she saw within his eyes. Admiration, appreciation, respect….want, desire, need.

She told herself that she had to be wrong. Wrong of course to think that Nathan could want her. That Nathan could need her. That Nathan could desire her. She had to be wrong.

She had shaken her head at herself, tried to break the moment by asking Nathan what his favorite Christmas memory was. She had needed something to take her mind off of what she was so sure could not exist.

She had watched him smile at her question, had sucked in a breath when he moved closer to her, before smiling herself when he said that his first Christmas in Tree Hill had been his favorite.

She had remembered that Christmas, quite vividly so. It had been the first Christmas that her extended family had gone to her mother's sister's house, her family staying home in Tree Hill. It was a rarity, since they always hosted Christmas for the whole family at their house, but that year her parent's had wanted a quiet holiday since it was the last Christmas Vivian, her oldest sister, would be spending at home before she went off to college. It has also been the first Christmas celebration at her house that the Scott's had attended.

Her parents had initially intended to only have a celebration between the family, but when her mother and father found out that the Scott's too were planning a small celebration at their own home, they suggested bringing their celebrations together. What with her friendship with Lucas strong, the friendships between her parents and the Scott's growing every day, her parents wanted to make sure that the Scott's first holiday in Tree HIll was a happy one.

And it had been. She remembered worrying if her family would be too much for the Scott's, that the way they celebrated Christmas would make the Scott's uncomfortable, but she had been wrong. The Scott's had fit in perfectly, even Nathan to her surprise.

Up until then they had still been holding a grudge against one another. They had still remembered that they hated one another, she sure as hell hadn't forgotten what he had done to Mr. Waffles, but they hadn't been at each others throats, avoiding each other for most of the night. That was until she went to go turn on the Christmas Tree lights as her mother had asked, finding Nathan standing in front of the tree just staring at the ornaments. She had found it a bit strange, couldn't help but point out the fact, rolling her eyes when Nathan had turned and gave her a scowl before turning his head back to the tree.

Fighting the urge to tell him off, she had turned on the lights, with all intent and purpose to return back to the dining room where everyone was sitting, when Nathan had stopped her. He had asked her what was her favorite ornament on the tree, a question that her surprised her coming from Nathan. She said as much, then asked if he wanted to know so he could do something to it like he had with Mr. Waffles. Nathan had stated he hadn't done anything to her 'stupid bear,' before explaining that he just asked her what her favorite ornament was because he was curious. Intrigued by his question, she had sighed to herself before pointing to an ornament on the tree.

It hadn't looked very special. Not at least when compared to the other ornaments on the tree that had sparkled with glitter and sequins, vibrant colors popping out, their shapes intricate and detailed. No her favorite ornament was a plain red sphere, with the simple saying, 'Joy to the World' etched on it in script.

Nathan had asked her why it was her favorite, and she had explained to him that it was the last thing her grandmother had given to her before she had died.

She remembered a sense of sadness overwhelming her, having been close to her grandmother, her death divesting her. While her grandmother had given the ornament to the entire family, it was she who her grandmother had presented the ornament to her, her grandmother telling her that she wanted her to remember that when life got tough, when bad things happened, when she was frightened, or believed something was impossible, to always remember that there was joy to be found in the world. In triumphant, in success, in failure, in living.

She remembered telling Nathan about her last days with her grandma, the story of the ornament as she stared at the red sphere on the tree. When she had finished and looked over to Nathan she found to her surprise that he had been listening to her intently, sadness in his eyes. Sadness not in reaction to the story she had told him, not in reaction to her memories, but sadness for her. It had surprised her. The realization that Nathan could feel more than just hate for her.

But what had really surprised her was when Nathan had told her that he was sorry.

She had joked, asking if he was apologizing for hurting Mr. Waffles, laughing when he broke out into some laughter of his own.

That had been the first time she had seen Nathan Scott laugh. He had told her absolutely not, but that he was sorry about her losing her grandmother. She had smiled at him, a genuine smile that he was quick to return. It had been a nice moment between them. The anger they had for one another, the hatred, had still been there, it hadn't been forgotten, but for that day, in that moment, they had forgotten all that happened between one another, and just simply were. Together.

She had smiled at him once again before gently taking the ornament down from the tree, holding it out to him.

She had remembered the look of surprise etched on his face, a look that remained as she told him that she wanted him to have the ornament. He had refused at first, shook his head at her, but she had insisted telling him that her mother had told her that her grandmother had presented her the ornament so she would remember the beauty that life could bring, that the ornament would help her to remember to find peace in the world even when life sent her struggle.

She had seen he was about to object again, so she grabbed his hand, placing the ornament in his grasp, before giving him a smile as he clutched it. He had said thank you softly, so softly that she had barely been able to hear it, but when she looked at him, looked into his eyes, she could see the gratitude swimming in them.

It had been a nice moment. A good memory. One that she had easily forgotten during the years when she and Nathan had been at one another's throats. But as she stood next to Nathan last night in front of the christmas tree that they had decorated together, she couldn't help but smile at how vividly she could recall that moment between them. What she had said, what he had said…..the way she had felt.

When she asked Nathan why that particular moment was his favorite memory of Christmas, he had smirked at her, joking that it was his favorite because he had realized that day, that not even Haley James could resist his charm.

She had laughed at his words, smacking him on the arm playfully, rolling her eyes at him when he feigned hurt. He had laughed too, before growing serious, the intensity within in his eyes once again taking her breath away. He explained to her that it was his favorite memory because that day had been the first time that he had been around the entire James family. The first time he had really gotten to know them and understand them. He had discovered how close they were, how fiercely they loved one another and it had given him some solace at a time when he had felt that his own family was falling apart. He had explained that by then Dan had been riding him hard about basketball. While Karen had tried to protect him as best she could, she hadn't done enough. But seeing her family together, had reminded him of memories of his own family. Memories of his mother tucking him at night, memories of his father taking Lucas and him fishing or teaching them how to shoot a two pointer as they horsed around on the family basketball court. It had given him hope that his family could get back to that, get back to being a family. But he said most of all, it was his favorite memory because she had been there for him. Even if she hadn't known it, even if it hadn't been her intention, she had been there for him. He explained that her story of her grandmother, she giving him her ornament, had helped him realize that she had seen him, that he had existed to her, and that had helped to push away the loneliness he had been feeling at that time. That deep down in some way, she had cared.

That was when she saw it again, in his blue eyes. The same blue eyes that had intrigued her when she had first met him. The same blue eyes that had set her off so many times. The same blue eyes that she had often found herself lost in. Lost in the way that they could peer into her, lost in the way they could make the world around her disappear, lost in the way they could make her feel safe, make her feel comforted, make her feel needed…..make her feel wanted. The way he looked at her…...it set fire off within her. As a teenager that had scared her, scared her because of how intense it was, how intense it made her feel about him, about them. So she denied that the fire existed, not within her, because that was too hard to ignore, but within him. She told herself that the intensity she felt for him…..he couldn't possibly feel that too. The all consuming need to be with her, to have her, it couldn't be true. The passion, the want. He couldn't feel it too.

But last night as he looked at her, his blue eyes so deep, so soulful, so full of want, of need, of desire…...she knew he felt it too, the fire that was quickly threatening to consume her. The fire she had felt for years. The fire that began to grow more and more intense when she had felt him place his hand on her arm, when he slowly brought her into his embrace…...when he whispered her name….when he brought his lips to hers.

He had kissed her, an action that at first had shocked her. She had seen the look in his eyes, the want, the need, the desire for her, but she hadn't expected him to kiss her. Definitely not. So she had held still, taking in the feel of his lips against hers, the mingling of their breaths, the beat of their hearts in sync with one another. But when he whispered her name against her lips, this time shaky, still full of want, but a want that was desperate, she felt the desperation within herself and began to respond to his kiss.

Throwing her arms around his neck she had sunk further into his body, moaning his name as he slowly sucked on her bottom lip, before he did the same to her top lip. She could feel him savoring her, tasting her, taking her all in and she had kissed him back with more fervor, doing as he had done, sucking his bottom lip, before doing the same to his top lip.

They had kissed like that for several long minutes, only breaking apart when the need for air became too strong. But they hadn't separated, her body still aligned with his, his arms wrapped around her, his arms splayed on her back, her hands still gripping his shirt. He had rested his forehead against hers, their breaths once again intermingling before he whispered that he had wanted to kiss her for so long, that he had wanted her for so long.

That was when she had felt her control snap, the control she had been holding onto for so long. She had captured his lips once more, moaning into them, as she felt him kiss her deeper, his tongue begging for entrance, which she had quickly granted him.

It all happened so fast. Their talk, their kiss, Nathan confessing that he wanted her…..she telling Nathan that she wanted to go back to his apartment.

It hadn't been like her. To move so fast, to lose her inhibitions so quickly, to let her need and want consume her so much so, that she could feel her ability to think, to rationalize, to be realistic slowly slip away. But it was Nathan…...and none of that had mattered. Reason, rules, consequences, repercussions. None of that had mattered. All that had mattered had been Nathan, them….being with him, giving in to the need, the want that had been consuming her. The need and want that had her body screaming out for him.

They made love twice last night, Nathan making her feel…...God it had never felt like that, with anyone before. Granted she had only slept with two other men in her life, and while her sexual experiences with them had been fine, they were nothing like what she had experienced last night. The way Nathan had kissed her, the way he had touched her, the way he had moved inside her….it had all be so intense. Not just because it had been so passionate, not just because it had felt so damn good, not just because he had her reaching peaks she had never reached before…..but because she had felt so connected to him.

His eyes, his beautiful blue eyes, had stayed locked on her practically the entire time they had made love. Like always they saw right into her, but it had been more than that. She could feel him taking her in, more than he had ever before. Taking in the way she had smiled at him when he had laid her down on his bed. Taking in the way she had bit her lip as he began to undress her, his hands whispering against her skin. Taking in the way she had tipped her head back when he brought his lips to her throat, to her breasts, to her sex. Taking in the way she had cried out his name when he finally joined them, the feeling of him inside of her exquisite.

He had watched her, kept his eyes connected to her as they moved against one another, each of them bringing pleasure to one another in their movements, each of them bringing one another ecstasy as their hands touched and caressed, each of them bringing the other to the edge, to the point of no return.

It had been amazing. Far more amazing then she had ever thought it could be. Not because of the way it had felt to have Nathan kiss her, to touch her, to join them together, though all of that had been out of this world. Last night had been amazing because of the way he had made her feel.

She had felt connected to him. Completely.

Even after they had made love the second time, and Nathan had fallen fast asleep she had still felt that connection as he laid behind her, his naked chest against her bare back, his palm resting below her breast, his lips placed on the back of her neck.

It had been perfect. What she had been feeling had been perfect, being in his arms had been perfect, making love…..had been absolutely perfect.

And all of that, the night, what had happened, what had transpired between them….it had all scared her. Being with him, being them, getting lost in that, in him…..it had been perfect, and the threat of losing that, it had scared her.

Scared her so much that she had run.

As the light of dawn had seeped slowly through the windows of Nathan's bedroom she had panicked. Making sure not to wake him, she had moved out of his embrace, had dressed quickly, and had left his apartment. Left him behind, left him alone, without any word or explanation. Nothing because she she couldn't, didn't know what to say to him, too scared of what would come from what had taken place between them.

That was why she had been avoiding him all day, knowing that everything between them had changed, everything. She didn't know how to deal with that, couldn't.

"Hales?"

"God I'm sorry Peyton," Haley apologized, realizing that she had zoned out on Peyton.

"It was that good, wasn't it?" Peyton laughed as Haley blushed a deeper red.

"I uh….I umm…." Haley began to ramble, before letting out a small sigh as she took in Peyton's waiting face. "Yes. God yes," she confessed, letting out a small laugh as Peyton gave her a knowing smirk.

"So let me get this straight. Nathan finally confesses to you about the way he feels, you guys have what I'm sure was one hell of a night, and then you left him without saying a word?" Peyton asked, the confusion evident in her voice.

"Yes," Haley said, not missing the pointed look Peyton gave her. "What Peyt?"

"What Peyt?" Peyton repeated, before shaking her head at Haley. "Are you crazy, Haley? Or is this the 'smart girl being so completely stupid' thing again. I mean I know you told me that you used to have a crush on Nathan when you were younger, that it died, that you moved on, but it's clear to anyone that you're just as in love with Nathan as he clearly is with you. What gives?"

"I'm scared," Haley stated, the surprise she felt matching the surprise written on Peyton's face at her confession.

"Man. I thought I was going to have to wrangle the truth out of you. I have to say it's been one hell of a day" Peyton laughed, before quieting when Haley began biting her lip. "Haley what's there to be afraid of?"

"Are you serious Peyt?" Haley asked, not helping but let out a small laugh. "Oh I don't know…..everything" she stated in exasperation.

She knew what Peyton was doing. Knew that Peyton was rying to make her see that what she had been worrying about, what she had been brewing over, not only today but the past ten years of her life, was stupid. But it wasn't. She couldn't lose Nathan. The fear of that still as strong as it had been when she was fifteen years old.

"Don't be so dramatic Haley," Peyton laughed once again, rolling her eyes.

"Dramatic?" Haley repeated, not helping the small glare that came to her face.

"Too much tough love?" Peyton asked, tipping her head as she looked at Haley.

"Just a bit" Haley said with a small laugh, shaking her head.

"Sorry. I'll take in down a notch" Peyton told her, watching as Haley laughed at her. "Look Haley, there are things far more scary than finding out you're in love with your best friend" she stated with sincerity.

"Acid wash jeans?" Haley asked, smiling when Peyton let out a little laugh.

"Oh hell yes. Acid wash jeans, my mother-in-law, people who don't drink coffee, Doug Johnson's singing….."

"Clowns," Haley added, shuddering at the thought.

"What is with your excessive hatred of clowns?" Peyton laughed, shaking her head.

"Ummmm hello? The make up, the wide grin…...the giant shoes" Haley stated with another shudder, smacking Peyton's arm playfully as she laughed at her. "And I still promise I will not speak to you for an entire month if you still plan on getting that clown to come for Jenny's birthday."

"Alright, alright. I guess poor Jenny will have to do without a clown since her Aunt Haley is such a big baby." Peyton joked, with a grin.

"Whatever. They're scary. Just like your cooking," Haley teased, laughing as Peyton glared at her.

"I am not that bad!" Peyton protested, folding her arms across her chest.

"Sending Jake to the hospital for food poising isn't bad?" Haley pointed out.

"It was one time. Plus I stand by my argument that there was no expiration date on that cheese that I used," Peyton stated, with a triumphant nod to her head.

"Jake said the cheese was blue Peyt," Haley laughed, it increasing when Peyton rolled her eyes.

"He's such a whiner. Was it my fault I thought it was blue cheese?" Peyton said, shrugging her shoulders.

"Yeah, especially since you thought blue cheese would be a good addition to a chocolate chip cookie recipe," Haley said, shaking her head at Peyton.

"Whatever. He's still alive. Jeez. You would think I was the worst wife ever with the way Jake tells that story," Peyton pouted, as she shook her head.

"Oh stop. You know that's not true. That man loves you. Bad cooking skills and all," Haley stated, smiling as she watched Peyton smile back at her in content.

"Yeah. I know," Peyton whispered, another soft smile coming to her face. "And that's what I want for you Hales. To be with someone who loves you, and loves you so completely. I think you already have that with Nathan," she explained, as she gave Haley another smile.

"I know you want me to be happy and I appreciate that. I just don't know…..I don't know if pursuing something with Nathan would ensure that," Haley explained, listening to Peyton scoff at her.

"What? Are you serious? The happiest I've seen you is when you're around Nathan. You practically light up the room whenever he comes around. And trust me it's the same for him. I swear I've only seen him smile because of you. Puts the stereotype of lawyers being cold and hard to good use," Peyton explained, watching as Haley smiled at her words.

"I know I light up when he's around, Peyt. God I…..I love him. I do" Haley confessed, feeling herself smile more at her words. She thought it would be scary to say it out loud, to hear it, to fully accept it. But it wasn't. It felt….it felt right. "I have loved him since I was fifteen years old. But even at fifteen years old I knew that he and I….it could never be. It shouldn't happen," she stated with a sigh.

"What? Why not Haley?" Peyton said, shock and sadness evident in her voice.

"I just….when I was fifteen years old I told myself we could never be together because what I felt for him was one sided. That he couldn't possibly feel about me the way I feel about him. That pursuing something with him….that it would probably leave me in tears since Nathan would inevitably reject me or turn me away….."

"And now?" Peyton asked, encouraging her to continue.

"I know the way he looks at me Peyton" Haley whispered, watching as Peyton slowly nodded at her. "I've been denying it for ten years, telling myself it couldn't possibly be true, but after last night…..I now know he feels something for me. I don't know exactly what, maybe attraction…...maybe love, I don't know. And that scares me because the way I feel about him…..I'm crazy about him. Intensely so and all that brings me to, is thinking about what if he doesn't feel the same? What if he does and changes his mind? What if he just wanted to be with me to be with me last night for sex? I just….I can't deal with it, deal with what any of it can do to our friendship."

"That's a lot of what ifs Haley. You can't live your life like that" Peyton said, shaking her head when Haley made an attempt to object. "Look I know that's who you are. It's why I adore you. The way you have this inherent need to make sure everything is right. I think it's what makes you an amazing friend and an amazing person. But it holds you back sometimes and that's not fair to you…...it's not fair to Nathan."

"I know" Haley whispered, blowing out a shaking breath as she brushed a hand through her hair. "I know."

"You should talk to Nathan, Haley. From what Jake said, he's just afraid as you. Afraid to ruin what you guys have, afraid that you don't feel the way he does, afraid that he has hurt you in some way, but he wants you Haley. If you're afraid of anything at least don't be afraid of that, afraid of the belief that he doesn't want you" Peyton explained, wrapping her arm around Haley, bringing her into another hug.

"Thanks Peyt" Haley said with a smile, squeezing Peyton back, letting her know in unsaid words how much she appreciated her advice.

Peyton was right. She needed to talk to Nathan. She was petrified to do so, her stomach flipping at the mere thought, her nerves almost getting the best of her. But Nathan deserved as much. They both did.

"Now what do you say we get some egg nog? Maybe in a few hours we'll be putting on a show to rival Johnson's" Peyton laughed, Haley joining her.

"I would love to, but I think first I'm going to take your advice and go talk to Nathan," Haley said, watching Peyton's face showcase her surprise. "What? I know I've been a coward all day….well actually for years, but it's time I suck it up and put my big girl panties on" she stated, giggling when Peyton nodded her approval.

"Go get 'em tiger!" Peyton cheered, giving her a thumbs up in amusement. "According to Jake, Nathan was running a little late but is coming. They met up after work for drinks before Nathan came back here. I'm guessing since he's not here at the party, he's probably up in the offices."

"Okay. I'll be back soon. Will you be okay alone?" Haley asked, feeling bad for abandoning Peyton at the party.

"Of course. Jake should be here soon. Till then maybe I'll go find Joe Turner for a little chit chat," Peyton joked.

"Yeah you go do that" Haley laughed as she began walking away from Peyton, stopping when Peyton called out to her. "What?" she asked.

"I said you're not a coward Haley. You're just in love. It makes you do crazy things" Peyton said with a warm smile.

"Don't I know it" Haley laughed, before smiling in gratitude at Peyton's words.

"By the way, I left you an early Christmas present on your desk" Peyton smirked, laughing when Haley raised an eyebrow at her.

"I'm partially thankful, partially intrigued…..and definitely scared" Haley laughed, watching Peyton wiggle her eyebrows.

"Oh I have a feeling you're going to be very, very thankful" Peyton stated, winking at Haley.

"Ooooookay" Haley laughed again, giving Peyton a smile before she made her way through the crowd to go find Nathan and finally hash out the events of last night, about what it all meant for them.

_**AN:** So that is the end of chapter one. I hope you all enjoyed it. There will be a total of two chapters to this story. The second chapter will be up soon. Please feel welcome to leave a review_.


	2. The Confession

_**Disclaimer**: I do not own One Tree Hill. It is of course belongs to Mark Schwahn and the CW. Anything you recognize from the show is not of my creation. _

_**AN**: Thank you all for the wonderful feedback and response to this story. I really appreciate it. In truth, I hadn't expected to produce this story, believing my writing days were over, but I was struck by some inspiration. I was a little unsure of the story and myself as I hadn't written in so long, so I'm glad that many of you enjoyed the story._

_Special thanks to soulandspirit, itsonly4am, J. Caroline, aqualeo2425, naleylovepirates, Lozenge89, BrucasNaley4ever, LovelyLadyD, JamesLover23, Jj, AppReader, OTHfan25, and the guest who all left reviews. Thank you so much for taking the time to write such lovely feedback. I appreciate it greatly._

_Lastly, a few of you asked me about my old stories, which were taken down. I will try at some point to put them back up if I can. Thank you for asking about them._

_I hope you all like this chapter, the final one to this story._

**Chapter Two**

Haley let out a long sigh, as she once again looked up at her clock, noting that it was now ten o'clock. It had been three hours since the Holiday Party had started, two hours since Peyton had found her, and one hour since she had left the party to go talk to Nathan.

She hadn't found him. She had looked everywhere she could think to look.

She had looked for him in his office, even after she had found it pitch black, a clear sign that he hadn't been there. She had looked in the men's bathroom, calling out to him as she held the door open, frowning when it was clear he hadn't been there either. She had even gone up to the roof, knowing that it was a secret place he liked to go to when his day was rough, when he was being overwhelmed by the amount of cases he had, his client's expectations. Both of them had spent many a times up there just talking as they looked at the skyline of New York City. But he hadn't been up on the roof either, a point at which she began to once again worry about just how angry he was with her after her stunt this morning.

Of course she couldn't blame him. Not at all. But the thought of him being angry with her had hit her hard. So hard in fact that she had texted Peyton freaking out.

Peyton of course, ever sarcastic, told her to remember her vow to put on her big girl panties and 'suck it the hell up.'

She had laughed at that, before thanking Peyton for her utmost support. Peyton, had told her that she was welcome, before letting her know that Jake, who had arrived at the party soon after she had left, had come in with Nathan. Nathan had told both of them that he he had to head up to the offices to change into the Santa costume that she had picked up for him to wear for the party.

She remembered feeling so much relief at that moment, so much so she had felt her heart speed up in excitement, to her utter shock. After all, how could she be excited when her and Nathan were in limbo?

But she couldn't help herself. After her talk with Peyton, after reliving her night with Nathan, she wanted to talk to him, needed to talk to him. However, she decided to give him space, ignoring her desire to go straight to his office to see him. Instead she went to her own, knowing she would see Nathan since he had to walk past her door to get to the elevator.

Yet thirty minutes later there was still no sign of him.

He had to be avoiding her. She was sure of it.

_Who could blame him, _she told herself, sighing at her inner voice_. _

She really couldn't. She had after all avoided him all day and now she was getting a taste of her own medicine. Karma could be such a bitch.

Yet she couldn't help but feel the need to go find him.

She didn't know what the hell she would do after that, what she would say to him, but she wanted to find him, needed to see him. To just be in his presence. But she told herself to stay in her office. To give him the time he deserved. Unlike her, Nathan didn't turn away from anything, it just wasn't in him. He was determined and steadfast in everything he did.

She knew he would come find her at some point to talk to her. Hell he'd been trying to all day.

She inwardly yelled at herself once again, flopping back in her black leather office chair.

God she really was the smart girl, who was truly stupid when it came down to it all.

She laughed at herself in self-deprecation, jumping slightly when she heard her phone ring. Grabbing it, she turned it over to see that Peyton had texted her once again.

_Any sign?_

Haley signed as she typed no to Peyton. She couldn't help but look up, look towards the door, hoping he would miraculously appear. But no such luck.

She bit her lip, not helping but think back to last night, think back to the way she had bit her lip as she lay in Nathan's bed, his lips kissing the tops of her breasts after he had stripped her of the the crisp red blouse she had been wearing last night.

She could still remember the look of appreciation as well as the lust that had swam in Nathan's eyes when he took in the black lace bra she had been wearing. God she had been so thankful she hard worn that last night, wanting to please Nathan, to excite him. However, taking in the way he had looked at her as her creamy flesh was revealed to him inch by inch, she realized the appreciation, the lust that was swimming in his eyes hadn't a thing to do with what she was wearing, but rather had to do with her.

God the way he had looked at her last night.

The heat that had run through her body from his looks alone had been amazing, the feeling of which had gone straight to her core. She remembered taking the look in his eyes in and thinking about how much she needed him inside of her, how much she needed to feel him deep within her.

Haley shook her head at herself, blowing out a deep breath as she did so.

God she was torturing herself. She knew she was. Thinking about last night, about making love to Nathan, about the way Nathan had kissed her, tasted her, moved inside of her….

Yup, she was definitely torturing herself. Ironic since a few hours ago she had willed herself not to think of what had transpired between the two of them. Now it was all she could think of, besides finding Nathan. She wasn't upset about the fact that last night was seared indelibly in her mind, couldn't even fathom how hours ago she wanted to forget what had occurred between them. It seemed so wrong, not just because what they had shared had been so special, but because what they had shared had been so fantastic.

She had never been one to think about sex, at least not in the way she had a few minutes ago, but she couldn't help it. Nathan was an amazing lover. Amazing. To forget last night was damn near impossible, damn near criminal. She swore she could still feel his lips on her lips, his hands on her breasts, his tongue on her stomach. She was definitely going to have last night seared into her memory, seared into her skin for a long, long time. She smiled at the thought.

_Did you open your gift yet?_

Haley laughed as she looked down at the text message that Peyton had sent to her. Shaking her head she looked up finding the present in question: a small green gift bag filled with red tissue paper, a card sticking out at the top. She couldn't help but smile at Peyton's thoughtfulness, though she still had to admit that she couldn't help but find herself scared once again at what Peyton might have gotten her. It was Peyton after all.

Shaking her head, she pulled the gift bag towards her, pulling out the card first. Quickly opening the envelope, she let out a small laugh as she saw the bright red card, sprinkled all over with an excessive amount of gold glitter, little elves holding up a sign that said 'Merry Christmas,' Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer in the background with Santa Clause smiling cheerfully.

Definitely not Peyton's style, knowing that her friend had bought this particular card as a joke, probably being disgusted by the excessive amount of holiday cheer. She smiled at the thought. Opening the card she read aloud,

_Merry Christmas Hales!_

_ I'm not going to get all sappy or mushy because we both know that's not me, but know how much I love you and value your friendship. I have another gift for you that I plan on giving to you when we have our small dinner party with the others. I just figured you wouldn't want to open this one in front of them. _

_ Just remember, 'tis the season to be naughty.' Ho, ho, ho, merry Christmas! _

_ Love Peyton. _

Haley shook her head again, this time truly afraid of what Peyton had gotten her.

Peyton had written that she had thought she wouldn't want to open the gift in front of the others, which meant only one thing. That whatever Peyton had gotten her would probably embarrasses her.

She read the card again. 'Tis the season to be naughty.'

Oh God. She rubbed a hand down her face, blowing out a cleansing breath as she grabbed the gift bag, slowly pulling the red tissue paper out. Tossing the paper in the waste paper basket by her desk, she reached in slowly pulling out the lone object within the gift bag.

She shook her head, laugher bubbling out of her.

_Ho, ho, ho was right,_ she couldn't help but think to herself as she looked down once again at the gift.

Candy cane flavored condoms. Good lord. Only Peyton would have the confidence and gall to give her such gift. She surely would never, already feeling her face turn a crimson red.

God. It was like she was learning about sex for the first time. It's not like she was a virgin, it's not like she hadn't seen a condom, hadn't used one before. Hell she and Nathan had put plenty to use last night, she couldn't help telling herself.

She felt her blush deepen, this time not in embarrassment, but in need, in want.

Nathan. Nathan and candy cane flavored condoms.

She had never used candy cane condoms before, probably would have felt too shy using them with her previous boyfriends. However, she could feel her pulse race at the thought of using them with Nathan. Feel her pulse race, at the thought of getting onto her knees in front of Nathan, of pulling down his pants, the exhale of his breath softly moaning her name as she took him inside her mouth, and…

Good Lord what had gotten in to her?

Nathan, she couldn't help muse, shaking her head at herself at the horrible and crude joke. But it was true, and now she couldn't get thoughts of being with Nathan out of her head.

She couldn't help but smile to herself at the thought, it soon turning into a giggle, as she felt some lightness in her heart.

"What are you giggling about Hales?"

"Oh my God!" Haley screamed in fright as the sound of Nathan's voice interrupted her thoughts.

Jumping in her chair in reaction, she felt herself panic as she remembered she still had the condoms in her hand. Scurrying around, she quickly put them back in the gift bag, before shoving the bag under her desk.

Looking back at Nathan, she cringed as she saw him staring back at her with both shock and amusement.

_Ground, open up and swallow me whole. Thank you! Love Haley James._

"Haley I've known you pretty much all my life and I've seen you do…..well….I've seen you do some pretty strange things to put it bluntly, but that….whatever that was, was by far the strangest" Nathan stated, shaking his head in amusement as he looked at Haley giving him a shaky smile.

"Hey! I take offense to that mister" Haley threw back, pointing her finger at Nathan, letting out a small laugh in an attempt to calm her nerves. However, the laugh came out shaky and a bit crazed, causing Nathan to look at her once again in shock and amusement. More so shock. Definitely shock.

"So was that your Christmas gift for me Hales? Afraid I was going to see it too early?" Nathan teased as he walked further into Haley's office before closing the door behind him.

"What?! No!" Haley shouted, cringing once more when Nathan jumped a little at her reaction, giving her another look of shock with confusion laced in.

"Oooookay" Nathan stated with a laugh, taking Haley in, watching as she bit her lip and played with her hands, the fingers of her left hand twirling the gold glimmering ring she wore on the pinkie finger of her right hand.

Her actions were all signs of Haley being nervous….of Haley being uncomfortable. Maybe he had made a mistake by dropping by, by trying to talk to her. He sighed. "I can see this isn't a good time for me to stop by. I just….."

"No" Haley said quickly, watching Nathan's face drop at her words, clearly misunderstanding her meaning. "I mean no, it's not a bad time to stop by. I ummmm…...I'm glad you're here" she clarified, trying to give Nathan an assured smile.

"Oh good. Good" Nathan said, feeling relief come to him, the nerves that he had been feeling a couple of minutes ago, a he paced around in his in his office, contemplating if he should go find Haley, talk to her, try to hash things out with her, dissipating.

This wasn't like him. Feeling nervous. He didn't do nervous, wasn't his nature, a fact his father had constantly reminded him as a boy.

Scotts don't get nervous. They don't get nervous because their too confident, too talented, too strong, too damn good to be nervous about anything.

God it sounded pathetic to his own ears, but that was how he was raised, that was what he had always been led to believe, had believed, a fact that a lot of people pointed to as the reason for why he was a successful attorney.

He didn't get nervous about anything. Not when he was defending a client, not when he was questioning a witness, not when he was meeting with a judge. Feeling nervous was just not in his nature…...except when Haley James was around.

God she made him nervous. So damn nervous. He blew out another deep breath at the thought.

"Good" Haley repeated, giving Nathan a small smile as she watched him blow out a breath. "So that ummm….is quite the look you got going there" she stated, feeling herself laugh as Nathan brought his hand to his head, recognition coming to his face.

"What? You act like this if first time you're seeing me in a pointy red hat and a long white beard" Nathan joked, pointing at his ensemble, laughing when he heard Haley laugh once again.

Good they were joking and she was laughing. With him. That was very good.

After last night, after this morning, he had feared that he would never have moments like this with Haley again. Moments filled with laughter, moments where they were just them, friends, finding a comfort in one another, happiness. He could sense things were off between them, not surprising considering what had happened, but things were not as bad as he had feared this morning when he had turned over in his bed to find it empty, no Haley in sight.

God he thought he had ruined everything last night. Everything. They had been best friends for more than ten years, had seen each other through so much, had supported each other, had been there for one another in so many ways. She was his rock, well aware of the fact that he would not have survived so many of the things that life had thrown his way without her. She was the closest person to him besides his brother, and the thought of not having her in his life, of not seeing her, of not being able to talk to her, to be near her, especially because of something he had done…..it had eaten at him all day.

But he hadn't been able to stop himself last night, and although he had feared he had ruined their friendship, and had been in a state of panic all day over the fact, he couldn't regret last night. Not even if he tried.

He couldn't regret kissing Haley, holding her, touching her…...making love to her. He couldn't regret finally acting on his feelings. He would never regret that, ever. Especially since he had been fighting his feelings for her for years.

He once heard someone say, that it was peculiar place to find yourself in, when you discover that you're in love with your best friend. That feeling a romantic love, for someone who had once been a confidant was not an easy transition.

But it had been for him. It had been quite easy falling in love with Haley, quite simple actually. But it had taken him awhile to realize the fact.

They had after all begun their relationship as antagonists of one another. Hell the first day they had been together she had punched him the nose, and he had driven her from his house in tears. To be blunt they had hated each other. He had hated her, or at least he thought he had until years later, when the person he couldn't stand to be in the same room with, the person he couldn't fathom ever liking, ever getting along with, became the one person he couldn't imagine living without.

He had sought help from Haley, something he had loathed to do at the time. He hated her and the thought of asking for help from her…..a Scott didn't ask for help, especially not from someone they were at odds with. He kept telling himself that over and over again, but back then he had to face the reality that he had needed Haley James. Needed her because in his junior year of high school he had found himself failing all of his classes.

Of course back then he hadn't given a damn about school. Not just because playing basketball was what he cared about most. Not just because his father drilled that idea into his head over and over again. Not just because he was led to think that school was not going to get him to where he wanted to go….the NBA. No, he hadn't cared about school because he wasn't good at school.

Back then being arrogant and self-centered, he had only wanted to focus on what he was was good at, what interested him, and for him that was basketball, not school. He had been good at basketball, damn good, leading the Tree Hill Ravens to victory after victory as the team's star forward and highest scorer.

But he had found out rather shockingly so, that his talent hadn't mattered, at least not to Whitey Durham.

Whitey Durham had come to Tree Hill High at the start of his junior year. With college scouts looking at him more and more and the prospect of him getting recruited by a top basketball college a real possibility, his father had wanted to make sure that he had a coach that would make him shine. That was why Dan had recruited Whitey to the school.

To his father's surprise, Whitey at first denied his advances, a fact that still had him respecting Whitey to this day. It wasn't every day that someone stood up to Dan Scott. But Whitey Durham hadn't given a damn who Dan Scott was. However, after months of vying, Whitey Durham agreed to become the new head coach of the Tree Hill Ravens, four days before the basketball season started his junior year.

Whitey had said he had made the decision in order to be closer to his children who didn't live to far from Tree Hill. He liked to joke that Whitey had chosen the job as a means to make his life a living hell. Dan Scott had after all made Whitey's life a living hell with his persistent phone calls, letters, and surprise visits, in an attempt to get Whitey to sign on to coach the Ravens. Why not torture his son as payback?

Of course now he knew the idea was preposterous. He and Whitey were close, very close. He saw Whitey Durham as a second father, maybe the type of father Dan Scott could have been during his adolescence and teenage years, if Dan had been more warm, more caring. He loved Whitey, looked up to him, respected him, but back then he had hated him. Hated him because he had put his future with basketball at jeopardy by making it his mission, that not only were his players at their best on the court, but also in the classroom.

For him, a failing student, someone who didn't give a damn about school, Whitey's mandate that his basketball players had to at least have a B average to play for him, had threatened all that he had worked for.

Naturally, Dan tried to take the old man down, ironic given how much he had fought to have Whitey coach the Raven. But anyone that threatened Dan Scott had to be crushed. However, Dan quickly found out he couldn't do anything, the school board as well as Principal Turner refusing to fire Whitey. Yet that hadn't stopped Dan, his father encouraging him to make Whitey's life a living hell as a means to break the old man.

He had no problem doing so. Not back then, when he hadn't cared about anyone or anything. But it hadn't worked. Playing selfish on the court, showing up to practice late, mouthing off to Whitey, none of it had worked. That fact became blatantly clear on the fifth day of his mission to take down Whitey, when Whitey called him into his office telling him rather candidly that, 'if he didn't cut the shit,' he was off the team.

He had been rude to Whitey of course. Told him he didn't give a damn about the team or him or anyone else, to which Whitey had told him he better start giving a damn before he discovered the harsh reality that being able to put a basketball through a hoop would only get him so far.

He had stewed over what Whitey had said to him, had cursed him, told himself the old man could go the hell, before he found himself at the Tutor Center two days later, asking Haley to tutor him.

She had been the last person he had wanted to seek help from. Ever. But even when he had despised her, he had known how he needed her. Not just because Haley was the best tutor at Tree Hill High, but because even when he had been well aware that the hatred he felt for Haley was mutual, he had known that as her student Haley would help him.

Haley James could be a spit fire. He had been on the tail end of most of that. But she wasn't cruel. Sure she had said some hurtful things to him, had pushed his buttons, but she had never been so cruel to hit him where it hurt. Unlike everyone else who saw him as the golden boy, as the basketball hero, as Tree Hill's second coming, Haley hadn't. She had never given a damn. She knew that behind his bravado and confidence was a boy struggling with school, with life, with himself, and yet she never brought any of that up in their fights. He had known that going to Haley and asking for help at a time when he was failing, wouldn't bring judgement. Instead she would help him. It was who Haley was. Kind to the core.

Of course she hadn't made things easy for him, all but telling him to go to hell the three times he asked her to tutor him. Hell he had even sent Lucas to beg her to help him. But when she showed up at his doorstep one night telling him that she would tutor him, he knew he had been right, that she would help him.

Naturally, she had made demands of him, demands that had quite frankly pissed him off. Which was why he showed up to their first tutoring session late, wanting to piss her off.

He had and then some, listening to her go off on her little tirade about how she didn't give a damn about him being Tree Hill's star basketball player.

Usually a statement like that would have pissed him off, despite the fact that he had been more than aware that was how she felt about him. But he hadn't been pissed or angry or annoyed.

Instead he had found himself feeling appreciation for her, for the fact that she wasn't afraid to stand her ground with him. It had always been that way.

It had been an appreciation that had captivated him, drawn him to her. For weeks they had just been tutor and student, their time devoted to helping him improve his grades. But soon, very soon things had changed.

To his surprise it had been him to make that change. They had been down by the Marina, sitting at the picnic table they always sat at when they chose that venue to hold their session. He had been working on some math problems, Haley reading over one of his essays, when he had found the silence between them to too overwhelming. Normally silence had been good for him, allowing him to concentrate, to get his work done, but that day he had felt the need to talk to her, to hear her voice.

He had asked her what she planned on doing that weekend, to which she had rolled her eyes, before telling him that distracting her wasn't going to get him out of doing his work. He had just smirked at that telling her that he just wanted a small break, that he had just wanted to talk. He had seen that she was reluctant to go along, at first telling him to get back to work, before she caved in after a couple of minutes, telling him that she and Lucas had plans to go see "To Kill a Mockingbird" at the old movie theatre downtown.

He had laughed at that, to which Haley had just rolled her eyes again, telling him that she should have known not to tell him, that she should have known that he would make fun of her, judge her.

He had angered her, upset her, that much had been clear. But he hadn't meant to, a revelation that had been quite shocking to him.

Back then most of the things that Haley and his brother had done, were things he wouldn't haven been caught doing. Exploring vintage shops downtown, hanging out in the local bookstore, watching old black and white films, those things had been…..well lame to him. For him, what had seemed cool had been parties, drinking, pushing the limit on rules. But he had respected Haley and Lucas' friendship. He loved his little brother and it was clear back then as it was now, how happy Haley made Lucas. So although the things they had done sure as hell hadn't been things he would have participated in, he could respect those things, which was exactly what he told Haley, laughing when he saw the look of surprise on her face. He told her not to be so shocked, that although her plans were kind of lame, he wasn't completely against catching a move down at the old theatre, especially if was to see "To Kill a Mockingbird."

Haley had laughed at that, asking if he had ever even read the book, a state of shock passing over her face when he told her that, 'you never really knew a person until you walked around in their shoes, or something like that.'

He had watched the surprise come to her face once again, not just at her realization that he had actually read the book, but also at the fact that he had referenced a particular line from the work as well. He had told her again not to be so shocked; confessing that he had actually read the book and liked it, before saying that he wasn't a dumb jock, smirking back at her as he he told her that he was more than aware that his grades said otherwise.

He remembered her looking at him for a minute not saying anything, searching his eyes. He had found himself thrown off by that. Thrown off by the way she always seemed to be able to make him feel off kilter. But that time it had been different. She hadn't thrown him off kilter because she was looking at him with contempt, or anger, or annoyance…...she was looking at him as if she was taking him in. As if she was seeing him for the very first time.

They had sat there just looking back at one another for another minute, before she had smiled at him, letting out a little laugh as she shook her head at him, telling him that he wasn't a dumb jock, that he was more than that.

From that day on, he had found it more and more easy to talk to Haley.

He told her things he had never told anyone. Not his so called friends, not his teammates, not his brother, not anyone. It had been so easy to do so. Far easier than he would have expected. So easy when all he had to do was look into her brown eyes, and see how much she cared.

That was how quickly they became friends. A friendship that strengthened as time passed.

By his first year of college, Haley had been the one person he could go to, the one person he could talk to, feel comfortable being himself around. Even with the distance between them in miles, they remained close. She was always there for him, always, a fact that he would forever be grateful for because she had saved him. Saved him because in his freshman year of college he had lost the one thing he had always thought he could never live with out, basketball.

It had been an injury. An injury to his knee to be exact. He had been playing in one of the last games of the season. The team had been leading, he had been the highest scorer of the game. There had been talks about him, murmurs that several NBA teams were already interested in Duke's most talented star. He had let it all get to his head, had believed it was just about him, about impressing the NBA, the fans. He had forgotten what he had learned from Whitey, had forgotten about respecting the team, respecting the game. His coach had called a play, he hadn't listened, a virtue he had learned from his father, and decided to do his own play instead. He had the ball in possession, went for a lay up, when a player from the other team fell into him, knocking him to the ground, all of his weight landing on his knee.

The second he hit the ground, he had known it was all over. Even before the doctors had told him, even before he had seen his father's stricken face, even before his crying mother had held him…..he had known his basketball career was over.

There would be no more college ball, no NBA, no fulfilling of a dream he had worked his entire life for. Basketball was over.

It had felt like a ton of bricks had fallen on him, like his world had caved in, and so he had fallen into a deep depression.

He had started drinking to numb the pain. Then he had begun doing drugs to give him more of an escape. He spent his nights partying, sleeping from one girl to the next, trying to forget it all. He spent his days being reminded of what he had lost, what he was doing to his life, and so he drank more to numb the pain, to mask his failure. He flunked his last semester, being told by the school that if he didn't shape up, then they could no longer have him there as a student.

He had gone home that summer with all intentions of falling deeper into the abyss, of losing himself, because nothing had mattered. Nothing could get through to him.

Of course people had tried. His mother, his brother, Whitey, hell even his father. But no one could get through to him, no one…...except Haley.

It had surprised him at first, given the fact that he had severed all contact with her after his injury.

It had been stupid, selfish. He knew that now. But back then he hadn't wanted to be around her, knowing doing so would make him feel an enormous sense of guilt.

He had known Haley completely, had known that she believed that there was good in everyone. Back then when he had been drinking his nights away, doing drugs, sleeping around to numb his pain, he had known it was the type of behavior that she wouldn't have condoned. Had known that she would have been disappointed in the choices he was making. And that...just the idea of Haley being disappointed in him, led him cut himself off from her, knowing he couldn't deal with her seeing how much of a fuck up he was. How much of a fuck up he had always been.

So he had ignored her. Her calls, her emails, her letters. In the rare times that he actually took the time to talk to Lucas, he would change the subject every time Haley was brought up. He just couldn't hear about her, hear Lucas tell him that shutting her out wasn't the answer, that he was hurting himself and in the process hurting Haley.

He had tried to kill their friendship, thought he had, until she had showed up at his house a couple days after he got home from school.

Well actually she hadn't showed up, she had barged in.

He had been home alone that morning, his mother at the cafe, Dan at his car dealership, Lucas shooting hoops with the guys. He had been sleeping off another night of drinking, when he had felt something hard come down on his head. He woke up to find Haley standing over him, pillow in her hand, scowl on her face, before stating 'rise and shine,' with the most annoying smile she could manage, before hitting him unceremoniously once again, across his head with a pillow.

He had barked at her, told her that if he wanted to be annoyed that morning he would have set the alarm. She had just ignored him of course, throwing off his covers and telling him to get his lazy ass up.

He had barked at her again, told her to go away, told her to go home, but she had held steadfast. He could remember yelling at her about how he needed her to leave him alone, that he needed to sleep, that he had been out the night before drinking and didn't need her making an already bad hangover worse. She had just stood above him as he continued to lay in bed, his faced turned away from her, before telling him that it wasn't just about him.

He had laughed at her, told her he didn't see how it couldn't be, since he was the one who had gotten injured, had lost his dream, had been left with nothing, to which she had rolled her eyes at him, before telling him that his behavior had to stop. She told him in no uncertain terms that he was killing his mother, upsetting his brother, hell even worrying Dan. She told him that it wasn't just about him, that his pain was everyone's pain because they all loved and cared about him so much. She explained to him however, that if he was going to make what had happened entirely about him, than he needed to open his eyes and realize that what he was doing was sending him down a downward spiral that would end badly for him. That he would end up with nothing.

He had wanted to yell at her, scream at her, had wanted to tell her that she didn't know what the hell she was talking about. That she didn't know what it was like to have a dream, to have it in your grasp, and then watch it disappear in a flash. He wanted to tell her that he didn't care what that meant for his mother, for his brother, for his father…..hell for her. He had wanted to tell her to go away, to leave him alone, to get out of his life. He had wanted to tell her that he was nothing. That he had nothing.

But as he looked at her, as he saw the concern, the care, the worry etched in her eyes, her big beautiful brown eyes that held unshed tears, he hadn't been able to do it.

It had been one thing to cut Haley out of his life when they were apart, miles separating them. It had been less painful that way, far easier. But doing it to her while she was right in front of him, while it was so damn clear that all she wanted to do was help him, to be there for him,…...he just hadn't been able to do it.

He would like to say that's when it all changed. That he got the help he needed and recovered, but it was not quite as easy, not quite as simple.

His recovery had been a long road, a very long road. Not only had he needed to rehabilitate his life, but also his body, his partying, the drinking and drugs, having messed with his recovery.

It had been difficult, painful, exhausting, hell upsetting, but Haley had been there for him every step of the way. She had helped tutor him that summer as he took classes at the local community college as a way to put him in good standing with Duke. She had driven him to every doctor's appointment, so he could get his knee examined and allow the doctors to do any procedures that needed to be done. She had even helped him with rehab, taking short walks with him along the Marina, running with him when he was ready to do so, down at the beach.

Every outburst he had, every setback he faced, every tear he had cried…..she had been there for him. Always. Even when on one particular day, he had almost ruined all that he had worked to regain, all that she had helped him with.

They had been exercising down by the beach, doing a light jog to help his knee, when he had lost his footing and had fallen.

He had been angry. Angry with the situation, angry with the pain he felt in his knee, angry with the memories that came flooding back to him. Memories of what had been, thoughts about what could have been but would never be. He had snapped at her when she laid a comforting hand on his shoulder, telling her he didn't need her pity, before getting up and walking away.

He had heard her calling his name, heard her pleas for him to come back, heard the pain in her voice, but he hadn't cared.

One hour later he had found himself at a bar on the outskirts of town, nursing a glass of brandy, fighting with himself over whether or not he should drink it.

He had wanted to. God how he had wanted to. He had wanted to drink, and then drink some more, until he forget about how hard the summer had been, how hard life was, how hard life would be without basketball. He had wanted to forget about his family…..about Haley, about the disappointment in himself that was swirling inside of him.

But he couldn't drink the glass of brandy.

Looking around him, taking in the fact that it had been two o'clock in the afternoon, and he had been sitting in a seedy bar all alone…..he had realized that he couldn't do it. That he couldn't go down the path he was about to go down, the path he had gone down the months after his injury. He just couldn't do it, not anymore. He couldn't throw his life away, couldn't push away the people that mattered.

So he had left, walking around town for hours, thinking of what he had lost, trying to keep at bay the anger and the pain he felt, until he stopped….at Haley's house.

He hadn't planned on going to her house, not after the way he had treated her. He had wanted to give her some space, especially since he was positive she would bite his head off over his display earlier that day. But he couldn't stop himself, had needed to see her.

Letting himself into the house and up to her room, he had found her on the phone, talking to what he had gathered was his voicemail, listening to her as she pleaded for him to call her, to let her know that he was okay. It was then that he had known she wasn't going to yell at him. That she wasn't going to judge him or turn her back on him, like he knew he deserved. No. He knew she would be there for him, the way she always was there for him when he was going through something difficult, when he felt himself falling, when he felt an intrinsic pull to just give up. He knew that she would listen to him, that she would comfort him in any way she knew possible. Knew that she would give him a sense of peace, a sense that even when life was so hard, so difficult, so painful, he had someone….he had her...to see him through it all.

As he listened to her speak to his voicemail, heard how upset she was about the way they had ended things that day, he had finally spoken up, telling her that he was too. He had watched as relief and happiness flooded her face once she had realized he was there, and he hadn't been able to help but feel the same relief. Happiness from being in her presence, of seeing her, of knowing that she was there.

She had immediately run over to him and pulled him into her embrace, telling him that if he ever pulled a stunt like he had that morning, she could more than kick his ass. But she didn't yell at him or judge him or condemn him. Instead, she had pulled him over to her bed, letting him sit down, before doing the same.

For a few minutes neither of them said anything. They just sat there, taking it all in. The moment, one another…..the silence.

It was a routine for them. Visits to the Marina, journeys to the beach, trips to the River Court. They would just go to a place, somewhere they could be alone, somewhere they could just be, and just take it all in.

Whatever was plaguing them, whatever they had faced for the day, whatever awaited them outside their bubble of safety, they would just sit in silence, comforted by the presence of one another. So many times they had escaped to wherever they could because of him, because of something Dan had done, or some pressure he was feeling, some overwhelming emotion that was suffocating him that he could only reveal to Haley. And every time it would be him that would break the silence, Haley never saying the first word.

He told himself it was because she wanted him to know that she was there for him. That whatever was bothering him, whatever he was facing or trying to conquer, she wanted him to know that she was there for him, that she would always be there for him.

Yet that night as they sat on Haley's bed, the silence enveloping them, it was Haley who broke the silence, asking him simply, if he was okay.

He had told her that he wasn't. He hadn't been.

He explained to her, that most days it felt like things were never going to be okay, revealing to her that he had gone to a bar that day intending to drink his way to oblivion.

He had heard her sharp intake of breath at his confession, had seen the worry in her eyes, but she didn't say anything, just brought a comforting hand to his back.

He reassured that he hadn't drank anything. That he had ordered a drink…..but hadn't taken a sip.

She asked him why, raising her eyebrow at him, and he explained to her that he couldn't because of him, because of his mother, because of his brother, because of his father…..because of her. He explained to her that as he had sat in the bar, as he fought with himself not to drink the Brandy he had ordered, he told himself that if he could leave, if he could find the will to not run away from his pain, from his problems, that he would be able to find her in order to tell her how sorry he was, and to let her know that nothing else mattered, nothing, except her. Her encouragement, her support, her friendship, her love…..that was what mattered, that was what had been getting him through the summer, through the pain and heartbreak that had become so ingrained in his life.

He remembered Haley just looking at him, taking in his words, before she brought her lips to his cheek, leaving a soft lingering kiss on his skin.

Watching intently as she had pulled away from him, he had taken in her beautiful brown eyes, and felt himself floored by the emotions swirling within them. But what had struck him the most, was the pain he could clearly see she was experiencing, knowing without a doubt it was because of him. Not because of the hurtful things he had said to her earlier that day, not because he had abandoned her, had let her down…...no the pain had been there because she cared about him so much.

The revelation hadn't exactly been shocking to him. He knew how much she cared about him. But the extent of how much she cared for him…..it wasn't until that night that he realized how deep that ran within her. In her heart….in her soul, without any doubts or reservations….she cared about him.

It hit him like a ton of bricks, and in that moment as he looked deeply into her eyes, as he watched her smile softly at him, as he took in the rapid beating of his heart, the sense of completeness he felt just by being in her presence, the sense of completeness he always felt in her presence…...he had realized that he was in love with her.

The girl that could look past all his mistakes, the girl that could care so much about him, the girl that had helped him in so many ways, more ways than he was certain she didn't realize….he had been in love with her. Haley James. Completely, totally.

It had sent him in a whirlwind at first, discovering that he was in love with his best friend, the girl he had gone from hating to not being able to imagine his life without.

Most definitely had sent him in a whirlwind. But the shock had only lasted for a couple of seconds, the peace that had come with his realization soon taking over. It was then that he was able to take in how much he loved her, how deep that love ran….how right his love for her felt.

It may have taken him awhile to realize he was in love with her, but he had been well aware how easy it had been to do so. How easy it was to love Haley James. His quirky best friend. Unique and endearing, sweet yet strong, supportive yet opinionated, confident but inexplicably shy at the drop of a hat. Her smile brilliant, her laugh infectious.

She had always given him a sense of happiness, an emotion he hadn't been used to feeling back then. She made him feel, something he had never thought he would be capable of. Because of Dan, because of his mother, because of himself and the way he viewed the world, the way he had gone through so much of his life thinking that the only thing important was himself. He had never thought he would be able to feel anything true for another human being. But Haley made him feel. Everything. She was everything. Flawed and yet so perfect, so beautiful it could take his breath away.

Back then, even at twenty years old, he had had a lot of experience with women, a lot. But none of them compared to Haley. He could admit that he had been superficial back then, that he had cared a lot about looks, only giving his attention to women he deemed as hot or sexy, but they were never beautiful. Beautiful hadn't been a word that he had used, until Haley.

Of course even before he had realized he was in love with her, he had been well aware of the fact that Haley was beautiful. He was a guy after all, and despite the fact that she had been his best friend, it was hard not to notice how attractive she was. The amazing part, was that Haley hadn't even realize it. It had flabbergasted him, really it had, but he had understood. Understood that Haley saw herself as smart, studious, responsible…..a nerd. She hadn't seen herself as beautiful, partly because of herself, because of her insecurities, and partly because of those around her, of social conventions. People labeled her as intelligent not beautiful, not realizing what he had discovered from getting to know Haley, those two things were not mutually exclusive.

Haley was brilliant, but she was also beautiful, devastatingly so. Granted she hadn't dressed like girls her age, but that fact only seemed to enhance her beauty. She didn't need to wear make up or revealing clothes to show how attractive she was. It was natural, something that was intrinsic to her. Her beautiful soulful eyes, her pink pouty lips, her porcelain skin…...beautiful.

Beautiful and sexy…...so damn sexy. He had felt an attraction to her, one that was immediate when she first began tutoring him and she had told him that his bluster and bullshit didn't mean a thing to her. She had stood up to him and while it had impressed him, it had also attracted him to her. The way fire had burned in her eyes, the way she had folded her arms over her chest in defiance, the way she had pursued her soft pink lips…..so damn sexy. He could remember wanting to kiss her lips, to know what they felt like against his own, wanting to know what they tasted like, what it would feel like to drown in her. But he had kept his attraction for her at bay. A task that hadn't been easy. Not even close. It was hard to fully ignore the tight jeans and t-shirts she wore, which showed off her body quite nicely, a body he had wanted to see, had yearned to feel, to know, desperately so. But he had been able to ignore his attraction to her for the most part, his body's need to want her, to have her kept at bay…...until that night in her bedroom. That was when it had hit him full force.

Hell it had all hit him full force. His attraction to her, his love for her….his need and want for her. It had hit him so hard and yet it had felt so right, so true, so much so that he had wanted to tell her, to let her know how he truly felt. But he hadn't. He couldn't, because of how much he loved her.

Back then, he had been a mess. A complete and utter mess. Despite the fact that Haley had helped him in so many ways, despite the fact that, that night he had felt a renewed sense of wanting to put his life back together…..he had still been a mess and he hadn't wanted to drag Haley into it, far more than she had been pulled into it already.

He had known that she had wanted to help him and he loved her for that, so much, but he couldn't bear the thought of her getting caught in his rip tide.

The pain he had seen on her face, the pain from him having disappeared…..he knew he couldn't stand to see that pain on her face again, that he couldn't stand knowing that he would be the cause of that pain. It was too much, a feeling that ripped him apart.

Telling her he loved her…..he hadn't known back then what it would mean, to her, to them, what would result in a declaration to her. But even the thought of going down that road with her was something he knew he wouldn't be able to deal with. Not just because he was afraid of the consequences that could come to her should something between them happen, but he was afraid of how intoxicating the idea them being together was, the reality being more than he was ready to handle given what he was already facing.

He had known that if he had told Haley that he loved her and she had reciprocated those feelings…...he would have lost himself in her, totally. It was something he had known he couldn't do to himself and most of all to her.

His father had always told him to be selfish, to always think of himself first and foremost, and although by then he had learned better, had grown from that, so much so because of Haley, he knew at that moment in his life he did need to take his father's advice. That because of his recovery, his rehabilitation, he had to focus on himself, make sure he got better, both mentally and physically. He couldn't do that with Haley. He couldn't need her and he couldn't have her need him….because Haley had deserved more than him.

At that time in his life, he hadn't been able to fathom how he would measure up to being the man that she deserved. To him, Haley deserved someone who would treat her well, who would be her equal, who would protect her, and care for her…...which he had known he couldn't do. He had known he could love her, he already had, but he didn't think that could be enough. At that point Haley had been about to leave for college at Stanford and he wanted to give her the chance to find someone worthy of her, to be able to grow and to live. He couldn't pull her down with him. Wouldn't pull her down with him.

And so he didn't tell her how he felt. Promised himself that he wouldn't, a promise he kept for six years.

It hadn't been easy especially since Haley and he had remained friends. That hadn't been easy either. It had been hard enough to keep their friendship alive with him away at Duke and Haley back in Tree Hill. Add in the more than 3,000 miles that existed between Duke and Standford, and it had been a real struggle for them.

But after that day they he had gone to her house and sought salvation from her, after that day he discovered he was in love with her and promised not to drag her down, he had also pledged to fight for their friendship. He may have told himself he couldn't have her, but he knew he still needed her in his life, and he had been right.

When he got back to Duke his sophomore year it had been quite the adjustment for him. While the summer before he had managed to make up for lost time due to his injury and the tailspin he has sent his life in, he had still found himself behind academically, even after Haley having tutored him. The first semester he almost failed out again and had been told by the school that he had run out of chances and needed to kick it into gear or leave.

He had wanted to give up, almost did, but kept pushing himself. Though he had still struggled with the loss of basketball, the loss of his dream, he had accepted that basketball was no longer his future. Accepted that he was going to have to carve out a new one.

It was actually his father who had helped him face that reality, ironic given the way Dan had pushed him so hard from the very moment he had picked up a basketball.

It had taken Dan awhile, but he too accepted that his oldest son would never make it to the NBA. And so his father helped him transition his life. By second semester his grades steadily improved with a lot of hard work and phone calls to Haley, who told him not to give up, reminding him that he was Nathan Scott, and giving up just wasn't in his nature. By the end of sophomore year he no longer found himself on academic probation, but he still found himself struggling to figure out what he wanted to pursue as a major, as a career.

That summer he had stewed over it, knowing at some point he needed to make a choice, needed to choose a path. But it all had felt so final, so overwhelming, especially after he had his entire life mapped out. College ball, NBA, retirement.

However, the decision was made that summer after he got into a fight with Haley.

It had been over the first time they had met. He had been rude to her, making fun of a red cape she used to wear and she had punched him in the nose in retaliation To exact revenge, he had thrown her beloved teddy bear Mr. Waffles in some mud outside in his backyard. He of course had denied it, still did to this day, primarily because it was a sure fire way to piss Haley off. She would accuse him of the misdeed, he would tell her it hadn't been him, and inevitably she would responded by glaring at him, fire in her eyes, lips pursed, hands on her hips. So sexy.

On that particular day she had really taken her accusation a step further, saying that the mud on the bear was similar to the mud she had seen on his clothes that day. He had told her she was crazy before explaining that her evidence was weak, stating that it was circumstantial at best. That had really pissed her, but it had also impressed her. He remembered Haley smiling, before joking that maybe it was he who should be the pre-law major instead of her.

Pre-Law. He had thought about. Had stewed over it. Had thought about it some more, before making his decision. At the start of his junior year he officially declared himself as a pre-law major.

The fit had been perfect.

He could still remember his first law class, what he learned, what they discussed, what they reviewed, and being so enthralled by it. The basketball court had been a place where he felt himself become alive, felt himself tap into the best he could be, felt himself achieve greatness. He felt that in his first law class, felt that as he continued to pursue his major.

Haley of course had been thrilled to have someone else she was close to pursuing law, despite the fact that she teased him that he had stolen her major. But he knew she had been truly happy for him, the same happiness he had felt five years later when Haley called him up telling him that she had an interview at the law firm that he was working at.

He had been surprised to say the least. Although Haley had pursued law like he had, he had decided to go down the corporate route, taking a job offer from the prestigious New York City law firm of Johnson, McNamara, and Associates, a month after he had passed the New York Bar exam. Haley on the other hand had always planned to pursue human interest law, her attempt to save the world, one person at a time.

However, as he spoke to her on the phone over a year ago, he had listened to her explain how she wanted to take the job, knowing that working at a corporate firm would give her more financial freedom. When he had reminded her that wasn't the Haley James he knew, someone who would take a job for financial reasons, she had agreed before explaining that working at a law firm like Johnson, McNamara, and Associates would give her the the ability to do probono work, an opportunity she would not be afforded in most jobs. That and she could save money to one day open her own firm.

He had contemplated advising her against taking the position, talking her out of it if need be. While he loved working at Johnson, McNamara, and Associates, had found great success as an associate, he was afraid it would't be the right fit for Haley. But after listening to her, after remembering who Haley James was, someone who didn't lose herself so easily, someone who was strong, confident, brilliant, he decided to support her decision, knew he had to. Not just because she had supported him throughout the years in so many ways, but knew he had to because Haley taking the job at the law firm meant he had a chance to finally be with Haley.

Although so many years had pass since he had realized that he was in love with Haley, time had not diminished the way he felt about her. If anything, he had found himself falling more and more in love with her as the years passed by.

It was a love that was intense, all consuming, one he could feel with every fibre of his being.

Of course timing had been a bitch. He had finally pulled his shit together, had finally plucked up the courage to be honest with Haley about how he felt, only to find that the month Haley moved to New York to start her new job at Johnson, McNamara, and Associates, she had also started a new relationship.

Chase Adams. Even thinking of that name still pissed him off, despite the fact that Chase hadn't been in Haley's life for a number of months. But he couldn't help it, just like he hadn't been able to keep himself from being a prick to Chase when he had first met him.

Back then he had known it was wrong. At that point Chase hadn't done anything to him…..to Haley. But as caveman as it sounded, as much as he knew Haley would smack him for even thinking such a thing, he couldn't stand the thought of another man being with her. He was human, he was madly in love with her, and seeing her with Chase…..God it had killed him. So he hadn't been able to hold himself back, not even that first night he met Chase and Haley for dinner with the others.

He had been sarcastic, condescending, and cold towards Chase, it all kicking in to high gear the more Chase got affectionate with Haley. Haley had not been happy, not at all, which had actually led to them getting into a fight on the phone later that night.

It had been pretty bad. Probably as bad as the fights they had gotten into when they had been kids. He had told her that she didn't know Chase, that she was losing himself in a guy that she had just met. Haley had accused him of not supporting her, of being a judgmental hypocrite what with the fact that his life had pretty much consisted of his bedroom door being a revolving door for whatever woman showed event the slightest interest in wanting to sleep with him.

He had been hurt by that, by her words, by the anger he could hear in her voice, but he had held himself back from saying anything in retaliation. Not just because he didn't want to hurt her, but because at the end of the day he had known she was right. Even after college and his move to New York he had still continued to sleep around. It hadn't been as bad as it had once been, having relationships with a few of them, but even those had been short term, nothing close to being serious. They had just been there, a way to cope with the fact that he was hiding his heart from himself, from Haley.

But he had changed, had been more respectful of women than he had been in the past and the fact that Haley had not seemed to realize that…..it had hurt. Had brought back his thoughts that maybe pursuing something with Haley was not a good idea. That he wasn't good for her, a belief he couldn't help but wonder that she would have if he ever told her how he really felt. He had always been able to tell that despite what he did, what he said, how he acted, that Haley always believed deep down he was a good person. So the thought that he had been wrong, that maybe Haley didn't actually think that, God that had hurt.

But after a few days of cooling off for the both of them, Haley had showed up at his apartment, apologizing for the fight, for what she had said. She had promised him that she hadn't meant to be so cruel, telling him that what she had said was just said in the heat of the moment. He had asked her point blank if she thought he was a bad person, to which she reacted with shock and hurt. She had told him quickly that he wasn't a bad person, that he was the best person she knew. Kind, and caring, a bit too cocky for his own good, sometimes a bit of an asshole, but loving, amazing.

He remembered taking in her words, taking in the way she was looking at him with such earnestness, her eyes pleading with him to believe her. It has always been hard for him to believe that he was a good person because so much of what he did, so much of what he felt, told him otherwise. But Haley had always chased away those inner demons.

He remembered nodding at her softly, surprised when she placed her hand on his face, her thumb rubbing softly against his cheek. She had asked him if he believed her, if he believed he was a good person, and although so much of inside of him screamed that he wasn't, he had told her yes. Yes, because he had seen the truth in her eyes, could see that she truly believed he was a good person, and that helped him believe it was true.

He had wanted to kiss her so badly in that moment. So much so that he had told himself to put some distance between them as they sat on his couch, Haley's body next to him, her hand still pressed to his face, her thumb rubbing soothing circles across his skin. It was hard enough denying his heart by not telling her how he felt, but it had been as equally hard to deny his body the chance of being with her. He swore that simply being around her, had him aching for her with a need and want he had never felt before, had never thought could exist. Almost as if liquid heat was coursing through him, igniting his body.

That night as they sat on his couch, it had felt like the air had been sucked out of the room, the energy between them electric. He had felt the racing of his heart, the heaviness of his breath, the fire in his belly and all he had wanted to do was to bury his hands in her hair, and take her mouth in a slow kiss, tasting her, exploring her.

He had wanted to lose himself in her like he had so many times just by simply looking in her eyes. He had wanted to lose himself in her body, to have her in his bed, knowing how perfect that would be. He had wanted to explore every inch of her…..love every inch of her.

His thoughts alone had his temperature soaring, but somehow he had held himself back, snapping himself out of his thoughts, pulling himself back from Haley's embrace.

He had told Haley that he would support her, that he would try to be more accepting of Chase. Of course it had been the last thing he had wanted to do, but he knew he had to support her. That doing anything less would not be fair to Haley, would not be fair to their friendship. It had been hard, especially once Haley and Chase got more serious three months into their relationship. He had thought he was slowly losing it, that he was breaking apart. On the outside he was as supportive as he could be. However, internally he was in pain, his heart trying to bear it all. Bear the thought of losing Haley, of never being with her, of never being able to tell her how he truly felt.

His heart was given a reprieve however three months ago, when Chase suddenly broke things off with Haley.

He couldn't deny the fact that he had been more than just relieved. Okay fine he was an asshole. He was more than aware, especially given the fact that Haley had been hit hard by the break up. Things had been going well, Haley said they had even discussed moving in together, but Chase began to pull back, finally breaking up with her. Chase had told her they had been moving too fast. Part of him couldn't help but agree, but he of course hadn't told her that. She had been in pain, a fact that had crushed him.

Seeing her cry, hearing her blame herself for the break up, listening to her question what was wrong with her…...that had ripped him apart. His first instinct had been to hunt Chase down and kill him, almost doing so when he saw Chase two weeks after the break up, all over a girl at a bar that he, Jake, and Clay had went to, to grab some drinks. But he hadn't confronted Chase, had known it was the last thing Haley needed. Instead he had turned up at Haley's apartment, cookie dough and sappy romantic movies in tow, spending the rest of the night with her.

She was where he belonged, a thought that kept running through his mind last night as he and Haley stayed behind to finish up decorating for the office christmas party she had volunteered to do. Of course it had been a thought he had been having for months now, but it had become more clear after a conversation with his father a couple of days ago on the phone.

He had been telling his father that he was staying in New York a little longer to prepare for a case before heading down to Tree Hill for Christmas, thinking the lie was convincing, until his father had quickly called his bluff. His had father bluntly told him that he knew he was staying because of Haley, chuckling after he stated the fact.

He had automatically thought a fight would ensue. Sure that his father would tell him he was throwing his life away on a girl, to which he would inevitably tell his father to fuck off and stay out of his life, before hanging up. But that didn't happen. Instead his father told him that he was happy for him.

When he repeated his father's statement in question, his father explained that he deserved happiness especially given the circumstances he had faced, that he was glad he found that happiness with someone, and that he had always knew it would be Haley James.

Dan Scott the matchmaker. It was comical. Very comical, but his father had told him that it was obvious from being around Haley and him, how he truly felt about her. His father said that he recognized that the look in his eyes was the same one he himself often had when he was around his mother. Love.

He had tried to be nonchalant about it, still stunned that Dan wasn't causing an uproar about him actually feeling a human emotion, but Dan of course saw right through that, repeating that he was happy for him, but that he would be more happy if his son found his balls and finally told Haley how he felt.

That was the Dan Scott he knew. But he hadn't been able to keep from smiling at his father's words, his advice, the fact that it was so clear that his father was a different person. His mother, Lucas, and he liked to joke that it was because he was now Grandpa Dan. That Lucas and Lindsey's daughter Saddie, had melted her Grandpa Dan's heart. But he knew that part of why his father was a different person, a better person, had to do with his injury a couple of years ago, his downward spiral after that.

His father was a new man and so he took his advice last night, finally finding the courage he needed.

Courage. He was so used to being confident, of being so sure of himself. It had been like that when he walked onto a basketball court and faced a rival, and it was still like that when he walked into a courtroom to face an opponent. He held himself strong, never felt nervous, or unsure, never questioned himself, ever. But Haley, his feelings for her, the way she made him feel kilter with just a simple touch, a smile, really took a beating at his confidence. He swore he was like some bumbling teenage boy, when it came to her. Had been last night, as they stood by the Christmas Tree downstairs decorating it for the party.

He remembered looking over at her as she hung an ornament, watching her intently, taking her in.

She had looked so beautiful. Of course she was always beautiful, but something about last night, something about the smile that spread across her face, the happiness that radiated in her eyes, the aura that surrounded her…...she had been glowing.

It had been hard for Haley the past couple of days not being able to go back early to Tree Hill to celebrate the holiday with her family. It had broken his heart for her, knowing how close the James family was, knowing how upset she had been, though trying her best to hide the fact. So the smile that had illuminated her face as she asked him what his favorite Christmas memory was…...it had been breathtaking.

He swore he had barely gotten through his story, sure he had stuttered and rambled ala Haley James style the entire time he had talked. The way she had been looking at him so intently, the way she had smiled at him so softly…...yup, she definitely had him fumbling over himself. But God she had him so twisted in knots. His heart had been racing, the butterflies in his stomach had been flapping mercilessly…...she had him crazed.

So he had snapped, pulling her to him, folding her in his embrace, before he took her mouth in a kiss. The mouth he had been dreaming about for years. The mouth he had been so desperate to feel, to taste, to explore.

The kiss…...God it had been electric.

Feeling her soft lips against his, tasting her, the sweetness of her intoxicating as his lips had slowly sucked on her bottom lip, before he did the same to her top lip, feeling himself come undone…...electric.

Of course his nerves had resurfaced again as he waited for Haley to reciprocate, as he began to yell at himself for being so damn hasty, for not being able to control himself. But when he felt her tongue snake out of her mouth and move slowly over his bottom lip, he felt his final hold on control snap.

He had brought her further into his body, had brought his hands into her soft silky brown hair, before tipping her head back and kissing her deeper, more fervently. After several long minutes they had broken apart, the need for air having them panting into one another's mouths as they leaned their foreheads together. He had told her that he had wanted to kiss her for so long, that he had wanted her for so long, watching as another smile illuminated her face. He had smiled back at her before taking her mouth in another kiss, unable to resist his need to taste her again, to feel her again.

He had been perfectly content just kissing her, but as he heard her whisper her want to go back to his apartment, he knew that simply kissing her wasn't enough. That he wanted more of her. All of her.

He had felt the same burning need and want course through his body the night Haley and he had made up at his apartment after their fight over Chase. But last night had been different, not just because he had finally been honest with her about how he felt, but because he swore he could see those feelings reflected back at him in Haley's eyes.

Their journey from the law firm back to his apartment had been quick. Very quick, as he rushed them along, Haley giggling along the way, teasing him with her heated words, with the lingering kisses she would leave on his neck as he drove them along the streets of Manhattan. But after that, things had gone slow, achingly slow.

He had been right when he had thought about how perfect Haley would be in his bed. God he had been right.

Haley laid out on his bed, her deep chestnut brown hair spread across his pillows, her pert breasts rising and falling as she took in deep breaths, the black lace panties covering her sex, want and desire for him swimming in her eyes…..definitely an image he would never forget.

So he had taken it slow, wanting to savor her. Wanting to savor the taste of her lips as he kissed her deeper, stronger. Wanting to savor the feel of her nipples against his tongue as he worshipped her chest with his mouth. Wanting to savor the feel of her hand combing through his hair, her other hand gripping his shoulder as he buried his head between her legs, his tongue and lips teasing her before she hit her peak, his mouth drinking up her sex.

But most of all he had wanted to savor the moment he finally joined them, sliding deep within her, their hands gripping one another's as he did.

He remembered holding still, their moans intermingling with one another's as they took in one another, the feeling of being so intimately joined.

It had felt amazing. Far more amazing then he had ever thought.

Feeling her surround him as he held still, as he kept himself buried within her, their eyes locked on one another's, their harsh pants the only noise filling his bedroom…...amazing.

Definitely far too amazing to end. But as her walls gripped him tightly, as her hips began moving against him begging him silently to meet her thrusts, he took them towards completion.

Meeting her thrusts slowly, he moved within her, deep and strong, wanting Haley to feel the same pleasure he felt. The pleasure he felt from the touch of her hands gripping his biceps as he thrust into her repeatedly. The pleasure he felt feeling her so wet and so damn tight, surrounding him as her walls held onto him tightly. So damn good. Her moans, her pleas for more, her crying his name as she finally climaxed, he following right behind, her sex milking him dry as he came harder than he ever had before….so damn good.

He wasn't a romantic. Not really. And he most definitely wasn't a sap like Lucas or even Jake for that matter. But being with Haley…..it had been perfect. Damn perfect.

A thought that continued with him as he held her in his arms as they basked in the afterglow of their lovemaking. Their legs entwined, his hand caressing softly against her back, her head pressed into his chest as her lips left soft kisses every so often against his skin, until he couldn't take it any longer, pulling her into a deep kiss, before burying himself between her legs once more.

Their coupling the second time had been fast and frantic, as he drove into her over and over again, both of them screaming their completion as they came together. Afterwards he had collapsed on top of her, his head buried between her head and her shoulder, breathing her in before he attempted to move off of her, afraid he would crush her. But she wouldn't let him, whispering for him to stay, as she held him more tightly in her embrace.

So he had staid. Staid in her embrace because the feel of their bodies aligned, the pecks they pressed softly against one another's lips, the beating of her heart against his own…..it had been so perfect.

Everything had been perfect…...or so he had thought.

Hours later he woke up alone in bed, Haley nowhere to be found. He had searched his apartment, called her phone…..but nothing.

It had been shocking to say the least. That and well…..heartbreaking. Ironic given the amount of women he had abandoned over the years after one of his many one-night stands. But Haley was not just some women and last night had not been a one-night stand. Because of Haley, because of what they had shared, because of how he felt about her. He had wanted her last night. Desperately so. But he hadn't wanted her for just last night. He wanted her, all of her. Always had. Always would.

But he had no clue how she felt. No clue. He thought he had last night after years of wondering if his feelings were one sided. He had thought he had felt her want in her kisses, the desire in her caresses, saw the need in her eyes. But Haley leaving him this morning, not saying a word…..Haley avoiding him all day…...he couldn't help but wonder if he had been so wrong. Haley wasn't someone who took sex lightly and she definitely wasn't someone who was accustomed to one night stands. But now he wasn't so sure. About anything. The fact that she had avoided him all day didn't exactly bode well. Not at all. He blew out a cleansing breath at the thought.

"Oh right, I forget it's your usual Saturday afternoon garb" Haley joked back, laughing before stopping abruptly as she took in Nathan's face, as she took in the fact that Nathan was a million miles away. "Nathan?" she questioned.

"Huh? What? Oh sorry…..I kind of just blanked out. What did you say?" Nathan asked, watching as Haley stared back at him, her eyes searching.

So much for playing things cool, Scott. He comes down to talk to Haley about last night and this was the best he could do? Shit. And he had gone to Jake for Christ sake.

He used to think he understood women, but after last night, after this morning he had started to believe that when it came to Haley he didn't understand a damn thing. So he had gone to Jake, not only because he was a close friend, but because Jake was married to Peyton Sawyer, the most complicated woman he knew. Jake's advice had helped earlier tonight as they sat in a nearby bar, drinking beers, talking about Haley, about last night. His nerves had calmed, and he had found his courage to go talk to Haley, to figure out what had happened between them. But now all the courage, all the advice and help Jake had given him had flown out the window. Damn he was screwed.

"I was just saying it's not uncommon for you to wear a Santa hat and beard" Haley said with a small laugh, breathing out a small sigh when Nathan let out a laugh himself.

"Well you know I do like to rock a Santa hat" Nathan joked, shrugging his shoulders at her.

"Yeah, well what about the suit?" Haley asked, raising her eyebrow as a smirk came to Nathan's face.

Things had been fine, and then so quickly they had become uncomfortable, awkward. She wasn't used to that. Not when it came to Nathan. Never. Being with him always made her comfortable, always put her at ease. She inwardly sighed at herself.

However, the fact that he was now smirking at her was sign. Albeit it was a small one, but it was a sign. A sign that things were becoming more comfortable….more normal between the two of them. She wasn't used to a bumbling Nathan, a shy and unsure Nathan. It was adorable, she had to admit. Especially since it was so rare to see him in such a state. But she much preferred his smirk. She much preferred the cool, confident Nathan, though she would never tell him that since Nathan was way too cocky for his own good. But his smirk was sexy. He was sexy. So damn sexy.

"It got lost at the dry cleaners?" Nathan stated, letting out a small laugh when Haley gave him a 'yeah right' look.

"It did not Nathan Scott! You totally didn't wear the suit on purpose" Haley accused, pointing her finger at him, watching as his smirk grew bigger.

They had bickered for days over Nathan wearing the Santa suit she had purchased for him a week ago for the party. She had thought it was adorable, white fur and all. He had not, telling her in no uncertain terms that her comment was coming from the person who wore an 'ugly ass poncho for two years of her high school career,' before stating vehemently that there was no way in hell he was wearing the suit. She had begged him, telling him that he couldn't be Santa without the Santa suit, and he had told her he had no problem with that, and would relinquish the role. Eventually she had won out. Of course she had to begged him profusely, even whipping out a pout she hadn't used since she was eight years old. At first he had resisted, but after a little more prodding…..okay fine, whining, he had relented, telling her that she was lucky he loved her so much.

She smiled at the thought, looking up at him with a smile, before it turned into a small scowl as she saw his smirk still firmly planted on his face. Loved her, her ass! He was such a liar. So busted!

"Can you prove that?" Nathan joked, watching as Haley gave him a small glare as she put her hands on her hips.

This was good, he couldn't help but think to himself.

She was pissed off at his statement, that he was sure of. Hell she was probably even pissed off at him, given the fact that he had promised her he would wear her stupid little Santa suit. He had known even when he had said yes, he wouldn't actually wear the suit. He would do pretty much anything for Haley, anything, but wearing a bright red Santa suit, with fur trimmings around his colleagues…..that was really pushing it. Hell no. So he knew she was pissed that he didn't do as she had asked, as he had promised. But she wasn't mad.

It was a relief, given the circumstances. Especially what with the thought of her being mad at him, having haunted him all day. It had been so bad, so very bad, as different scenarios had gone through his head, none of them good. With Haley avoiding him all day he hadn't been able to help but think that Haley didn't want to talk to him, that Haley hated him, that Haley never wanted to see him again.

But here they were together, and while she was pissed off at him, he could see that she didn't hate him. Thank God.

"Yes I can Nathan Scott, just like I can prove what you did to Mr. Waffles all those years ago" Haley stated, raising her eyebrow when she watched Nathan roll his eyes at her in jest.

"This again, Hales?" Nathan stated, laughing when Haley let out a small huff.

"This again? What is that supposed to mean?" Haley asked, crossing her arms over her chest as Nathan shook his head at her. "What?" she demanded, before letting out a little laugh as he shook his head at her in amusement.

Nathan smirked. "You harp on things Haley."

"I do not!" Haley protested, it sounding weak to her own ears. _Damn it!_

"Oh you don't?" Nathan asked his eyebrow raising at Haley. The girl harped on things times ten. There was no ifs, ands, or buts about it.

"I don't have any idea about what you are referring to Nathan Royal Scott" Haley responded, shrugging her shoulders at Nathan, her eyes watching him as he began to walk further into her office.

Nathan laughed. "Oh Royal? Breaking out the big guns there, Haley Elise James" he stated, smiling when Haley let a small laugh slip out. "I guess I'm going to have to do the same" he threatened, as he sat on the edge of her desk, taking off his Santa hat and beard, laughing when she pursed her lips at him in annoyance.

"Try me" Haley stated, regretting her statement immediately when Nathan's smirk grew wider. _ Damn it. And damn his smirk. _

"Let's see. Remember that summer our families went away to Florida?" Nathan asked, watching Haley smile immediately at his statement.

"You know I do" she said softly, her smile growing wider as Nathan smiled back at her.

"Good, because then I can count on the fact that you remember the pool incident quite vividly" Nathan responded, laughing when Haley let out a groan as she threw her hands on her face. "I'm sorry what was that Hales?" he asked with another laugh, as Haley uncovered her face before sticking her tongue of at him.

"Whatever Nathan" Haley said, trying to bite back the smile that came to her face, when he looked at her triumphantly.

She usually hated when he won, always needing to have the last say. But she couldn't help but smile at his teasing, despite the fact that it was at her expense. It was definitely better that he was smiling, instead of yelling at her for what she had done this morning. That would definitely be worse.

"Don't whatever me Haley James. Let me paint the picture for you. You, Lucas, Quinn, and I down by the pool of the hotel we were staying at. The four of us a little weary of the pool because the water was borderline green…." Nathan explained, smiling when Haley began laughing.

"Borderline green? Are you serious? Nathan there was algae floating on top. It was green, end of story" Haley pointed out, with another laugh.

"Semantics" Nathan shrugged as Haley shook her head in amusement. "Anyway, no one wanted to go in, so I merely suggested that it be you….."

"Suggested? Nathan you pushed me into the pool!" Haley stated, pointing her finger at him. Suggested? He had to be kidding.

"When I still argue, you tripped and fell in. I mean look at your track record Hales. You're as klutzy as they come" Nathan smirked, laughing when Haley reached over to him and slapped him on the shoulder.

"Whatever dude. You pushed me. In fact I remember you saying 'have a nice swim" before you rammed your shoulder into my back and sent me flying" Haley relived, smacking Nathan again on the shoulder as he began to laugh.

"See, you're harping. Fifteen years later and you're still harping" Nathan stated, watching as Haley tried to bite back a smile, doing a poor attempt.

"I am not! But even if I was, could you blame me? I repeat, you threw me into the pool. A gross, dirty one at that. I swear that pool was creating some unbeknownst bio forms" Haley shuddered, as she thought back to that day, thought back to Nathan pushing her into the pool.

It had been a surprise to her. Even back then when she had thought Nathan was evil incarnate, she had never expected him to do something like what he had to her. Then again she should have known he was up to no good when Nathan volunteered her to test out the pool, instead of figuring out who would do it through a round of rock, paper, scissors.

He so had volunteered her on purpose. Of course he had. It wasn't just the smirk on his face that told her so, but the fact that she knew he was well aware of how stubborn she could be. How she hated to back down. He had known if he volunteered her to test the pool out, she would not only have to save face, but would also want to stick it to him by doing so. He had used what he knew about her to his advantage, a fact she liked to point out whenever they relived the story.

And of course, she made sure everyone knew the evil, satisfying gleam Nathan had in his eyes as she resurfaced in the water, seconds after he had pushed her in.

She inwardly groaned. Fine, damn it. She did harp on things.

"Is this you not harping on things?" Nathan asked with a laugh as Haley grabbed a red gift bow on her desk and threw it at him, the object narrowly missing his head as he caught it in his hand. He smirked as Haley huffed in annoyance.

"I do not harp on things!" Haley stated, watching as Nathan shook his head at her in disagreement.

Ugh. After they talked and hopefully made up, she was going to kick his ass and then some.

"You do too Hales. But who am I to complain. I mean I do get to relive stories like that over and over again. I mean the look on your face when you were falling towards the water" Nathan laughed, reenacting Haley's shocked expression from so many years ago, his laugh increasing when Haley smacked him once again on the shoulder. "Oh man that was classic."

"Yeah, yeah. How about we stop this trip down memory lane. One embarrassing story about me is enough for the night" Haley said, not helping but laugh.

"Fine, fine. Although I do have to say, even though I know you weren't so happy about being thrown in, and I had to endure your threats to kill me the rest of the trip….that was a good memory" Nathan said, a smile coming to his face as he took in the smile on Haley's face. His heart racing at the sight.

"Yeah" Haley whispered nodding her head, taking in the way Nathan was looking at her. Taking in the fact that the look was so familiar. Not just because she had seen it all of last night as he kissed her, as he made love to her, as he held her in his arms as they laid together, their naked bodies tangled and twisted in his sheets. No it it was a familiar because it was a look she told herself for so long could not exist. Most surely not from Nathan. Not for her. But God it was there in his eyes. So clear, so evident, so breathtakingly striking. The want, the need, the desire. It was all there and she knew now that it had always been that way. That he had always looked at her in a way that made her heart race, in a way that set fire to her soul, in a way that chased everything away until it was just Nathan and her.

"So ummmm…..you ever going to tell me what really happened to the Santa suit?" Haley asked, trying to take her mind of her thoughts, off the racing of her heart.

It was hard to do it, so much so because she didn't want to. All her life she had been practical, reliable, mindful, cautious. She had so many times found herself getting tied up in the what ifs. Peyton had been right. What if she did this? What if she did that? Thinking like that had held her back in so many ways. The way she thought things things through, overanalyzed, looked at something from all angles. It had dictated so much of her life.

But being with Nathan…...was the opposite of that, of the way she typically operated. Last night was the prime example. Instead of weighing the consequences of the situation, instead of letting her brain dictate her life, she had followed her heart. Had followed what she yearned for, what she had wanted, what she had desired and that had led her to Nathan, had led her to their incredible, mind-blowing night together….had led her to finally come to terms with her feelings for him. He gave her the bravery to follow her passions, her desire….her heart. He made her heart race. So much, so rapidly, so breathtakingly so, and she loved that, loved that he could make her feel that way.

But she couldn't think, it driving her distraction. The last time she had let her racing heart take over, she had fallen into bed with Nathan. Not a bad thing. Definitely not. But she needed to deal with things. Needed a clear, calm head to do so.

"I told you, the cleaners lost it" Nathan stated, laughing when Haley scoffed.

"You're telling me the dry cleaners lost a very big, very red, very furry Santa suit?" Haley asked as she raised her eyebrow at him.

"Yup" Nathan confirmed with a smirk, letting out a small laugh when Haley looked at him, silently stating that she knew the shit he was trying to pull.

"You're such a butthead Nathan" Haley stated, watching as Nathan rose his eyebrow at her in amusement.

"Butthead? Well damn Hales. I don't think you've called me a butthead since you were twelve years old" Nathan laughed, watching as Haley gave him a triumphant smile, before she shrugged her shoulders at him.

God she was so damn cute. Cute? Christ he was turning into a sap. Since when did he use the word cute to describe a woman? When he realized he was in love with his best friend.

She was cute, she was sexy, and God she was beautiful, so damn beautiful. He couldn't help but look her up and down at the thought, taking Haley in as he did so.

She looked stunning tonight. Breathtaking. So much so he could feel his heart race more than it had already been doing so. Now that he was sitting on her desk, only a few feet from her, he was able to take a better look at her than he had when he had arrived to her office.

She was wearing a red dress, her obvious attempt to stay within the theme of the party. It was sophisticated and classy, fitting her personality, who she was, to a T. But it was sexy as well.

Peyton and Sarah's influence he knew. Haley and gone shopping with them about a week ago in search for a dress, ending up at his apartment after the girls were done and had parted their ways. Over pizza and a movie, Haley had told him Peyton and Sarah had talked her into wearing a dress she said she wasn't so sure she was comfortable wearing. She had told him she didn't think she would look good in it, didn't think she could pull it off. He told her she would look great in it, that she looked great in anything. He had been right.

The dress was strapless, revealing some skin, but in a tasteful way. Her shoulders were bare, her chestnut tresses laying over them. The dress dipped low enough so that he was treated to a nice show of her cleavage. Again sexy, but tasteful. He could feel his urge to want to comb his hands into her hair, her tresses soft and silky against his fingers. He wanted to tip her head back, kiss her, knowing now how sweet she tasted. He wanted to bring his mouth to her neck, run his lips along it, sucking slowly around the pulse point he had found last night, the pulse point that had her crying out his name. He wanted to bring his hands to her legs, the legs that were being revealed quite nicely by her dress. She had them crossed and he felt the need to untangle them, run his hands along them as he did last night as she held them tightly around his hips, as their lower bodies moved together.

God. He could feel himself stir, clearing his throat at the sensation, attempting to pull himself together. Even the thought of being with her had him hard and aching. Damn he had it bad. So bad.

"Well maybe it's time I bring that little gem back" Haley joked with a laugh.

"Is that anyway to talk to Santa?" Nathan asked, shaking his head in disapproval. "I think someone just might be on the naughty list this Christmas" he said with a laugh.

"Yeah….maybe" Haley said, feeling herself immediately blush at Nathan's words, at the thoughts that immediately entered her mind as she thought back to Peyton's card and gift. God.

It didn't help matters that Nathan was now smirking at her and not in the way he often did to piss her off. It was confident not cocky, firm and sure, and matched the look in his eyes. She blew out a deep breath.

She had seen that smirk, that look in his eyes last night. It had lit a fire in her. One smirk, one look, and she had been filled with a overwhelming need and want for him.

Last night, after they had gotten back to his apartment and Nathan had closed the door, she had immediately slammed him against it, capturing his lips in a searing kiss. She had caught him by surprise, hell her own need, her own actions had caught her by surprise. But, he had recovered quickly, pulling her into him. She could remember moaning into his mouth as he kissed her more deeply as his tongue wrapped around her own, as his hands speared through her hair, as his hardness pressed against her thigh.

It had been incredible, feeling him against her, imagining what he would feel like inside her, moving within her. She had wanted him desperately in that moment, pulling away from him, dropping the coat she had been wearing to his floor, before she began unbuttoning the silk blouse she had been wearing. She had been nervous, never being so brazen in her life, never having the confidence to undress in front of a man in such an open setting, but the way Nathan had been looking at her….the way he had been smirking at her, as she slowly unbuttoned her shirt…...she had felt sexy, wanted, desired. However, he had stopped her before she could fully remove her shirt, telling her that he wanted to undress her, that he wanted her in his bed, had been dreaming about her in his bed for so long, smirking at her even more, before he grabbed her hand and pulled her slowly towards his bedroom.

God that smirk. It had been so, so sexy and here he was smirking at her again, causing the same desperate want she had felt for him last night, swim within her. Except now it was stronger, burning through her, threatening to consume her. Consume her, because she now knew what it felt like to have his lips on her lips, kissing her deeply. She know knew what it felt like to have his tongue on her. Her neck, her breasts, her heat. She know knew what it felt like to have him inside her, his hardness moving against her walls, pushing deep within her, his thrusts hard and strong, as he brought her to the point of no return.

She blew out breath at the thought. Shaking her head, she tried to focus, tried not to think of the want she had for him, of the desperate need she had to strip him of the blue shirt he was wearing, unbuckle his black slacks, and…..

"Hales?" Nathan questioned, raising his eyebrow at Haley as he took in the way her blush reddened by the second. He couldn't help but wonder if she was embarrassed, if he had said something wrong, if she was feeling uncomfortable. But those thoughts quickly left his mind, as he took in the way Haley began biting her bottom lip. The action wasn't due to nervousness, like it normally was. From the look in her eye, from the way her eyes swept over his body, from the way her pink tongue ran quickly over her bottom lip…...holy fuck.

"I umm….so umm…...you ummmm…..I ummm…..I was going to….I ummmm…..I huh…..what I'm trying to say is…..that I umm…." Haley began shaking her head at herself, as she listened to herself ramble. God what was wrong with her? Couldn't she be cool and confident for more than a minute before freaking out? She had been so sure of herself last night.

Last night. God that was the problem. The minute her thoughts went back to last night, she turned into a bumbling fool. Not that she had never rambled before. She was the queen of rambling. But this really took the cake. She needed to talk to him. About last night, about this morning, about everything. It was becoming more than clear by the second. How she was going to do that and not sound like a complete moron however, was posing a problem.

"Are you okay?" Nathan asked, not being able to stop the small laugh that bubbled out of him. Probably not the best idea to be laughing at her. Just like it probably hadn't been such a good idea to piss her off, or bring up an embarrassing story of hers that didn't exactly paint him in the best of lights. But he couldn't help it. She was a mess. Bumbling and klutzy. But God he loved that. Found it so irresistibly sexy.

"Yeah I just...what I was going to say was…..what I wanted to say was…..." Haley tried, before sighing. "Were you planing on going sans costume to the party?" she asked, crying internally when she watched Nathan give her a look of confusion. Definitely not what she had wanted to say.

"What? Hales I thought we established that" Nathan laughed again.

"Right, right" Haley nodded, giving Nathan her best attempt at a smile, trying to assuage the concern and confusion she could see in his eyes.

_You can do this Haley James. _

"How is the party by the way? Are people enjoying my egg nog?" Nathan asked, laughing when Haley groaned.

"Yeah everyone including Johnson. I told you boys not to put in that much rum. If I don't get fired, it will be a miracle" Haley stated, giving him a small glare.

"That bad huh" Nathan chuckled, imagining the possibilities as Haley groaned once again.

"Nathan he's downstairs singing Christmas carols. Yes it's that bad" Haley explained, shaking her head at him as he began to laugh.

Nathan laughed some more, listening as Haley groaned. "Hales you worry too much. It's a party. People are supposed to have fun. I thought that was what you wanted. Hey, if that is how Johnson likes to have fun, all the more power to him" he stated, watching as Haley shook her head before letting out a small laugh.

"Okay maybe you're right, but if Johnson ends the night by stripping off his clothes, I'm holding you accountable" Haley warned pointing her finger at him.

"I'm not even going to pretend to know what you're talking about, but I'm definitely not taking the blame for that" Nathan stated, shaking his head. "Is he really that out of control?" he asked in amusement.

"Yes. You should have see him an hour ago. He was singing at the top of his lungs to Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas is You" Haley explained, before letting out a laugh.

"I'm sorry I missed that. I think" Nathan said with a small laugh, as he pictured his boss singing Christmas carols.

"I'm sorry too" Haley stated, biting her lip bottom lip as she internally yelled at herself to grown a damn backbone and tell Nathan what she had been avoiding all day.

"What? Why are you sorry?" Nathan asked in confusion as he shook his head at her, at the tone of her voice, the look in her eyes.

She blew out a baited breath. "I'm sorry that you missed part of the party because of me."

There she said it.

"Wait, what?" Nathan questioned, shaking his head at her. She was sorry? Sorry because she made him miss part of the party? What?

"Nathan I know you've been avoiding me tonight. Which I mean, let's face it, I totally deserve. I just…...I wish you had been there, wish you felt comfortable enough to be there" Haley explained to him, biting her bottom lip.

"Hales I…" Nathan began, stopping when Haley began shaking her head profusely at him.

"I just….I have to finish Nathan" Haley said, letting out a baited breath when Nathan nodded his head at her in understanding.

"Okay" Nathan said, feeling himself grow worried as he searched Haley's eyes, saw how upset she was, saw that she was fighting an inward battle with himself.

"I'm sorry about today, about this morning…..about last night. I made a mistake" Haley whispered softly, feeling her heart begin to beat faster, the butterflies in her stomach flapping more rapidly.

Last night she had relished in the feeling. The butterflies Nathan had caused within her had been incredible. Now, she felt so damn nervous, not wanting to look like a fool in front of Nathan, the only thing keeping her from totally freaking out. The butterflies in her stomach were in full force.

"Oh" Nathan said, feeling his heart drop at her words, at the fears that had been plaguing him all day finally coming to fruition.

She was sorry about last night, about what happened between them. She said it was a mistake. He blew out a deep breath.

"Nathan….I" Haley began, wanting to explain herself as she watched Nathan throw up his hands as he shook his head at her. This was definitely not going the way she wanted to. Not at all.

"Haley maybe we shouldn't do this right now. I just…...I don't…..I can't hear…..I don't think I can…" Nathan stated quickly before stopping, shaking his head at himself.

"Are you rambling?" Haley asked, half in confusion, half in amusement.

Well this was definitely a first. Never had she seen Nathan Scott so nervous, and she most certainly had never seen him ramble. When he had first arrived at his office his nervousness had worried her, unsettled her. Now she couldn't help but find some relief in it. She didn't know why, knew that Nathan being a bumbling mess right now was not something to exactly rejoice in, but for some reason she could feel her own nerves calming down.

However, as she listened to him let out a long drawn out breath, she recognized she was starting to feel something entirely different. It was worry and concern for him as she took in the way he blew out another baited breath, running a hand through his hair before he stood up from her desk abruptly.

"I'm sorry Hales…..I have to go" Nathan stated, beginning to walk quickly towards her office door, only stopping when he felt Haley grab his arm. He let out another long drawn out breath attempting to prepare himself, to prepare himself for what she planned to say.

"Nathan please don't go. Look we need to talk about last night" Haley explained, biting her lip, feeling herself tear up a bit when Nathan shook his head at her, his body still turned away from her almost as if he was waiting for any chance he could get to run.

_Good job Haley. Now he can't stand to be in the same room with you._ She sighed.

"I know we need to talk about last night Hales. I know we do" Nathan stated, finally turning around to look at Haley. He could see she was biting her lip, could see that she was upset, unshed tears in her eyes. He felt his heart hammer in his chest. "Look I'm sorry about last night, sorry that I upset you. I know that you're mad at me….hell I'm mad at myself" he confessed, watching as as Haley shook her head at him.

"What? Nathan I'm not….." Haley began, suddenly cut off when Nathan brought his hand to her face, cupping her cheek, his thumb caressing her skin. She could feel her heart race rapidly, the look in his eyes stealing her breath away. "Nathan…..." she whispered, before she was cut off once again, this time by his mouth pressing urgently against hers as he took her lips in a kiss. She signed and then moaned, as he crashed her body into his, his lips sucking on her bottom lip, before her top lip. Bringing her arms up, she grasped his shirt in her hands, holding on to him, falling into his body more as his tongue brushed across her bottom lip, before she granted him entrance, moaning once more as he tangled her tongue with his own.

God she loved kissing him, desperately so. Every time he kissed her, she could tell he was trying to take her in. All of her. That he was trying to taste, touch, feel all of her. Her heart, her soul. She knew that he wanted to drown in her, the same way she wanted to drown in him. But now….there was a desperation in his kisses. Not a desperation caused by an overwhelming feeling of passion or desire, but a desperation caused by an overwhelming feeling of need….to hold on.

She pulled away from him suddenly, needing to know what he was feeling, needing to know what he had been trying to say. She was afraid. God she was so afraid. But she needed him to talk to her, talk to her like they had for so long. Open and completely honest.

"Nathan" Haley repeated, bringing one of her hands to his face, cupping his cheek, watching as he closed his eyes at her touch. She called out his name again, closing her eyes as he brought his forehead down to hers, his lips falling down onto hers once again softly, wanting.

"I can't hear you say sorry Hales. I can't" Nathan said slowly, opening his eyes, breathing out when he saw that Haley was looking back at him, searching, yet waiting, listening to what he had to say. He gulped, trying to find the courage he needed to say what he wanted to say. "Look, I'm sorry about last night. About the way things happened. It….it shouldn't have happened like that. I...I never planned on it happening like that. I planned on telling you how I felt, hell taking you out, doing things the proper way. You deserve that. But I just….I couldn't resist you anymore last night. I had to have you. I wanted you so badly, baby" he told her, watching as she bit her lip at his words. "I'm sorry that I upset you. I didn't mean….I just…..that's not what I wanted. I get it. Get that you're upset. But God Hales I can't hear you say you regretted last night. That it was a mistake. I can't" he said softly, Haley shaking her head at him.

"Nathan I don't regret last night" Haley stated with conviction, watching as Nathan looked at her in confusion.

"But this morning…" he began, stopping when Haley placed a hand over his mouth.

"I have to say this Nathan or I'll turn into the coward I've been this entire day" Haley stated, watching as Nathan shook his head in disagreement as she pulled her hand away from his mouth, and placed it on his cheek. "I have been a coward Nathan. I'm so sorry about this morning. So sorry. I just…..I freaked. When I woke up in your arms this morning, I thought back to what we had done, what that could mean…..and I freaked" she explained, shaking her head at herself as she bit her bottom lip, hoping that Nathan understood, hoping that she could make him see how she truly felt about him, about what had happened last night.

"Why did you freak?" Nathan asked, needing her to explain. He felt some worry, some fear about what she would say, but with the way she was looking at him, the way she was caressing his cheek with her thumb….he could feel some relief. The relief that only Haley could give him.

"Because you're my best friend Nathan and I care about you so much. You make me brave. You push me to be confident, to believe in myself when it's sometimes so hard to do. You calm me down when I'm about to have one of my mini Haley meltdowns. You support me, let me know that you will always be there for me, that you will always listen to me" Haley explained, watching as Nathan gave her a small smile at her words. "Being with you…..I'm happy. Always. You make me smile, you make me laugh, and let's face it you're one of the few people who will put up with my quirky behavior. I mean you do make fun of me, especially when it comes to my old poncho" she stated, letting out a laugh when Nathan did the same, "but I know that you would never truly judge me for who I am, that you love who I am. You mean the world to me, and the thought of losing you…...I just couldn't bear the thought. So I freaked" she said, not being able to stop the tear that slid down her cheek, at the thought that she could have lost Nathan, at the possibility that she still could.

"Hey" Nathan began, bringing his thumb to her face, wiping away at the tear falling down her face. "You would never lose me Hales. I will always be here for you. I will always protect you" he pledged, watching as Haley nodded her head at him.

"I know that Nathan. I do. Because that's the way it's always been. Hell even when we were kids and at each other's throats, you were always there. I just….this morning all these thoughts kept running through my head, and I got worried that what happened, what could happen, had the real possibility of ruining our friendship. I can't imagine my life without you Nathan. I don't want to" Haley whispered her throat filled with tears, smiling through the few that fell when Nathan reached forward and pressed his lips to her forehead. "I mean who am I going to talk into watching old black and white movies on a Saturday night instead of going to a Knicks game, or drag along with me to a new exhibit at the museum, or take walks in Central Park in the rain?" she stated, letting out small laugh when Nathan smiled at her.

"Oh so you don't want to lose me because you'll have no one to torture?" Nathan joked, an attempt to lighten the mood, to cheer her up. He laughed when Haley punched him in the arm. "See? Torture" he smiled, it growing when a smile came to Haley's face.

"Whatever" Haley laughed, giving him a playful glare, before another smile came to her face as he brought his hand to her hair and tucked a lock of it behind her ear. She leaned into his touch.

"I love doing those things with you too Hales. I mean okay, there are times when I would really, really like to go to a Knicks game instead of watching some crappy black and white movie," Nathan stated, laughing when Haley punched him again, "but I like doing those things with you too. Love actually, because it means I get to be with you. You're my best friend too you know. I love spending time with you, being with you. That's all I want. Especially when we're doing this" he smirked, before bringing his lips down to hers and kissing her softly.

"I do too. A lot" Haley stated, letting out a small laugh when Nathan smirked against her lips. "But what if….." she began, watching as Nathan pulled back from her and shook his head.

"None of that. No what ifs Hales. Look, if I could see into the future, if I could guarantee that everything ends perfectly for us, I would. Especially if it would ease your fears, baby. But I can't. That's life. So when you're afraid, when you have your doubts, you come talk to me, okay? I'll do my best to make it better" Nathan promised, pulling her closer to him, bringing his hand to her chin and tipping her head up, so that she could see the conviction in his eyes. "If I'm sure about one thing in my life Haley James, it's that we'll always be friends. No matter what happens, I can promise you that Hales. You'll be the one wheeling me around when I'm eighty" he stated, watching as Haley nodded her head at him in understanding.

"Thank you" Haley whispered, rising on her tip-toes as she kissed Nathan, smiling when he kissed her back.

"So you don't regret last night?" Nathan asked, rubbing his hand over her hair, watching as she smiled up at him.

He already knew the answer. Had heard what she had said, could see the truth in her eyes, but he needed her to say it.

"No, I don't regret last night. I could never regret being with you. Last night was incredible" Haley said breathlessly, as she felt Nathan slide his hands along her back, one hand coming to rest on her lower back, the other on her hip.

"It was fucking amazing. You were amazing" Nathan stated, watching as Haley began to blush profusely. "God I love when you blush, especially now that I know that blush reaches everywhere" he groaned, as he brought one of his hands to her bare shoulders, caressing her reddened skin.

"Nathan!" Haley admonished, before she bit her lip as the sensation of his hand moving over her skin made her belly stir.

"What?" Nathan couldn't help but smirk, moving the back of his hand along her collar bone before he removed his hand, replacing it with his lips. Hearing her sigh, he brought his arm around her lower back as he left feather light kisses along her skin, his tongue sneaking out every so often to taste her. She tasted sweet, like vanilla and honey. He moaned at the thought, at the memories of discovering that fact last night.

"Don't what me" Haley admonished once more, before she moaned as Nathan began to suck at her skin, his teeth grazing her ever so lightly "God that feels so good Nathan" she told him, bringing her hands to his hair, holding him in place.

"Hmmm, that sounds familiar. I think you might have said that last night" Nathan whispered inside Haley's ear, before he began trailing kisses along her neck.

"Nathan you are so incorrigible" Haley laughed, smacking him on his shoulder when he began to suck hard on her neck, his tongue lapping at her skin. "Nathan Scott you better not be giving me a hickey. I'm wearing a strapless dress mister" she warned him, though her body told her to shut the hell up.

Truth be told, she didn't want him to stop, the sensation of his lips on her skin, the sensation of his tongue lapping at her pulse point, so damn good. But she didn't need her colleagues seeing a hickey on her neck. Definitely not.

"Hales" Nathan said, okay fine whined. He was whining. But he couldn't chastise himself for doing so. Couldn't because he had a desperate want and need to mark her. To see the red marks on her perfect porcelain skin and know that they were there because of him, because he had had his mouth on her, his tongue.

"Nathan I don't need anyone in this firm seeing me with a hickey" Haley said, laughing when Nathan pouted at her. "I mean let's not forget the rule that says co-workers are not supposed to get involved in romantic entanglements with one another. I think it will be kind of obvious what we've been up to if I show up to the party with you, after hours of being AWOL, hickeys all over me."

"Have you ever heard of the phrase, 'rules are meant to broken' Hales?" Nathan asked with a smirk.

"Nathan" Haley said with a laugh, shaking her head.

"Fine, fine" Nathan groaned, leaving a lingering kiss on Haley's neck before pulling away. He laughed when he saw the small scowl on Haley's face. "What?" he smirked.

"I didn't say you had to stop" Haley said, blushing a little at her words, watching as Nathan raised his eyebrow at her.

"Can't resist me Hales?" Nathan asked with a laugh, it increasing when Haley hit his arm playfully.

"If I say yes, I fear I will have created a egomaniacal monster, more so than you already are of course" Haley joked, laughing when Nathan gave her a playful glare.

"Well with comments like that, I don't think you're going to have to worry" Nathan said feigning hurt, smiling when Haley brought her lips up to his in a kiss.

"I'm just kidding, butt-head" Haley stated, giggling as Nathan rolled his eyes playfully at her. "And no I can't I resist you" she confessed, her blush blooming more when she took in the heated look in Nathan's eyes at her words.

When he looked at her like that, his blues eyes so dark they looked like midnight, that at any moment he would devour her, pleasure her in anyway possible…...well she found it hard to resist anything when it came to him.

"Well that's good to hear after an afternoon of you avoiding me" Nathan teased, before leaning down and slowly pulling her bottom lip into his mouth.

"I'm sorry" Haley sighed against Nathan's lips as he kissed her once again. "I was just avoiding facing my fears, not you" she told him, watching as Nathan pulled back from her and nodded his head.

"Yeah I understand that now, but I do have to say, when a girl would rather hide out in the bathroom instead of talking to you, it's a real ego killer" Nathan smirked, laughing when Haley groaned.

"You saw that?" Haley asked, groaning again when Nathan began to laugh.

"Yeah. I hate to break it to you baby, but an athlete you are not. Hell you almost took out Sheila from Accounting as you bolted through the bathroom door. Poor woman" Nathan stated with a grimace, reliving the memory from earlier today.

Of course hours ago, seeing Haley practically run away from him had broken his heart. Now after their conversation, after what she had said to him, he knew now why she had avoided him. That it had nothing to do with her being mad or regretting what had happened between them. She had just been afraid. So afraid….she ran to hide in a bathroom. He laughed again. Only Haley.

"Ugh" Haley stated, throwing her head back in embarrassment.

Nathan laughed. "It was rather entertaining. That and informative" he stated, watching as Haley quirked her eyebrow up in question at his statement. "Apparently. Peyton has a real fondness for her stapler. You think I should get her one for Christmas?" he asked, watching as Haley began to laugh. "What?"

"Don't get Peyton a stapler. For the sake of us all, just don't do it" Haley warned him, pointing a finger at him.

"Oooookay" Nathan said in confusion, before letting out a laugh.

"Anyway, I'm so glad my running didn't appall you. I'm well aware it's not the most sexy of sights" Haley joked as she let out a laugh.

Nathan was right. A graceful athlete she was not. She did after all, almost drown in a play ball pit when she was seven years old.

"You do realize I've seen you in that poncho thing you used to wear" Nathan stated, laughing when Haley scrunched her nose at him.

"Alright, alright. You've made your feelings about that particular item of clothing very clear" Haley said, glaring at Nathan when he shrugged his shoulders.

"It's ugly Hales" Nathan stated, pulling Haley into him more, a small laugh coming out when she attempted to resist him. "But you are very, very sexy baby" he whispered, watching as Haley smiled at his words.

"Oh yeah?" Haley asked, running her hands slowly up Nathan's arms before wrapping them around his neck.

"Yes, very sexy" Nathan stated, as he brought her lips into a searing kiss, moaning when Haley immediately entered her tongue into his mouth. They kissed slowly, deeply, until they had to break apart minutes later in need for air. He brought his tongue to his lips, tasting her, feeling his want for her increase. "Have I told you how gorgeous you look tonight?" he asked, watching as Haley shook her head at him.

"No" Haley stated with a small moan at the raspy sound of Nathan's voice, giggling when he suddenly stepped back from her before blatantly checking her out, his eyes slowly sweeping over her body.

She couldn't help but bite her bottom lip at his perusal, her action holding back a moan when he finally locked his eyes with hers and she saw that his eyes had once again gone from blue to midnight. She felt the familiar swirl in her body, this time so powerful it pulled at her core, her body screaming out for Nathan.

"You look gorgeous tonight. Told you so" Nathan stated, bringing his arm around her lower back, pulling her into him once again, groaning when she bit her lip, knowing that this time she wasn't doing it because she was nervous. There was a glint in her eye, a desire, and he couldn't help but smirk. "You're making it very hard to resist you baby" he said, groaning when Haley began leaving kisses along his jaw.

"Am I?" Haley couldn't help but ask, already knowing the answer from the look in his eye, from the way his hands were moving over her body, from the feel of him hard against her thigh. She couldn't help but gasp a little, at the feeling of him, at the fact that she had him obviously so worked up. It was a heady feeling knowing that she could cause such reactions in him.

"God Hales" Nathan groaned out as she reached up once again and began sucking slowly on a sensitive part of his jaw. He closed his eyes giving into the sensations, giving in to the way she felt in his arms, her body pressed tightly against his. She had him so hard and wanting, his need to bury himself between her legs so strong he swore he was throbbing. It didn't help that Haley had begun to rub her leg against him, her hip undulating into him. "Hales….." he warned.

"What?" Haley asked coyly, her eyes looking up through her eyelashes. She could see Nathan trying to keep his cool, trying to keep himself in check, which of course only served for her to want him more. She had been avoiding him all day and now all she wanted was Nathan kissing her, touching her, moving inside of her.

"I think we better get down to the party now or I can promise you we're never going to make it down there" Nathan panted softly, his breaths coming out slow and heavy as Haley swiftly undid his tie, throwing it to the ground, before she brought her fingers up to the top button of his shirt and undid it. It was an act that not only had him shocked, but also caused his cock to leap in reaction as she looked at him once again under her eyelashes. "Hales….." he breathed out, before her lips took his in a slow, deep kiss.

"I need you Nathan. Now" Haley whimpered pulling away from his lips as she continued to unbutton Nathan's shirt, his tan and chiseled chest coming into view.

God he had a body. So ripped and chiseled and muscular it was almost unreal. Even though Nathan had injured his knee back in college, he still played basketball, partaking in pick up games with Clay and Jake several times during the week. That and he ran, lifted weights, all of which reflected quite nicely in his body. Of course knowing him all her life she knew how his exercising benefited his body. How he was in tip top shape. But last night she really got to understand what that truly meant. His chest so hard, his stomach so defined, his arms so muscular and strong. God how he benefited from his hard work and so had she. The way his hard chest had felt against her bare breasts, her nipples hardening at the contact, the way his arms had felt holding her against him as he connected them, the way his abs had felt rubbing against her stomach as he slid his cock in and out of her body…...oh she had benefited rather nicely.

She wanted to see his body again, to feel it, to have him above her, pressing into her, her hands moving over him as he joined them once again.

"Here in your office?" Nathan questioned, shocked at what she had just stated. Of course his body was telling him to shut the fuck up. He had Haley ready and willing to have him take her in her office for Christ sake, the possibility of that almost sending him over edge. The fact that he had barely touched her…...well shit. But the thought of taking her on her desk, in her chair, on the brown leather couch that was in the corner of her office….holy fucking shit.

He blew out a cleansing breath, in an attempt to calm down. He wanted her. God he wanted to make love to her, wanted to be inside of her, wanted to hear her screaming his name as he thrusted into her hard and fast, her hands gripping his back as they moved together. But he didn't know if it was the smartest of ideas to do so in her office. They were at work after all. Albeit no one was up in the offices, everyone downstairs at the party, but it still was a bit risky. Hence his shock that Haley had suggested them having sex up in her office in the first place. Definitely not like her, which of course made it all the more harder to resist her. Literally.

"Yes" Haley said breathlessly as she undid a few more buttons of his shirt, her fingertips brushing against his chest, his skin feverish. "Do you not want to? Do you want me to stop?" she asked, raising her eyebrow at him as she felt him tremble slightly at her her ministrations.

"No. God I want to. I want you so bad. But are you sure Hales? Ten minutes ago you were just talking about not breaking the rules" Nathan pointed out, his body once again telling him to shut his mouth. Watching as Haley smirked at him, he swore under his breath, his hand reaching out to grip her hip, to pull her more into him, needing to feel her, needing her to feel him. He wanted her to know, wanted her to feel just how much he wanted her, despite his initial reluctance to make love to her in her office. However, regardless of how much he wanted her, above all else, he wanted to make sure she was comfortable, make sure she felt safe. He cared about her too much not to make sure that what she was asking was really what she wanted. However, when he watched her smirk grow more firm as she moved her hips once again into his, he knew she had no doubts. "You really are going on the naughty list Ms. James" he smirked.

"Like you said, rules are meant to be broken" Haley whispered before taking his lips in a slow kiss. Watching as Nathan pulled back, she giggled as he shook his head at her in shock at her statement. "Nathan, everyone is downstairs, the door to my office is closed, and well at this point I want you so bad I just don't give a damn" she confessed, blushing at her words, at the breathy way she had said them.

"There's the good girl Haley James that I know, blush and all" Nathan stated, watching her blush more, before he brought his lips down to hers immediately entering her mouth with his tongue. He kissed her deeply, exploring her mouth, tasting her, savoring her, groaning as her tongue met his. However, his groan grew deeper when he felt her finish unbuttoning his shirt swiftly, her hands immediately touching the skin of his stomach, a jolt rushing right through him. "In a rush?" he couldn't help but tease, laughing when she gave him a playful glare.

"Is that a problem?" Haley asked, watching as Nathan smirked at her.

"Problem? No problem. I just figured you wanted to take things slow. You seemed to like slow last night" Nathan said, as he moved his hands slowly up her back, smirking as he felt Haley shiver in his arms. Looking down at her he felt himself shiver, as he saw her brown eyes darken at his words. Leaning forward he brought his lips to her neck leaving slow kisses against it, his finger tips playing along the exposed skin of her back before they landed on the zipper of her dress. Hearing her whimper, he brought his mouth to her jaw leaving wide kisses on it.

"Please, Nathan" Haley implored, not above pleading with him. Her voice sounded needy, yet she didn't feel embarrassed by that, unsure, or unconfident. Bringing her hands to his face and taking his lips with her own, she was rewarded when she felt his fingers slowly begin to lower the zipper of her dress, until her back was exposed. There was a slight chill in her office, but she could barely feel it, her skin so hot and wanting, the burning within her increasing as Nathan slowly began to pull her dress down.

"Like I said you look gorgeous tonight, the red dress looks phenomenal on you, but I think it's going to look even better off" Nathan stated as he pulled her dress down further, watching as the strapless, red lace bra she was wearing came into view. He swallowed hard. So fucking sexy.

"Nathan Scott that is like the cheesiest line ever" Haley chuckled, her laugher turning into a deep moan as Nathan began leaving slow sucking kisses on the tops of her breasts. Tipping her head back at the sensation, at the pull in her body, the pull at her core, she brought her hands up and speared them through his hair holding him to her. "Nathan" Haley panted, her breathing increasing as she felt Nathan swiftly unhook her bra, his hand coming between them to pull it away from her body, before dropping it on the floor right near their feet.

"Gorgeous" Nathan said as he stepped back a little to take Haley in. To take in the rise and fall of her chest, to take in her heavy breasts, her rosy nipples begging for his attention.

Months ago he would have never thought he would see her like this. Hair tousled, chest exposed, desire in her eyes for him. He had wanted that, had wanted her for so long, but had never thought they would be here like this. He almost wanted to smack himself to see if he was dreaming, but he knew he wasn't. Everything felt so real, so acute, so intense for it to be a dream. The pleasure that was running through him, making him feel like he could spark, the sound of Haley's breathing soft and deep and so damn sexy, the feel of her hips in his hand, his thumb rubbing against the skin of her stomach exposed by her half fallen dress…..this was most definitely not a dream. The way he felt about her, the way he wanted her, all of her…...it was reality.

Shaking his head of his thoughts, he focused on Haley, watched as she looked back at him, a slight nervousness playing in her eyes, he imagined in regards to why he had stopped, about what he was going to do.

He didn't know how she did it so easily. How she could be so sexy and confident in one instant and then shy and reserved in the next, but he loved it. Loved that he could bring both sides of her out. That she could be in nervous anticipation about what he was going to do, and then demanding and impatient about him doing what she wanted. And he found out last night just how much he loved when she told him what she wanted. Her whispered, breathless pleas for him to kiss her deeper, to touch her everywhere, to move inside of her harder, faster…..God he loved when she told him what she wanted. It only added to his primal need to make her feel intense pleasure, his primal need to push her, push them both off the proverbial edge.

"So fucking gorgeous" Nathan repeated, as he brought his right hand to her breast squeezing it, his thumb circling her nipple.

He heard her whimper, knew what she wanted, and although he wanted to draw things out a little, wanted to savor her, he couldn't deny her what she wanted in the moment. Hell he was more than aware that for the most part he really couldn't deny her anything, especially when it came to giving her the pleasure she so desperately sought. How could he, when she gave him so much? A look, a simple touch, a soft kiss, the batting of her eyelashes and she could quickly have him on the edge. Last night….she had made him feel things he never had in previous experiences. The heights she had taken him, the way she had moved against him, the way she had kissed him, touched him….no he couldn't deny her anything. Bringing his head down he took her breast in his mouth, his tongue immediately circling her nipple.

"Nathan" Haley moaned, thankful that Nathan's arm was banded around her lower back. Had it not been she was sure she would be on the floor, her legs feeling wobbly and weak.

She remembered she used to snicker at women who claimed that one kiss from a man, one touch from the opposite sex, could leave them weak in the knees. To her it sounded like some nonsense from a cheesy Harlequin novel. Stupid, archaic, not realistic. But of course Nathan proved that wrong. The way he was wrapping his tongue around the nipple of her right breast, his hand moving over the other, his thumb whispering across her nipple….God he made her so weak in the knees.

Biting her bottom lip, she felt her teeth sink further into her skin as Nathan moved his mouth to her other breast giving it the same treatment. Licking at her nipple, sucking on it before leaving little bites on her skin, she cried out his name over and over again as he continued his ministrations.

God it felt so good, he made her feel so damn good. She breathed out a baited breath, her need and want to make him feel as good as he was making her feel, starting to overwhelm her.

Bringing her hands slowly down his chest, she smiled as the action caused him to pull her body more into him, taking more of her breast into his mouth. She could feel him hard against her leg, and although that had been the case for awhile now, although she had touched him, tasted him, had him inside her last night, it was like she was feeling him for the first time.

She couldn't help but gasp at the sensation. The feel alone of him against her leg letting her know how endowed he was. But she had learned the reality of that last night. When she had seen him for the first time as he undressed in front of her, as she laid in his bed ready and waiting for him, she remembered gasping inwardly to herself. The size of him, the thought of him being inside of her a bit overwhelming. But he had fit perfectly, and the feel of him inside of her, the feeling of them being connected…..it had been exquisite. The way he had moved inside of her, thrusting slow and sure, fast and hard, hitting places within her she hadn't known existed, causing sensation within her body that left her in mind numbing bliss…...amazing. At some points it had been hard to catch her breath, the sensation of him so hard and powerful within her, sometimes too overwhelming. But it had been amazing, and now all she wanted was to feel him, to touch him, to have him inside of her again.

Moving her hands to his pants, she unbuckled his belt with a speed and finesse she didn't normally have, smirking a little to herself as she heard Nathan moan against her chest as she brought her hands to the button of his pants. Placing her free hand on his face, she pulled his mouth to hers, kissing him deeply as her hands finished unbuttoning his pants before pulling down the zipper. She felt him kiss her more urgently, more desperately, spurring her on, and so she quickly slipped her hand down his pants, taking a hold of him.

It was her time to moan as she felt him fully in her hand.

He felt like silk, over hard steel. Smooth yet powerful. Capable of bringing her mind numbing pleasure. Pulling her lips away from his, she leaned her forehead against his as she began moving her hand up and down his shaft.

"Fuck Hales" Nathan groaned out, the groan becoming louder as Haley began to leave open mouth kisses against his neck and jaw, her hand continuing to move up and down his cock.

He hadn't expected this. As he learned last night, Haley had no trouble touching him, but he hand't expected her to be so brazen. But he sure as hell wasn't complaining as he felt her hand move slowly up him once again, her thumb swiping over his tip. "Shit baby."

"Good?" Haley couldn't help but giggle, as Nathan began to nod his head profusely, before thrusting his cock into her hand more, clearly wanting more friction. Making sure to collect the pre-cum from his tip, she used it to move faster along his shaft, making sure to twist her hand down at his base.

She couldn't believe she was actually doing this at work. Standing in front of Nathan topless, her dress bunched around her waist, her lips and tongue moving over the skin of his neck, as her hand worked him over, this was not normal behavior for her, and her normal self was internally chastising her, telling her what she was doing was wrong. But it sure as hell didn't feel wrong. It felt right. Maybe a little naughty and not so nice, which she could admit was sending her temperature rising, the risk of doing something she really shouldn't more of a turn on then she ever thought it could be. But above all else, being with Nathan felt right.

"Good….so good" Nathan babbled, as he felt Haley's hand slide down his shaft, before her hand cupped his balls. He could feel his cock twitch, took in the tingling at the base of his spine, and knew he had to stop her. He didn't want to, damn he didn't want to, but he didn't want to come in her hand before he had come inside of her. "You've got to stop baby" he said, groaning when she continued her ministrations, reaching up on her tiptoes and licking at his lips. He pulled her lips into a searing kiss, before pulling away, repeating what he had said.

"But I don't want to stop" Haley stated, not helping pout a little. She knew why he wanted to stop, couldn't help but smile at the sentiment, but she didn't want to, especially what with the fact that she knew Nathan could rebound rather quickly.

"Are you trying to kill me Hales?" Nathan asked with a smirk, groaning as Haley swiped her thumb over his head once more before abruptly pulling her hand out of his pants. Yeah she was definitely trying to kill him, he thought to himself, as his body felt an immediate sense of loss.

"Possibly" Haley laughed, it soon turning into a gasp when Nathan suddenly picked her up. She quickly recovered, wrapping her legs around his waist, gasping again as she did so, her heat coming in contact with Nathan's hardness. "God Nathan, I need you inside me" she couldn't help but confess, biting her lip as she felt herself blush at her words.

God when had she become so damn demanding?

"Not yet baby" Nathan stated, laughing at the look of shock and annoyance written on Haley's face at his words. "What?" he smirked.

"Not yet? Who's trying to kill who now?" Haley pointed out, raising her eyebrow at Nathan as he moved them in front of her desk, before swiftly placing her down on ground.

"I think you're going to be just fine, Hales" Nathan chuckled, giving Haley a soft peck on the lips, before he moved his kisses down to her neck.

"I think I would be more fine if you…..if you….God if you were inside me Nathan" Haley breathed out, her breaths labored as Nathan brought his hands to her breasts, massaging them in his hands. She cried out when his left hand tugged the nipple of her right breast causing her stomach to literally somersault, the wetness between her legs growing with intensity.

"Patience baby" Nathan told her, smirking against her neck when she playfully smacked him on the back.

He had every intention of joining them together, of being inside of her, deep inside of her, but he wanted to enjoy her body a little more before then.

He blamed her actions from this morning for his intense need to take things slow. To draw things out. This morning, before he had realized she had fled his apartment, he had every intention of making love to her once maybe even twice more, before they had to start getting ready for work. Despite the fact that they had made love twice that night, he had woken up that morning hard and aching for her. But of course Haley was nowhere to be found, causing him to unfortunately take care his the situation with a very long, very cold shower.

But now she was here. She was ready, she was willing, and he had every intention of enjoying that, of enjoying her, of doing everything he could to push her over the edge before joining them.

Smirking at the thought, he brought his head down to her breasts, his mouth taking one of her nipples slowly into his mouth, as his hand continued to tease the other with his his fingers. He could feel her arch her back, pushing her chest more into his mouth, more into his hand wanting more contact, and so he obliged, sucking hard on her nipple, hearing her gasp at his actions. Her breasts were perfect. They really were. The way they tasted, , the way her nipples were so responsive to him, the way they seemed to fit his hands…...perfect. So very perfect.

"Nathan..." Haley groaned, feeling him pull his lips away from her, a gleam in his eyes. She was about to admonish him, but instead gasped lowly as he brushed his hands over her swollen nipples before getting on his knees in front her. "Nathan…what are you doing?" she breathed out, whimpering when Nathan brought his hands to her legs, moving them up under her dress, caressing her thighs slowly, causing goose bumps to break out along her skin.

She bit her lip, biting harder when Nathan touched a particularly sensitive spot on the inside of her knee.

"Just undressing you Hales" Nathan explained as he began pulling down the rest of her dress, Haley grabbing his shoulder with one of her hands in an attempt to steady herself. He licked his lips as more of her body was revealed to him. Her flat stomach, her panty covered sex, her lean legs. Once he had pulled the dress down to her feet he helped her as she stepped out of it foot by foot, before he picked it up and tossed it as neatly as possible on the chair nearby, in an attempt not to wrinkle it. He knew her dress was far from her mind right now, her eyes glossed over filled with lust, but he knew she would kill him later if he so much as got a wrinkle in her dress.

"Hmmm that feels good Nathan" Haley moaned, as Nathan began leaving wet sucking kisses along her stomach. When he began to move his tongue along the edge where her panties laid against her stomach, she tightened the grip of her hand on his shoulder, her clit throbbing in need.

"You feel good" Nathan told her, bringing his hands to the edge of her panties, pulling them slowly down her hips, before slowly peeling them away from her center. As he began to see the soft black curls covering her sex, he couldn't help but bring his thumb to her slit rubbing along it, feeling how wet she was, moaning at the thought. "So damn good baby" he murmured, pulling her panties down the rest of the way along her legs, before removing them, and then tossing them over to where he had put her dress. Leaning forward he left a whisper of a kiss on her stomach, just above her center, before he stood, picking up Haley and placing her on the edge of her desk.

"Nathan….God Nathan I need…..I need you" Haley panted from the touch of his hand caressing over her knee, from the heated look in his eyes, from the throbbing between her legs.

"You have me baby. Always. What do you need? Tell me" Nathan implored, feeling himself harden more than he thought was possible, as he watched Haley bring her fingers to her right breast, running her finger tips over herself slowly, trailing them down to her stomach, before moving lower. He felt himself in some sort of trance as he took in Haley's hands moving over her body, only coming back to reality when he felt her grab his own hand, moving his fingers slowly over her center.

"Inside me Nathan. Fingers. Inside me now" Haley begged, cooing when Nathan did as she asked, quickly thrusting two fingers inside of her. She sat up, moving forward slightly on her desk. Grabbing the open ends of his shirt with her hands in order to bring him closer to her, she captured his lips in a kiss, in an effort to drown out her loud cries as Nathan began moving his fingers within her.

It felt so good. So unbelievably, so amazingly, so sinfully good. The fact that Nathan was pretty much still dressed, and she was sitting naked on her desk was adding to the intensity of it all, causing her to to thrust against his fingers, cooing when Nathan brought his thumb to her clit, circling it slowly.

"God you're so wet Hales" Nathan breathed out, as he pulled away from their kiss, trailing kisses along her color bone, before moving lower as he kissed the tops of her breasts. It took everything in him not to push down his pants and enter her, but he wanted her to come first with his fingers, his mouth.

Groaning at the thought he suddenly pulled his fingers out of her, kissing Haley before she could cry out in protest. Rubbing his hands along her legs, he moved them, gently bending them so that her feet lay flat on her desk. Looking at her, taking in the heat in her eyes, he kissed her once more before dropping to his knees in front of her.

"Nathan" Haley stated, sighing as Nathan began trailing kisses along her inner thighs.

A second ago she had been about to rip his head off for abruptly pulling his fingers out of her as she felt herself building towards a crescendo, but she could forgive him now, knowing what was coming next.

She breathed out at the thought, it becoming labored as she felt him begin to suck the skin of her inner right thigh. "Nathan….Nathan Scott….are you giving me a hickey" she said, repeating her words from minutes before, moaning as his tongue slid along her skin.

"Well I figured since you won't let me give you a hickey on your neck, this would be a much better place" Nathan explained, sucking her skin into his mouth once more, his tongue lapping at her skin.

He could hear her moan his name, see one of her hands grip the end of her desk, spurring him own as he grazed his teeth over her skin, before soothing over her brazed skin with his tongue. After a few minutes he pulled back, satisfied with the red tint of her skin from where his mouth, tongue, and teeth had worked her over. "Are you complaining?" he asked in response to her question, smirking when Haley closed her eyes as he began to trail his finger tips over said spot.

He couldn't help but feel a surge of heat run through him. The sight of the mark that he created, marring her perfect, delectable skin was such a fucking turn on. A turn on because he knew it was a mark that he and he alone would see. Caveman he knew, but he didn't give a damn. He knew what a lucky bastard he was, to get to be with her like this, have her laid out in front of him, naked, ready for him. He groaned at the thought, felt himself harden even more.

"No….definitely not" Haley gasped as she felt Nathan suddenly bring his head down to her center, his tongue trailing up her slit. Falling back on to her desk, she gave over to the sensations coursing through her. "More" she panted, cooing in response when Nathan moved his hands to her inner thighs, gently moving her legs apart before placing his tongue in between her folds, licking her slowly, sensually.

She had never thought something like this could be so sexy, so explicit, so…...damn good. Then again, she had only experienced this act with one other person besides Nathan. Back then she had thought it had been okay, enjoyable, but not all too pleasurable. A little bit awkward and uncomfortable to be honest.

That was definitely nothing like what she was experiencing now, white hot heat running through her, as she felt Nathan thrust his tongue into her some more, his thumb beginning to circle her clit. She knew that the pleasure she felt, the all consuming pleasure that was setting her ablaze, the pleasure that had her panting, moaning, the pressure building up so rapidly, had to be because of Nathan. Because of the fact that he just seemed to know instinctively what to do to make her feel pleasure, to make her scream, to make her cry out for him. Surprising, given the fact that they had only been together once before this. But last night he had taken the time to get to know her body, to figure out what she liked, what made her scream, moan, shout out his name. She knew he did it for her. Because he wanted to make her feel good, to give her pleasure. But she also knew he did it for himself, seeing in his eyes how much he enjoyed giving her pleasure.

She moaned at the thought, it increasing when Nathan brought his tongue to her clit, two fingers entering her. Combing one of her hands through her hair, she called out his name, as he began sucking on her clit.

"You taste so good Hales" Nathan murmured against her, before bringing his

tongue around Haley's clit, groaning as he felt her tighten around his fingers.

He knew it was in response to both his actions and his words, words that had himself throbbing. But God she tasted fucking fantastic. Out of this world. When in the past sex had been so much about him, so much about wanting to get off, being with Haley was nothing like that. This, this was loving Haley completely, entirely, in every sense of the word. Loving her with all of him. His hands, his mouth, his entire body. He wanted to touch every part of her, feel every part of her, taste every part of her. Tasting this part of her…..it was beyond anything.

Hearing her cries become louder, he crooked his two fingers forward, his hand reaching forward to caress her left breast.

He knew that she was close, already accustomed to how her body reacted as she was about to come. Her sheath was fluttering around his fingers seductively and all he could think about was how that felt around his cock when she came. Amazing. So fucking amazing.

"Shit!" Haley cried out as she felt herself literally explode into a million pieces, Nathan's fingers hitting a particularly sensitive spot within her, pushing her over the edge.

Riding the waves of her orgasm, she felt herself hiss as Nathan suddenly removed his fingers from her, quickly replacing them with his tongue as he licked her through her orgasm. Sighing in pleasure, she brought her hand to comb through his hair, the flat of her foot resting on his shoulder as she opened herself up more to him. When he was done, she felt him leave a butterfly kiss on her clit, before he began leaving slow, soft kisses along her stomach.

Bringing her hand to caress over his shoulder, she breathed in a deep breath, in an attempt to calm down. But it was no use. Even after her powerful orgasm, her body tingling with tiny aftershocks, she could still feel her body scream out in want for Nathan, the yearning becoming more acute when Nathan stood up in front of her before leaning down and and taking her mouth in a kiss. Tasting herself on his lips, his tongue, she kissed him deeper, her feet coming up to his hips before she began pushing down his pants and boxer briefs. As amazing as Nathan going down on her was, she knew the need she could feel burning through her, the need that was making her clit throb, making her stomach summersault, could be quieted only by Nathan being inside of her.

"You okay?" Nathan asked, taking in Haley's heavy breathing, her closed eyes as they broke their kiss. He was more than sure she was okay, especially given the fact that she was attempting to undress him, his pants swiftly hitting the floor. But he wanted to make sure she was completely ready for him.

"God yes. That, was amazing, really amazing, but now I need you" Haley stated, watching as Nathan smirked, before pulling off his already opened shirt, throwing it to the ground.

"I told you, you have me baby" Nathan stated, toeing off his shoes and socks, kicking them away, before he did the same with his pants and boxer briefs. Taking in the way Haley licked her lips as she looked him up and down, he felt his smirk grow wider before he placed his hands on her hips pulling her body closer to the edge of her desk. He couldn't help but groan, taking in the sight of Haley once again, sexy as hell, her body laid out on top of her desk, her hair tousled, lips kissed swollen, ready and waiting for him.

"Then show me Nathan" Haley panted, biting her lip as Nathan smiled softly at her.

It was a small smile. One of the rare ones he broke out into, but it was a completely happy, blissed out smile, one that had her heart racing rapidly. One she knew was similar to the one adorning her own face. As much as making love with Nathan was about the pleasure, about feeling good, it was also about being with him. As she told him a few minutes ago, Nathan made her happy. Completely and utterly happy, every day she was with him. And being with him, being so intimate with him, being able to share with him something so pleasurable, so amazing, so special…...well it made her completely and totally, blissed out happy too.

"I have to get…..." Nathan began, watching as Haley shook her head at him before hooking her right leg around his hip, causing him to lean forward, his cock brushing up against her wet heat. Groaning immediately at the feel of her, he pushed back a little in attempt to control himself from plunging in to her. "God….fuck Haley…..I have to get a condom" he explained in a strangled voice, watching as Haley shook her head again.

"I'm on the pill" Haley explained, watching as Nathan raised his eyebrow at her.

"Are you sure, Hales?" Nathan asked, wanting to make sure she was comfortable with what she had just implied. He knew Haley would tell him if she wasn't. She was far too smart and cautious not to. But despite that fact, he couldn't help wanting to ask her. To make sure she was okay.

"I can trust you right? You've been careful" Haley asked, watching as Nathan nodded at her in affirmation, already knowing the answer.

"Of course. You can always trust me" Nathan stated, it coming out strangled as Haley lifted her hips slightly, causing his cock to once again slide through her slippery folds, this time bumping her clit. "God Hales" he breathed out, moving forward and kissing her slowly.

"I've been careful too" Haley stated, feeling Nathan nod against her shoulder as he began leaving kisses along her jaw, his hand coming up to cup her left breast. Bringing her hand to grasp Nathan's back, she felt herself gasp as Nathan slid himself between her heat once again, making sure to bump her throbbing clit before suddenly plunging himself inside of her. Feeling him grab one of her hands with one his own, entwining them together, she brought her free hand to his face, her fingertips running along the skin of his cheek and jaw, as they locked eyes with one another.

"God baby" Nathan breathed out, as he bent down kissing Haley in a achingly slow kiss, breathing out against her lips as he felt her fingertips brush at the ends of his hair at the base of his neck, before her hand caressed over his back. Not helping but smile, he kissed her again, this time on her forehead, and then her cheek before returning to her lips, taking them slowly, savoring the taste of her.

He wanted to savor it all. The taste of her…..the feel of her. Haley hot and wet, clutching his cock tightly. Haley's breaths fast and soft, blowing against his face, as she began leaving slow kisses on his jaw. Haley's hand, holding his tightly, their fingers just as entwined as their bodies. He wanted to savor Haley, them, the moment, the feelings coursing through him. The intense want and need for her, for the pleasure that only she could provoke, for the completion, strong and hard, that only she could bring to him. He wanted to savor every feeling, every sound, every touch, everything. But most of all he wanted to savor the beating of his heart. So strong, so steadfast, for her and only her.

It felt amazing being inside of her, not just because she was so tight, so wet, so hot, the feeling of which gave him pleasure like he had never felt before. But it felt amazing, simply for being this close to her. Being her best friend, being in love with her, needing her so damn much, he had always felt an intrinsic tug to be close to her. To be with her, to lose himself in her, to just drown in her, to just drown in the way he felt so deeply for her. Being with her like this. Being inside of her, being so intimately connected with her…..he never felt more close to anyone in his life except for Haley, and making love to her…...God it made it all the more clear how much he wanted her, how much he needed her, how nothing else mattered except her, them, being with her. Always.

"Nathan" Haley moaned out, as she felt Nathan pull out of her slightly before thrusting slowly back into her, holding still.

It was exquisite. The feeling of him so deep within her. The feeling of him touching so much of her, filling her so intimately. The feeling of him moving inside of her, touching places that had the power to make her feel mind-numbing pleasure, panting, moaning, calling out his name….it was exquisite. So much of her wanted to urge him to move faster, to move harder and stronger within her, but still so much of her wanted to savor him, relished in the feel of him filing her, the feeling of it so overwhelming, and yet so perfect. "Nathan" she moaned again, as he repeated his actions, pulling out of her slightly, before thrusting back into her, this time hitting a particularly sensitive spot, the sensations it created, causing her to tip her head back.

Nathan breathed in a deep breath, trying to calm his widely beating heart, trying not to surrender to the white hot heat that was running through his body. It was amazing. Fucking amazing to be exact, but he didn't want things to end too early, the feeling of them being connected too perfect. But Haley was making his attempts quite difficult as she began to raise her hips up a little, meeting his thrusts.

Hearing her cry out his name, he moved his hand slowly down her right leg as she held it tightly to his hip, positioning it higher in order to allow him to sink into her more. He could feel Haley attempt to make him move faster, but he controlled his thrusts, keeping them slow, loving the feel of his cock sliding along her walls inch by inch, her walls vibrating against him so seductively.

"Hales" Nathan groaned out, as he felt her squeeze herself around him, clutching him as he thrust into her slowly once more. Speeding up his movements a little bit, he heard her cry out his name loudly as her hand clutched tightly to his back. He couldn't stop the smirk that formed on his face as a result. The fact that Haley was so damn responsive to him was too fucking good. "You like that, baby?" he couldn't help but ask, smirking more as she nodded her head quickly, before pulling him down into a sinfully hot kiss.

"Yes….God yes" Haley confirmed, in a breathless affirmation against Nathan's lips as he kissed her fervently, his hips rocking into hers a little faster. She could tell he was trying to draw things out, keeping his movements controlled, his speed slow. If it didn't warm her heart and feel oh so damn good she was sure she would smack him for torturing her. That and for the small smirk he had on his face. God he was so cocky. Then again he had a right to be. He knew what he was doing. Knew just the amount of speed, just the right pressure to have her clutching him tightly, pleading for more. He was making her realize that slow felt good. It felt really good, she couldn't help but tell herself, as Nathan thrust into her once again, this time, hitting her cervix. Biting her lip at the sensation, she rotated her hips, smiling to herself as she heard Nathan literally shout her name.

"Do that again baby" Nathan grounded out, his hand clutching her right leg, as Haley did as he asked moving her hips in a circular motion, his cock throbbing at the sensation.

God she was good, so damn good. She appeared to be innocent, and for the most part he was well aware that she was, but God she knew what she was doing. Picking up his speed, he began to thrust into her more, his head dropping so he could take the nipple of her left breast into his mouth, his hand playing with the nipple of her right breast.

"I'm so close" Haley cried out, the sensation of Nathan pounding into her, and his mouth licking at her breast overwhelming her. Moving her legs up higher she pushed her feet into Nathan's lower back urging him to go faster, wanting him to come along with her.

"Me too" Nathan stated, the feeling of Haley's sheath beginning to flutter around him uncontrollably letting him know just how close she was. Taking his mouth away from her breast, he swallowed her protests with a kiss, his moans intermingling with hers as he brought his hand between their bodies. Using his thumb, he began to rub her clit slow and steady, in contrast to his quick and frantic thrusts that had his cock withdrawing from her completely before pushing into her to the hilt.

"Fuck!" Haley screamed as she felt herself suddenly hit her peak, stars bursting behind her closed eyelids, as her body seized up, her sheath clutching at Nathan's cock. Burying her face into his neck, she bit his skin over an area she knew was sensitive, her tongue soothing over it. Her action seemed to do the trick as she felt Nathan thrust twice more into her, hard and sure, before he exploded deep inside of her, shouting her name followed by a slue of curses. Bringing her lips back to his, she kissed him slowly, moaning as Nathan continued to pump into her, albeit more slowly, prolonging their orgasms, causing tiny sparks to continue to go off within her.

"God that felt so fucking good Hales" Nathan couldn't help but praise, watching as Haley blushed at him in response to his candid words. Not helping but chuckle, he slowed down his movements, stopping slowly once he felt himself soften within her. "How can you be embarrassed by my words, after we just had sex on your desk" he stated, laughing as she swatted his shoulder.

"Nathan!" Haley stated, as he laughed some more.

"Oh and let's not forget me going down on you as well" Nathan stated, watching as Haley's blush bloomed more. However, as she bit her lip, he knew that the red hue coloring her skin was not just from embarrassment, but from heat, the heat he knew was similar to the type that was running through his body, as he continued to feel waves from his orgasm rake his body.

"Did I tell you how much I love when you blush?" he whispered as he leaned forward and kissed her slowly.

"Yeah you might have mentioned that before" Haley stated, with a small smile as she caressed her hands up and down Nathan's arms, watching as he smiled back at her. "You and your lines, Nathan Scott" she whispered, before letting out some giggles when Nathan playfully blew a raspberry onto the skin of her neck.

"You know you love them" Nathan stated, as he kissed her neck, before moving up to her ear. "I still remember that smile you gave me at our first tutoring session when I told you, don't say I never gave you anything. You fell for that one hook, line, and sinker" he whispered, smirking as he heard Haley moan when he kissed her neck once again.

"Whatever" Haley laughed, rolling her eyes as Nathan looked down at her with a smirk firmly planted on his face. Watching as his smirk grew a little more as she bit her lip reminiscing about that day down at the docks, she brought his lips down to hers, kissing him slowly. "Do you really love my blush?" she couldn't help but ask, having a hard time comprehending how he could find the fact that she could break out into red blotches at the drop of a hat, so attractive.

"It's sexy" Nathan told her, watching as a wide smile broke out onto her face, the sight of which made his heart beat faster. "I mean I've always loved your blush, used to do things I knew would make you blush, just to see it. I still do."

"What!" Haley stated, shaking her head at him in mock-disapproval.

"Oh yes. I mean it's not exactly that hard to do Hales" Nathan laughed, it increasing when Haley smacked his shoulder. "But now that I know how much you blush when we make love, after we make love, how that sexy blush of yours reaches everywhere," he stated as he ran a hand slowly over her body, watching as said blush creeped to her face, infused her body "you can bet that sexy ass of yours I'm going to make sure you're blushing all the time" he finished with a smirk, bringing his hand up to run along her body again.

Smirking at her, he caressed her breasts and then her rib cage, before he moved slowly down to her stomach, his hands spanning it's surface before his thumb flicked her clit once, twice, three times, listening to her gasp. He groaned in reaction at the sound, at the feeling of her sheath contracting around him as she orgasmed once again, his cock, which was still seated deep within her, hardening in reaction.

"God Nathan" Haley whispered, breathlessly as her orgasm raked through her body. It wasn't as powerful as the last one, but it still had her catching her breath as she moaned his name, the moans increasing as she felt Nathan harden within her. She bit her lip at the feeling, at the knowledge that even after coming hard, both of them still had the ability to come back so quickly.

"Seeing you like this Haley, being with you like this…..you don't know how many times I've dreamt about this" Nathan whispered as he slid his cock slowly out of her, before pushing back in, her walls already fluttering quickly around him.

He hadn't planned on taking her again, knowing that they needed to get down to the party, that people would start realizing they were missing. But he couldn't help himself. Even after having made love to her, he felt an insatiable need for her still burning through him. He couldn't help but wonder if it would always be like that. If he would always feel this constant urge to be with her, to have her, but he already knew the answer. He had been attracted to Haley now for ten years and that attraction was just as fire hot as the day he had become aware of his feelings for her. He knew he would always feel this way about her. That he would always want her.

"Oh yeah?" Haley stated, suddenly sitting up with strength she didn't think she had. Not after what they had done. She knew Nathan was shocked too, taking in his surprised face. Smirking back at him, she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to her. "Tell me" she whispered in his ear, as she leaned closer to him, smiling as she heard him groan in response, thrusting once more into her.

"Well you already know from last night that I've dreamt of you in my bed," Nathan stated, watching as Haley smirked at him once again, "but also your bed, here in your office, my office" he told her, banding one of his arms around her lower back, sliding her closer to him, before tipping her back a little to allow him to move a little deeper within her. "My mom's cafe, the RiverCourt….the docks" he whispered, smirking as he heard Haley gasp at his words, at his cock moving deeper in her.

"The docks" Haley repeated, heat infusing her body at his words.

"Hmmmhmmm" Nathan moaned deeply, biting his lip as he felt Haley meet one of his thrusts hard. "You don't know how hard it was to pay attention to you talking about my latest assignment on binomial equations or the Revolutionary War or The Great Gatsby when all I wanted to do was take you on our table" he told her, taking her lips in a kiss.

"A little public don't you think?" Haley couldn't help but laugh, despite the waves of pleasure that raked through her body at Nathan's words, at the images his words conjured up.

She couldn't deny that some of the same thoughts had run through her head on more than one occasion. Even back then, when she had been a virgin vowing to save herself for marriage, she had imagined making love to Nathan, not being able helping herself. The way he would look at her sometimes, the way he could make her heart race…..she had been in love with him and making love with him just made sense. If she was being completely honest with herself, she had always imagined, always wished that Nathan had been her first. Thoughts of them making love, of Nathan's hands and mouth on her, of Nathan moving inside her, had invaded her dreams so much so that she would often wake up in the morning half convinced that what she had dreamed had actually taken place. Unfortunately she had been wrong.

But now, none of it was a dream. It was real. God it was real, she couldn't help but think as she felt Nathan's hand move down her back slowly, massaging her butt as he thrust into her once again.

"When you want something, you want something Hales. At some points, having sex with you was all I could think about. Thankfully you were so into tutoring me, you didn't realize how much of an affect my thoughts of you had on me" Nathan confessed, laughing when Haley's eyes widened in shock, though he could also see lust swirling in them as well.

God. He could remember sessions where thoughts of them left him so hard and aching he had thanked the heavens they were sitting at a table across from one another, his lust from her hidden. Had she been next to him, had he been able to smell the apple shampoo she had used back them, had he been able to touch the skin between her jeans and t-shirt that was always exposed, had he been able to see her lick her luscious pink lips as she concentrated on the work they were doing, he was sure he wouldn't have been able to control himself.

"You really wanted me back then?" Haley asked, not being able to hide the surprise in her voice. She of course knew how he felt about her now, and after talking to him, she could finally admit to herself without fear that there had been times when she was so sure that Nathan wanted more from her than friendship. She had certainly felt that way. But to think of him wanting her back then, back when he was the Nathan Scott, King of Tree Hill High School, with girls following him around, a new conquest every week….it was hard for her to imagine he could have wanted her, book worm, nerd, tutor extrodinare Haley James.

"Yes" Nathan breathed out, moaning as he pulled out of Haley once again, before pushing back into her, his cock moving along her walls. "Does that surprise you?" he asked, watching as Haley nodded her head at him. "Why? I mean I know I liked to think of myself as suave and cool….okay fine I still do," he commented, watching as Haley quirked her eyebrow at him at his words, "but it was hard for me to keep my cool around you. I was crazy about you."

"I thought I didn't exist to you" Haley confessed, biting her lip as Nathan brought his hand to her face, cupping her cheek. "I mean obviously I existed to you but…..I just assumed before I started tutoring you, that you thought of me as your younger brother's annoying friend. You know the girl that made your life a living hell, the girl you despised, hated" she stated, biting her lip a little more as Nathan bent down and rubbed his nose with hers, thrusting slowly inside of her as he did so. She cried out, clutching his shoulder as she felt her clit throb in reaction.

"I never hated you Haley" Nathan said on baited breath, shaking his head at her before kissing her softly, his lips sliding against hers, his tongue delving into her mouth, as his eyes closed, taking her in. Her taste, the feel of her.

Hated her? He could never hate. She had driven him crazy, had made his life a living hell but he had never hated her. How could he, when even back then when he thought she had been sent to destroy his life, he had a intense yearning to want to be around her. Of course he didn't handle that well. He had after all made fun of her, teased her, tortured her, but it was because it had been his sad attempt at holding on to her.

"Nathan be serious. You told me on more than one occasion that you hated me" Haley laughed, watching as Nathan smirked at her.

"Okay there is that" Nathan smiled, as he moved his thumb over the skin of her cheek. "Listen I may have said I hated you Hales, and there were times when I tried to, really tried to, but I never could. I could never hate you. Not really" he whispered, smiling against her lips as she kissed him, as she moved her body closer to him, causing him to hit a particular spot within her that had her clutching his cock tightly. "God Hales."

"I could never hate you either. Lord knows I tried to do so myself when we were kids" Haley said, chuckling when Nathan placed a hand over his heart feigning hurt. "I just couldn't" she whispered, watching as Nathan nodded at her, his eyes holding an intensity that took her breath away. God the way he looked at her sometimes.

"You did however," Nathan began, kissing Haley softly "make my life a living hell" he laughed.

"Nathan!" Haley admonished, before whimpering when Nathan began to thrust into her more steadily, faster, one of his hands coming between their bodies to grasp her breast, his thumb whispering over her nipple. "Nathan" she breathed out.

"But that's what got me crushing on you, Haley" Nathan said softly, taking Haley's mouth in a kiss, breaking apart from her as she smiled against his lips.

"Crushing" Haley giggled, it increasing when Nathan nodded his head at her.

"Yeah crushing" Nathan confirmed, watching as Haley smiled at him once again. "I mean, you giving me a run for my money did piss me off sometimes, especially that time you punched me in the face," he stated, laughing when Haley rolled her eyes at him, "but yeah crushing"

"You threw Mr. Waffles in the mud Nathan Scott!" Haley said, rolling her eyes again at Nathan when he shrugged at her.

"Did I?" Nathan smirked, the smirk wiping immediately off his face when Haley clenched around the head of his clock as he withdrew from her. "Damn Hales" he groaned, his hand grabbing her hip as he thrust into her again, burying his face between her head and her neck, licking at her skin.

"You are such a liar" Haley panted, biting her lip when Nathan left a kiss on her ear.

"See that right there. You mad at me Hales. It's what made me fall for you" Nathan whispered into her ear, smiling when Haley moaned his name.

"You like when I'm mad at you" Haley laughed, throwing her head back as Nathan hit a sensitive spot within her

"Yes" Nathan breathed out as he began moving faster, his cock sliding in and out of her as he worked to bring them to completion. He groaned as Haley brought her hands into his hair, combing through it, gripping him as she began to move faster against him, her hips raising off her desk as she did so.

He could sense that she was close, knew she was chasing her release, the release he wanted to give her, the same release he could feel. White hot heat was making it's way fast up his spine and he knew it was only a matter of time before they both fell into oblivion.

Groaning at the thought, he moved his hand to her right leg, hooking it higher on his waist as he began to pound into her, biting his lip as she began to flutter around him, before she orgasmed suddenly. He watched as she grabbed her breasts in reaction, her head tipping back in pleasure as she shouted his name, and that was all it took for him to fall off the edge, coming hard inside of her, her sheath milking him dry.

Burying his head in her neck, he breathed in a deep breath, moaning as her sheath continued to flutter against him as tiny aftershocks ran through their bodies. After a few minutes he pulled out of her slowly, hearing her hiss at the action, the loss of them being connected so intimately, not being lost on him either. Listening to her trying to calm down her harsh breathing, he began to leave kisses along her shoulder, his hands rubbing at her arms. He couldn't help but smile against her shoulder as he felt her rub her hand down his back, he knew in her own effort to help him calm down.

He loved this part. Basking in the afterglow with her. Just being with her. As much as he loved making love to Haley, pushing them both over the edge, losing himself in the pleasure they gave one another, he quickly found he also loved the moments after. Holding her, kissing her…..just being with her.

Smiling at the thought, he felt himself quirk his eyebrow as he heard Haley begin to softly laugh. Pulling his head away from her he brought his eyes to lock with hers, seeing the amusement swirling within them. She was laughing. After what they had just shared. Good sign or bad?

"Well I'm certainly not mad at you for that" Haley stated with more laughter, watching as understanding came to Nathan's eyes, followed by one of the widest smirks she had ever seen on his face. She couldn't even find it in her heart to chastise him for being so damn cocky. What they just did, what he had just done to her, that orgasm he had given her….yeah he deserved to wear that smirk. Definitely.

"Well, what can I say" Nathan stated, his smirk growing wider as Haley swatted his shoulder. "See, I don't mind a mean Haley. It's very hot" he stated, watching as Haley shook her head in amusement.

"And here I've been thinking all those times I got mad at you, you found me intimidating. Damn I'm going to have to work on that" Haley joked, letting out a small laugh.

"Oh your anger has scared me alright" Nathan stated with a laugh, before turning serious. "But God it was what drew me to you" he said, watching as Haley bit her lip at his words.

"Nathan" Haley whispered, watching as Nathan smiled at her softly.

"You kept me on my toes, you challenged me, you set off a spark inside of me. When I met you no one had ever done that. I mean when we were younger it used to anger me. The fact that you could get under my skin so easily, fight back against me so fiercely, beat me like no one else could. But then when you started to tutor me, and I realized how amazing it was" Nathan explained, watching as Haley smiled softly at him.

"What was?" Haley couldn't help but ask, rubbing her hand through Nathan's hair, watching as he returned her smile.

"The way you could get under my skin, the way you fought back against me…..the way you set off a spark inside of me. My whole life everyone saw me as Nathan Scott, Dan Scott's son, the basketball star, the popular kid in school. But to you…...I was a person. A person, albeit that pissed you off, a person that you couldn't stand, a person that drove you crazy, but I was a person. You made me feel Haley. No one ever did that for me. You made me feel like I could matter outside the basketball court and God I fell in love with you because of that" Nathan explained, watching as Haley eyes widened in surprise at what he said.

He couldn't help but be surprised himself at his words. Of the feelings behind what he had said, was not the surprising part. Not at all. He was completely in love with her. He knew that now more than ever. But the fact that he had said it out loud to Haley….he didn't think it would come out so easily, especially after keeping it hidden within his heart for so long. He wasn't good with feelings, with showing them, with talking about them, with dealing with them. He never had. Hell sometimes he had trouble even telling Haley sometimes how he felt, scared of what she would say, of what she would think of him.

But telling her that he loved her, now, in this moment, he hadn't been scared or worried like he had thought he would be. It just came out…..felt so natural. To tell her that he was in love with her….it felt right.

"Fell in love?" Haley whispered, feeling her heart beginning to beat faster at Nathan's words.

"Yeah." Nathan said softly, bringing his hand to Haley's face, his thumb rubbing the skin of her cheek. " I mean…..I know it's kind of early for that. I mean hell we haven't even been on a date for Christ sake. I know we're doing everything pretty backwards but to me….."

"It's perfect" Haley interrupted, watching as Nathan nodded his head at her, smiling widely in agreement. Smiling back at him, she reached up and took his lips in a tender kiss, moaning as he deepened it.

"Yeah perfect" Nathan agreed in a whisper against her lips. Pulling back from her slightly, his hand tucked a lock of Haley's hair behind her ear, before he laid a soft kiss on her lips once again. "The way you made me feel back then Hales, God. I remember the first time I realized how staggering you could be. You just smiled at me. I said something funny one afternoon when you were tutoring me, you smiled, and shit it felt like I had been suckered punch. I remember thinking who is this girl? I've known her all my life, but who is she?" he said, taking her lips again in a soft kiss.

"Haley James tutor extroidinare" Haley couldn't help but joke, watching as Nathan smiled softly at her.

"Yes but you were more than that. You were Haley James the book worm: witty and intelligent, so damn smart. Haley James the fighter: strong, confident, fiercely protective of those she loved. Haley James the good person: kind and loving, the biggest heart. Haley James the beauty: gorgeous…..sexy as hell. You, just being you, Haley James is it what made me fall in love with you" Nathan stated, watching as Haley blushed. "You weren't invisible to me Haley. Do you understand that?" he asked, searching her eyes, wanting her to know that what she had said earlier about her being invisible to him wasn't true. Not even close.

"Yes" Haley stated, feeling her heart race at the conviction in Nathan's eyes. At the sincerity in them. "For the record, I'm in love with you too Nathan Scott. Always have been" she whispered, watching as wide grin broke out on his face. Grinning back at him, she felt it grow bigger as Nathan bent down kissing her softly, deeply, before pulling back and resting his forehead on her. "For all those beautiful things that you just said to me, for always making me feel comfortable to be me, for being you. Amazing, wonderful, inspiring….you. I love you so much" she stated, locking her eyes with Nathan's as his fluttered open.

She loved him. God she loved him. She hadn't expected to say that tonight, sure as hell hadn't expected him to say it, but there it was. Here they were. Happy and in love. She smiled at the thought.

She had been I love with Nathan for more than ten years, had dreamt about this moment for so long, but had never really thought it would happen. For one reason or another, she had never believed they would be here together in this moment. Never. But she had hoped, God she had hoped. So much of her heart had dreamed, that one day they would find their way to one another, despite what her head told her. Despite her fears holding her back. There had been so much of her heart that had hoped that she would one day get the courage to be honest with him about how she felt.

But her dreams…...they didn't even come close to being as amazing as the reality of knowing, of hearing Nathan tell her that he was in love with her. To hear him say it, to see it in his eyes, to feel it in his touch, in the way he made love to her…..he loved her. There were no doubts, no reservations, no niggling voices in her head telling her it couldn't be true. He loved her and God she loved him. So much. Completely and entirely. She smiled softly at the thought.

"I love you too Haley" Nathan said, before taking Haley's lips in a kiss, feeling the heat between them intensify once again, as the passion in their kiss was ignited. He wanted her again. Wanted to make love to her, it feeling fitting after what they just shared, after what they had told one another.

Haley was in love with him. Haley loved him. Damn he wanted her all over again.

"God I wish we could go back to my place or yours" he stated, drawing back from her, trying to calm his need for her.

"Why can't we" Haley whispered, attempting to pull Nathan closer to her, pouting when he stepped back from her slightly.

"I'm thinking we need to make an appearance at the holiday party seeing as you're the host" Nathan stated in amusement, raising his eyebrow when Haley shrugged her shoulders at him. "What? Now that you've broken the rule against having hot sex in your office with your co-worker, screw everything. You've become a renegade, Hales" he laughed, watching Haley smirk at him.

He swallowed hard, trying to calm himself down once again as he took in a naked Haley smirking back at him. Yup, she was definitely trying to do him in.

"I guess you bring out the naughty and not so nice side of me, Nathan" Haley said, watching as Nathan smirked at her as she winked at him.

Do I? I like that" Nathan whispered, smirking as he watched Haley wink at him once more before giving him a come hither look. Feeling himself cave, he let her pull him to her, moaning as she began laying kisses on his jaw. Giving into the sensations she was causing to boil within him, he closed his eyes losing himself in her, before he couldn't take it anymore pulling her lips into a kiss.

Groaning as she pulled him closer to him, her arms wrapped around his neck as she kissed him deeper, her tongue entering into his mouth to tangle with is own. Within seconds, he felt his resolve crash and burn.

He was already late to the party. Haley had been gone from the party for awhile now. What was another hour or so?

Smirking at the thought, he suddenly lifted Haley off her desk, laughing as he heard her let out a little squeal, her legs wrapping around his hips.

"If we're going to make love again, it's going to be on your couch" Nathan said, in explanation as he took in Haley's questioning eyes.

"Good idea" Haley stated, grinning at Nathan, the grin falling immediately when she heard a ring. "Damn it, that's my phone" she said in annoyance as she looked over at her phone that was sitting across her desk, the screen lighting up to indicate someone had sent her a text message. Groaning, she felt her annoyance grow when Nathan placed her back on her desk. Pouting at him, she turned to grab her phone, laughing when Nathan smacked her butt. "Hey!" she said, giving him a look of mock-indignation over her shoulder.

"Sorry" Nathan said with a smirk, holding his hands in the air as he watched her turn back to face him.

"Yeah I bet" Haley stated, taking in his smirk knowing he wasn't sorry at all. Looking down at her phone, she groaned as she shook her head.

"You okay?" Nathan asked in concern, as he heard Haley grown in frustration.

"Yeah, but Johnson is not. Peyton just texted me saying he has now begun to strip to the sounds of "Baby It's Cold Outside." As much as I hate to say it, you were right before. We better get downstairs. Maybe Santa arriving to the party will distract everyone" she said, grabbing Nathan's Santa hat and beard that was still resting on her desk and throwing it at him, before she hopped off her desk and walked over to where Nathan had thrown her clothes.

"Damn I was hoping you had forgotten about that. Thought I might get out of wearing this stupid hat and beard" Nathan said, throwing the Santa hat and beard back on Haley's desk, not helping the pang of disappointment he felt as he watched Haley start to get dress.

He never thought he'd say this, but he was now a bit annoyed with himself for spiking the egg nog. It had seemed like such a good idea last night as he, Jake, Clay, and Peyton had schemed. Who knew it would bite him in the ass. Damn it.

"Umm, I don't think so mister" Haley stated with a laugh as she watched Nathan pull on his boxer briefs, before stepping into his pants. Laughing some more as he pouted at her, she grabbed her dress, pulling it on, holding it up as she walked over to Nathan. "Can you zip me up, please?" she asked, as she turned around so that he could reach her zipper.

"Sure" Nathan stated, pulling Haley's zipper up, before leaving a kiss on her shoulder, smiling as he heard her sigh in appreciation. Wrapping his arms around her, he felt his smile grow as she leaned into his embrace.

"Thank you" Haley stated, letting out another sigh as Nathan kissed her shoulder once again, before moving his hands up and down her arms. Smiling she tilted her head back, watching as Nathan smiled back at her before kissing her softly. "If it makes you feel any better, I promised Peyton I would sing a Christmas song with her in front of everyone. Talk about embarrassing" she laughed, raising her eyebrow when Nathan began laughing rather hard. "What?" she asked in amusement, as she pulled away from Nathan's embrace, turning around to look at him.

"Don't you think everyone at the party has suffered enough with Johnson performing all night? Do you really need to make it worse by singing?" Nathan teased, laughing when Haley smacked his shoulder. "I've heard you sing before. Sorry baby, but it ain't so great" he stated with a smirk.

"What?! I'll have you know people generally like my singing voice, mister" Haley defended as she pointed her finger at Nathan. Hearing Nathan laugh once again, she felt herself glare. "Hey! Why are you laughing?" she asked, her glare deepening.

"Hales, Mrs. Hannesey doesn't count. The woman is old and deaf in one ear. You know she only tells you she likes your singing because you always used to give her an extra slice of pie when she would stop by my mom's cafe" Nathan chuckled, watching Haley's mouth open at his statement.

"Ughhhhhh, I really don't like you right now, Nathan Scott!" Haley stated, swatting a hand at Nathan as he attempted to pull her into him embrace. Rolling her eyes at him as he gave her a mock-pout, she relented, letting him pull her into his arms, his hands coming to rest at the small of her back. She held her glare, but felt herself let out a soft sigh at the contact, at the small smile playing on his lips. Damn him and his stupid, annoying….beautiful smile. She groaned in frustration.

"Yeah I know, but I also know you love me Haley James, and that's all I need to know" Nathan smirked, laughing when Haley rolled her eyes at him. "I love you too Haley James. Bad singing voice and all" he stated earnestly, kissing her softly, smiling against her lips, as he felt her smile against his own.

"Whatever" Haley laughed, smacking Nathan's shoulder again as he chuckled. Giving him a mock glare, she smacked him once again on the shoulder, before pulling out of his embrace and handing him his shirt. "By the way, you are so wearing the hat and beard now" she said, smiling when Nathan groaned at her.

"You're so mean" Nathan said, as he finished buttoning up his shirt, a smile coming to his face as Haley placed his tie over his neck, before she began fashioning it together.

"I thought you liked it when I was mean" Haley said with a smile, reaching up to place a kiss on Nathan's pouting lips before she resumed fastening his tie. Letting out a laugh at his groan, she stuck her tongue out at him, yelping when he smacked her butt with his hand once again. "You better watch those hands mister or I might be inclined to punch you in the nose again" she joked, smiling when Nathan let out a laugh at her comment.

Happy with Nathan's fastened tie, she patted his chest, reaching up and kissing him once again, before walking over to her desk to grab Nathan's Santa hat and beard.

"You are so lucky I love you Hales, otherwise I wouldn't be wearing this damn hat and beard" Nathan promised, groaning once again as Haley placed the Santa hat on his head, smiling as she did so.

He was glad someone was happy. Damn her for being the one thing that could break his resolve so easily. He just couldn't say no to her, especially if it was going to make her happy.

Shaking his head at her as she smiled once again, he felt his heart race as he took in the fact that it wasn't a goading smile, the type of smile she gave him when they were fighting and she had won or when she was messing with him and had gotten one over on him. No it was a genuine, happy, blissed at smile.

He felt himself break out into his own smile at the the thought, his heart racing once again.

"Trust me Nathan, I know just how lucky I am" Haley whispered, before she threw her arms around his neck, kissing Nathan softly, slowly, before squealing as Nathan lifted her up, and then spun her around, laughing as he did so. "Alright enough of that. Put me down and let's go Santa" she stated, giggling as Nathan groaned, placing her back on the floor.

"Yeah, yeah. Ho, ho, ho Merry Christmas" Nathan stated, quirking up an eyebrow as Haley began to blush profusely. "What?" he asked, with a small laugh as he watched Haley open her office door, her blush reddening by the second.

"Oh nothing" Haley denied, laughing when Nathan gave her a look of confusion. "Its just….I'm thinking that you're going to really, really like what Peyton got me for Christmas" she said, with another laugh as she pulled a still confused Nathan through her office door, knowing the faster they got downstairs, the faster they could leave the party and resume their activities.

_**AN:** Please feel free to leave a review._


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